Top Ten 2020 Halloween Costumes

By: Juztin Bello, Copy Editor The debate fly As the breakout star of the VP Debate, this meme-turned-costume is kind of filthy, relevant to current...

Your Halloween Horrorscopes

By: Kyla Dowling, SFU Student Aries: You just had to ask, “how could 2020 get any worse?” Now, we’re looking at a year-end zombie apocalypse...

What happens if the “Local Women in Your Area!” actually find you?

By: Alex Masse, Peak Associate Would you spend a devastating seven more bucks a month on a new streaming service for a show unavailable on...

Rich man suddenly learns about climate change when silk-encased pillow is too hot

By: Serena Bains, Staff Writer I woke up this morning beside my $800 Dyson Pure Cool Air Purifier and above my heated floors to utter,...

Fiancés upset they can’t hold big wedding that would have ended in divorce six months later

By: Paige Riding, Humour Editor SURREY, BC — After moving out from the rock they were living under, a couple is devastated to learn that...

My first sexual awakening

By: Going Through Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes, One Hexed Girl, and Parawhore David Bowie (by Going Through Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes) While most know David Bowie as the lightning bolt face guy...

U.S. presidential debate formats that would have gone better than what happened on September 29

By: Kyla Dowling, SFU Student I know what you’re thinking: what the flag-thumping-fuck was that Trump-Biden debate? There’s nothing worse than chugging tequila thinking “oh,...

Among Us is amongst the most relatable games for SFU students

By: Kyla Dowling, SFU Student If online school taught me anything (not that I’m too sure it has) it’s how to be antisocial and how...

A fevered conversation between a student and professor at 2:37 a.m.

By: Paige Riding, Humour Editor 11:42 p.m. hi Dr Gawner, my name is Lindsay Haugh. i am in your psyc 388 class. I will be honest, I...

My Duo: the Duolingo Owl Horror Story

By: Emma Jean, Staff Writer It was just after 10 o’clock. I’d finally submitted my essay on Canvas, and my burning eyes demanded I close...