Go back

What Your Graduation Cap Says About You . . .

Humour
EIC
EIC
Less than 1 min.
0
1307

Classic Square Academic Hat 

Gradcap1-arielmitchell

You graduated from either a university or high school and now have the minimum requirement to get some terrible job.

 

Classic Square Academic Hat Made Out of Construction Paper

LOLhat--arielmitchell

You either just graduated from kindergarten or are a character in a sitcom who got caught in a web of lies and this is part of your last ditch effort to convince your parents that you didn’t flunk out of college to become a tap-dancer. 

Jester’s Hat

Jester--arielmitchell

Your degree is a joke. Congratulations, you’ve just graduated from an elite clown college. Hopefully you’ll get into a good clown grad school, the only real money is in clowning academia. 

 

Pope Hat

pope_hat_web

Umm . . . man, I should’ve researched this more. You just graduated from, I don’t know . . . Juilliard?

 

McDonald’s Team Leader Hat

mcd_web

I could make an easy joke here about being an arts student or not graduating, but I’m not going to do that. Instead, I’m just going to say that this hat probably says that you don’t know what “graduation cap” means.

…

By Brad McLeod
Illustrations by Ariel Mitchell

Was this article helpful?
0
0

Leave a Reply

Block title

SFU to retain contract worker model for cleaning, despite calls for in-house employment

News Peak Web -
By: Lucaiah Smith-Miodownik, News Writer Content warning: mention of death.  For the last 15 years, SFU has outsourced its janitorial services through BEST Service Pros, meaning cleaning staff are not directly employed by the university. This decision to outsource labour has been met with notable and continued pushback. The SFU coalition, Contract Worker Justice (CWJ), organized a rally in late 2024 to advocate for in-house contracting of janitorial and food service work. SFU food service workers, employed by Compass Group Canada, led bargaining efforts in 2025 for livable wages by their employer. These organized protests call for the university to in-source and directly employ these staff.  Advocacy for this shift was amplified in July 2025, when Kulbir Kaila died during a cleaning shift at SFU. Coworkers later came...

Read Next

Block title

SFU to retain contract worker model for cleaning, despite calls for in-house employment

News Peak Web -
By: Lucaiah Smith-Miodownik, News Writer Content warning: mention of death.  For the last 15 years, SFU has outsourced its janitorial services through BEST Service Pros, meaning cleaning staff are not directly employed by the university. This decision to outsource labour has been met with notable and continued pushback. The SFU coalition, Contract Worker Justice (CWJ), organized a rally in late 2024 to advocate for in-house contracting of janitorial and food service work. SFU food service workers, employed by Compass Group Canada, led bargaining efforts in 2025 for livable wages by their employer. These organized protests call for the university to in-source and directly employ these staff.  Advocacy for this shift was amplified in July 2025, when Kulbir Kaila died during a cleaning shift at SFU. Coworkers later came...

Block title

SFU to retain contract worker model for cleaning, despite calls for in-house employment

News Peak Web -
By: Lucaiah Smith-Miodownik, News Writer Content warning: mention of death.  For the last 15 years, SFU has outsourced its janitorial services through BEST Service Pros, meaning cleaning staff are not directly employed by the university. This decision to outsource labour has been met with notable and continued pushback. The SFU coalition, Contract Worker Justice (CWJ), organized a rally in late 2024 to advocate for in-house contracting of janitorial and food service work. SFU food service workers, employed by Compass Group Canada, led bargaining efforts in 2025 for livable wages by their employer. These organized protests call for the university to in-source and directly employ these staff.  Advocacy for this shift was amplified in July 2025, when Kulbir Kaila died during a cleaning shift at SFU. Coworkers later came...

Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

For advertising inquiries: [email protected]
For promotional inquiries: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society

Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

For advertising inquiries: [email protected]
For promotional inquiries: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society