The best places to isolate at SFU

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PHOTO: Gudrun Wai-Gunnarsson / The Peak

By: Nathan Tok, Peak Associate

Are you an SFU student without the heart to go long-distance with your partner, the university? Need a place to isolate on campus? True, SFU is quite deserted as of now, but here are some locations to hide in to ensure that your trip to campus remains solo!

  1. First floor of the library 

Did you even know that the SFU Burnaby library has a first floor accessible to the student body? Something about 50-year-old dusty PhD theses from SFU’s earliest days is probably enough to keep anyone away. Sneezes are frightening at the moment, after all. 

By the way, grad students, this might be where the results of your 620,000+ hours of research end up. Check out the picture of your faculty dean dancing during the first ever Clubs Day while you’re there. You may not miss dancing at clubs as much after seeing that.

  1. The AQ Gardens

Who’s actually going to be there, especially in the winter when it rains or snows? There are a couple of benches in the gardens for you to sit down and contemplate every action in your life that has led you to this moment. Now, your eyes and butt are wet from sitting on that bench. Way to go. 

Don’t try to do this in the summer, though. If you try and hide there, you’ll end up playing a one-sided game of hide-and-seek with the SFU Camp kids.

  1. Your TA’s office/lab 

Become an RA for some environmental science TA and then you can obtain keys to a random lab on campus. You can hide there since the grad students are probably choosing to work from home nowadays — if they can help it. Who knows with SFU. You are free to conduct any experiments you want . . . I recommend finding ways to make Zoom sessions actually zoom by.

  1. The Vancouver campus 

The only time I’ve ended up here was after falling asleep on the R5. It’s a good place to hide from the rest of the SFU community, but it’s in a sort of shopping mall that’s still operating for some reason — so maybe don’t go too far off the actual campus area.

  1. The SUB 

Similar to the gondola, it’s a place for you to hide that officially doesn’t exist on the SFU campus maps quite yet. I’ve checked! Just don’t stay pressed up against all that glass or you’ll give yourself up! Oh wait, it’s still not open to the public. Better luck next eon.

6. The parking lots. As long as you don’t have a car, the attendants have nothing to give you a ticket for and therefore, you probably won’t encounter anyone there. Just don’t stand in one place too long. Desperate attendants might count that as parking!

7. The Peak’s office 

9/10 readers of The Peak newspaper still say they can’t find this office. 10/10 of casual Peak writers have never even been into The Peak’s office. True story. I asked myself 10 times where it was. Clearly, the place is a secret fortress. For all I know it’s actually in the Surrey campus and the editors have been leading me along in their email signatures saying they’re in the Burnaby campus.