Q: How did you prevent a video of yourself smoking crack from being released publicly?

Whenever I smoke crack I make everyone I’m with turn off all their electronic devices. You know how annoying it is to give a coked-out speech and people are texting and shit? 

Don Mendleson, An old soul with new drugs

Just lucky, I guess. 

Patricia Johnson, Smoked a little crack in high school, but who didn’t?

My crack video’s been tied up in development hell. Hopefully it’ll come out by next summer though.

Doug Stevens. By “development hell” means “sold his USB adapter for more crack

I’ve never smoked crack, that’s how.

Tom Parker, NEEEEEERRRRRRD!!!!!!

I didn’t. I sure hope my mom doesn’t find out about it . . . The video stamp shows that it was way past my curfew!

Johnny Graham, Grounded for losing his dad’s best glass pipe