Board games for bored university students

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Illustrations by Reslus

By: Victoria Lopatka

Are you the type of student that naturally procrastinates by any means available when you have an assignment due the next day? Are you willing to do really boring activities you normally wouldn’t ever do just to forget about work? If so, these games are for you!

UniverCity


It’s like Monopoly, except you don’t own any properties or have any buildings, so on almost every square you land on you end up owing someone money. It takes about four turns around the board till you’re completely broke. Landing on the bookstore square even once can almost completely clear out your bank.

 

 

Guess Who???

Similar to normal Guess Who, except with more question marks and uncertainty, since you’re trying to guess who the random person who just approached you is. Does he . . . have a psychology textbook with him? Is she . . . wearing a faculty sweatshirt? Is that the guy I sit next to in my 8:30 a.m. tutorial whom I never speak to?

Battlebus

Think your traditional game of Battleship, except your pieces are the buses and your opponent has pieces symbolizing sudden snowfalls, car accidents, and faulty engines — all designed to make you late for your midterm.

Cards Against Humanity: University Edition

Includes clever cards like “My most recent breakdown was caused by________,” “At my 9:30 lecture I saw________,” “I’m in debt because_______,” “Tuition fees are due ______,” “Microwavable burritos,” “I’m so exhausted,” “$4,500,” and “The cute girl in my biology tutorial I’m too scared to talk to.”

Partying and Studying

Take your typical game of Snakes and Ladders but replace ladders with studying and snakes with partying (or Netflix, more likely). You can climb the ladder and get closer to your goal, via studying, or you can sink further from your goal of graduation with constant snakes — AKA partying (or bingeing Stranger Things season 2).

Participation

Similar to the classic Operation, except it’s you trying to get a word in at your tutorial. Every time you go to raise your hand or open your mouth to get those precious participation points, some eager freshman classmate interjects. Bzzzzzt! 0/10 for participation.

Clue: Ultra Hard Stats Lecture Edition

You’ve missed quite a few classes this semester already — so now, the week before the midterm, you have to put all the pieces together. There are giant gaps in your knowledge, which your teacher will sometimes hint at . . . but you’re still mostly in the dark. Can you discover the answer to all these stat riddles??? The solution: you, in your room at 3:30 in the morning, sobbing over your textbook.

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