- I went out on a date with a really cute guy that I’ve had a crush on for a while. Right as it was time to pay the bill, he walked up to go to the bathroom, and was kidnapped by a pack of Tuscan Raiders! It caused such a commotion, and I was so embarrassed I just paid and got the hell out of there as quick as I could.– Kaitlin R., 27, Zoologist
- I had just broken up with my long-term boyfriend, and I needed to do something fun and exciting to get my mind off the ordeal. So, I went out to a bar later with a couple of my friends and had a few too many drinks. Afterwards, we got to a tattoo parlour and I made the biggest mistake of my life — I decided to get a tattoo of the tracklist to Hilary Duff’s self-titled album on my lower back. But it doesn’t end there. They put the wrong order down, as track six should be Underneath this Smile and track seven should be Dangerous to Know, not the other way around! Now I feel so self conscious when I go to tan! – Brittney K., 22, Teaching Assistant
- My boyfriend’s parents were out for the weekend, giving us some much-needed alone time at his place. We started getting busy in his bedroom, when his little brother accidentally walked in on us, with his head spinning violently screaming “redrum” very loudly. Not only does he tell his parents what happened, now he walks around the house constantly wielding an axe. It’s super awks!– Tasha N., 19, Barista
- I few nights ago I brought a girl back from the club. Things started to get hot and heavy very quickly, and it was going very well right until the very end. When she finished she yelled at the top of her lungs “CAN YOU DIG IT!? SUCKAAA!!!!” while shaking her hand in front of her face. Not only was it extremely weird, my roommate heard the entire thing and won’t let me live it down.– James K., 21, Student
- My best friend’s baby shower was an absolute disaster for me, because of a slight wardrobe malfunction. I forgot to remove my illuminati necklace before I went, and now word is spreading that I’m a member of a secret organization that is trying to rule the world through an authoritarian global dictatorship! How will I get a date now? – Ashley C., 32, Cashier
