By: C Icart, Humour Editor
Kendrick performed at the Super Bowl last week, and while I didn’t watch the performance (I refuse to watch men crash into each other for fun), that didn’t mean I was exempt from seeing all the whining about it online. Some called it a “DEI halftime show,” while others complained, “DEI only goes one direction.” All this is code for, “I saw too many Black people on my TV, make it stop.” As you know, racists are hardwired to get suspicious and jumpy when they see more than five Black people in the same space. Which is something I rarely get to experience since I moved here. Did you know only one percent of BC’s population is Black? That basically makes me a mythical creature when you think about it. But it’s not all bad. There are, in fact, benefits to being Black in a mostly non-Black community.
2. You get to practice your impersonation skills
People always tell me I should do stand-up. Which I’m not gonna do. I’m a grad student. I’m already getting screwed over financially, why would I try to get other poorly paid gigs? So instead of impersonating people on stage for very little money, I do it for free every time I get mistaken for literally any other Black person. Once, a Black girl came up to me in a café like, “Are you (random name)?” and I said no and she looked at me in shock and said, “What are the odds there’s more than two Black people in here!” Homegirl didn’t even know what the person she was looking for looked like. She just assumed she would get to the location and whichever Black person was there would be the one. I was attending a keynote last year and one of the organizers thought I was the guest speaker. I should’ve committed and claimed the real speaker was impersonating me!
Welp, that’s it! What? You thought the list would be longer? There’s only so much I can say when the Caribbean food here is lacking, the DJs are playing god knows what in the club, and seemingly only a handful of salons will accept to do my hair. At least I can count on always having people reach out to me to organize Black History Month things! And sometimes they even pay!
