Police are warning trick or treaters about a particularly uninspiring batch of candy corn that could pose a risk to children’s taste buds.
“No one is in immediate danger of being disappointed,” police announced to candy enthusiasts earlier this week, “but we are monitoring things closely. We’re taking a ‘better safe than bummed out’ approach to the situation. Anyone with any information about the subpar candy corn should contact us immediately.”
The candy has already disappointed Vancouver teens Trevor Smith and Todd Chan, and police are saying similar incidents could be on the horizon.
According to a police report, Smith and Chan purchased the alleged candy corn from a bulk aisle at Superstore. Instead of just being content with how average the candy was, the youth told police that they were unsatisfied with how bland it tasted.
“At first we thought it tasted like regular candy corn, which I guess tastes like sugar but not as good,” Smith recounted to The Peak. “After a couple of pieces, neither of us were really feeling it though. I still have most of the bag so I might just give the rest to my parents. I’d feel bad just throwing it away.”
A junk food belonging to the ‘sweet’ family, candy corn is a popular treat for this time of year — which police say makes it especially prone to disappointment.
“People get excited that they can buy candy corn in stores again and they immediately think back to eating it when they were kids. When people are nostalgic, they’re more susceptible to be underwhelmed by something. Just because a candy is seasonal doesn’t mean it can’t be mediocre.
“It’s Halloween, so of course people are going to be hopped up on Tootsie rolls, miniature chocolate bars, and anything else they can get their hands on. It’s important that people are aware of what kind of candy they’re ingesting so this doesn’t happen to them.”
The situation is similar to an incident in 2012, where police issued an advisory on all Sun-Maid Raisins, after reports flooded in about raisins that were drier and more stale-tasting than usual. Sun-Maid representatives responded by saying that that’s just how raisins are supposed to taste and the allegations were eventually dropped.
Until more is revealed about the dispiriting candy corn batch, police are advising trick or treaters to stick with candies that they already know will be disappointing, like Almond Joys or those little suckers with the shitty gum in the middle.
