Your weekly Shrekly Horoscopes: February 22–28

By: Charlotte Gravert, SFU Student Happy Chinese New Year! Hardworking ox is jumping in front of the cart to pull us out of the COVID...

Captcha test, I promise I’m not a robot

By: Emma Jean, Staff Writer Another day, another incognito window opened because I’m too ashamed to have Tumblr in my browser history in 2021. As...

Top Ten things at the SFU Burnaby campus with the highest sex appeal

By: Juztin Bello, SFU Alumnus The Saywell staircase He’s tall. He’s solid. And he’ll have you sweating and panting in seconds. You may hate him...

How your sex drive changes based on what year you’re in

By: Sarah Russo, SFU Student You thought going through Strand Hall, awkwardly making eye contact with a baddie walking towards your shared lecture while you...

Dear cis people…

By: Madeleine Chan, Carter Hemion, and Dev Petrovic By Madeleine Dear cis people, I think we need to have a talk. I’m so glad that you’re comfortable...

Your sexy SFU Horoscopes: February 15–21

By: Charlotte Gravert, SFU Student On top of social distancing measures and a general lack of lust, Mercury is also in retrograde during this sex...

QUIZ: What will your first post-COVID romance be?

By: Kyla Dowling, Staff Writer It’s been the topic of your dreams, daydreams, and occasionally your nightmares, but it’s fine because fear is an aphrodisiac:...

Top Ten worst Valentine’s Day dates

By: Juztin Bello, SFU Alumnus Your aggressively single friends Your “single” friends will probably just mind their business on Valentine’s Day, because, shocker, it’s just...

Beedie student bails on Valentine’s Day date to check stocks

By: Paige Riding, Humour Editor February 14, 11:32 a.m. Baby Girl💦 — heyyy baby, happy valentines day! <3 hope your morning is going well and can’t...

SFU x UBC: a forbidden love

By: Alex Masse, Staff Writer Vancouver’s January air struck through the bones, the same as always. That is to say, it was cold, but if...