My 2023 Wrapped was so wrong

By: Hailey Miller, Staff Writer The end-of-year has come and gone, and we’re left longing for recaps and wrap-ups that were conveniently forgotten until we...

STORYTIME: THE SPIDER IN MY BATHROOM HAS A FINSTA

By: C Icart, Humour Editor Hi everyone! Welcome back to my channel! I’m sure everyone has been wondering where I’ve been because y’all are obsessed...

Peakie gets real

By: Cam Darting, SFU Student and C Icart, Humour Editor Dear Peakie,  I started crocheting to help manage stress, but now there are crochet mushrooms everywhere...

Horoscopes January 29 – February 2

By: Cam Darting, SFU Student Aries March 21–April 19  The heavens have chosen. Aries is represented by Sikowitz. Just like the eccentric drama teacher, Arieses have no...

Dear Peakie: Where Are They Now?

By: Sonya Janeshewski, SFU Student and Olivia Visser, Copy Editor Dear Peakie,  Last time we spoke, you gave me advice on how to perfect my dad-sona....

Student updates: Spring 2024

By: Hailey Miller, Staff Writer Welcome back, students! Here’s to all that 2024 has in store. IN-PERSON CLASSES FORECASTED DURING SNOWSTORMS  No matter how much snow...

SFSS Council’s Quest for a Rights-Free Utopia

By: Sude Guvendik, Staff Writer Greetings, fellow students of wit, wisdom, and occasionally questionable decision-making! Let’s turn to another page of SFSS council drama, where...

GPA boosters are a joke

By: Hailey Miller, Staff Writer So you’re trying to boost your GPA, and you’ve come to the conclusion that the only way to save your...

Elf on the Shelf causes post-holiday chaos

By: Saije Rusimovici, Staff Writer The attack of the oat milk foam, 9:02 a.m.  I woke up to the sound of my Nespresso machine whirling. It was...

New year, same old hateful me

By: Cam Darting, SFU Student Roses are red, violets are blue, I hate everything, why don’t you? Dear readers, as I lay in bed this whole...