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What Grinds Our Gears: Not reciprocating head

This should be pleasurable for both of us

by a real sucker

Cisgender men on the receiving end of oral sex really need to return the favour, for both parties’ sake.

Let me preface, this complaint is based on one miserable hookup — conveniently, the last one I partook in before Miss Rona decided to cockblock me. Now I’m left here with an all too bitter taste in my mouth almost a year later and no more experiences to cleanse my palette.

Of course, if a guy does not consent to any part of sex at all, the last thing I want is to pressure them. This guy, though? His reason for immediately shifting to the most underwhelming missionary sex I’ve ever had is the most cowardly response I’ve heard. And as a straight woman, I’ve heard quite a few.

He told me, “I had a bad experience with a girl not washing down there well enough.”

Alright, so you’re telling me that after one unpleasant experience, you’re going to generalize every cis woman’s genitals? I’d use the excuse of “having a bad experience” to avoid using Chicago style in another history class, not for something like this. Imagine refusing to please your partner like that indefinitely.

It’s even worse when guys don’t make the effort to ask. Are you that determined to get right to penetrative sex that you don’t set the mood or try foreplay? Can you light a candle or something first? If I just loved having something cylindrical shoved in with no preface, my period and tampons wouldn’t be so fucking bad.

There’s more to this whole sex thing, buddy. When I have drool crusting on the sides of my mouth and my jaw feels like it could clamp up permanently, it really wouldn’t hurt for a little reciprocated effort.

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