Girls, we are not ashamed to eat our breakfast in the morning because we are hungry, take our morning wee, or go out for a run to work out our bodies, so why is masturbation still such a big deal to talk about?
Considering the fact that human sexuality is an inherent part of almost everyone’s lives, you would think that it would have been normalized and accepted as just a bodily function by now. But this is not yet the case.
For some reason, it seems like we are far more comfortable talking about a steamy hook up than a little self-loving, and that doesn’t make sense to me.
From my experience this attitude is especially common among women versus men. I believe this is because women are still uncomfortable talking about female sexuality out of the context of being with another individual. This attitude is just archaic, rooted in a patriarchal society in which women are used as sex objects, not active participants in their own sexuality.
Masturbation has been cast out as an activity reserved for the perverse individual, which cannot be true. We do not look at other animal species and make these accusations, so why do we put them on ourselves?
The act of seeking satisfaction doesn’t have to be regarded as an activity purely associated with sex.
It is not like we as humans are special: masturbation is seen all over the animal kingdom. From dogs spending quality time with blankets, to dolphins, parrots, horses, and turtles, it is a widely observed behaviour.
This may sound like a contradiction, but the act of seeking satisfaction doesn’t have to be regarded as a purely sexual activity. We learn how to please ourselves simply because it feels good. Arousal doesn’t have to be based off of porn, fantasy, or being with another individual. We know this because even as infants we are capable of masturbating without any of these thoughts in our heads!
I come from a really open family, so the shame and embarrassment associated with the mere thought of masturbation were not issues for me. But I know that my situation is not typical; I can recall several female friends who simply burst with joy at the chance to talk about their own experiences with masturbation when I brought it up.
This is because most of them had never spoke about it before and had always felt like they were alone. Now, but especially in high school, that isolation can be scary; no girl should ever have to feel that way.
Now, I know not every guy out there is ready to go out and talk about pleasing himself, but I think that society is far more comfortable with the idea of men masturbating than women. That needs to change.
Females out there should not feel like they will be judged for what they do with themselves to make themselves feel good. It is not only healthy to masturbate, it will also make any sexual encounter in the future a lot more comfortable. Masturbation is about learning to please yourself first, and that action should neither be judged nor questioned.
