The Curve God listens

Written by: Zoe Vedova Everyone knows how the manifesto of the Curve God starts: THE CURVE GOD LOVES YOU! BUT ARE YOU PREPARED TO LOVE HIM...

SFSS forgets to make room for themselves in the SUB

Written by: Aaron Richardson BREAKING NEWS: Throughout the construction of the new Student Union Building (SUB) on SFU’s Burnaby campus by the SFSS, it has...

The Secret Lizard Love Affair

Written by: Jessica Parsons Rose Blossom is no ordinary girl. By day, she works at her local stuffed animal hospital. By night, her body transforms...

Students gather at AQ reflection pond to reflect on their own worthlessness

Written by Zach Siddiqui, Copy Editor Last Tuesday, hundreds of SFU students congregated at the reflecting pond in the Academic Quadrangle (AQ) to peer into...

Exclusive interview with long-dead SFU dungeoneer

Written by: Alex Bloom Sandra Swiftfoot is a third-year wizarding student with a minor in roguishness. She died exploring the labyrinthine corridors of SFU over...

The student oath

Written by: Nathaniel Tok The night after the last convocation ceremony finished and graduates had taken their thousandth photo of the AQ pond, as the...

“Helpful” advice to get you through midterm season

Written by: Jennifer Low It’s that horrible time of year again: midterm season. Students like you once again bury themselves beneath mountains of notes and...

QUIZ: Let’s Find The Best Crying Spot on Campus for You!

Written by: Aaron Richardson We know the turmoils of university education can weigh you down, but have you ever wondered where is the best spot...

Goodbye, my love

Written by: Maxwell Gawlick I have loved you, And been loved by you. I have hurt you, And been hurt by you. I have given you all, And yet you...

A real page of my philosophy midterm

Written by Natasha Tar PHIL 100W MIDTERM Instructions: This is an 100-question, open-book, multiple-choice test. Please fill out you’re Scantron sheet fully. Good luck! Your gonna...