By: Tiffany Chang, Peak Associate
- Walk as fast as humanly possible past AQ promoters so they don’t approach you
You did this before COVID-19 hit, and you should do it again! To further increase your chances of not being approached, use both hands and cup the sides of your face while you’re walking to avoid eye-contact with absolutely everyone. Terror in your eyes is a stylish choice, as well. This is a great way to avoid difficult situations for yourself when socializing again becomes mandatory.
- Go to Tim Hortons and buy up all the Timbits
Nothing’s better than frequenting the fast-food places on all campuses, especially Tim Hortons. Before we had to stay home, Timbits seemed like a staple in the SFU student diet. Why not take all their visible Timbit inventory and enjoy a not-so-light snack? Who says shameless indulgence only happens at home? Hey, who am I kidding? SFU is your second home.
- Break out into a dance routine in a study area
Have you ever wanted to blast a song like Tyler Shaw’s “Remember” and dance to blow off some steam at school? If you’re feeling overwhelmed when studying at, say, the common area near Saywell Hall, set a timer for just one minute. Sway from side to side for a few seconds before really going off. Then, my friend, dance like you’re about six shots in at a horrible nightclub where nobody knows who you are. Once the timer goes off, calmly take out your earbuds and go back to studying like nothing happened.
- Furiously wave your arms at the bus driver who takes off without you
I’m sure most commuter students at SFU have experienced missing their bus by a split second. This time, put your whole back into this one. When you know you’re not going to catch the bus, flail your arms around just for the sake of it. Even when things don’t work out for you sometimes, it’s nice to show people you won’t go down without a fight. Who knows? Your would-have-been driver might see your flailing arms in the rear-view mirror as they drive off. They might remember you and drive away 20 seconds earlier tomorrow to avoid this from happening again.
- Demand outright to be enrolled in your waitlisted class
Everybody knows the feeling of praying for that one person to drop that waitlisted course so you can get into it. But are you tired of waiting? Here’s an idea: storm into one of the professor’s other classes and demand they give you permission to enrol. The surprise effect will give you the upper hand. They’ll have no choice but to say “alright.” Relish in their shock as they, with wide, disbelieving eyes, send administration that sweet, sweet, email. Don’t forget to smile and say “good” while gleefully skipping out of the classroom.
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