Sarah Sorochuk
SFU’s cheery campus renovation hoax
July 14, 2025By: Sarah Sorochuk, Peak Associate SFU’s summer semester has been absolutely thrilling. From the koi pond being evacuated, sucked dry, and refilled to loitering chairs from convocation, to even an abundance of high school graduations, there is never a dull moment. With convocation came the regular maintenance and the sudden beautification of the campus to impress the incoming guests and persuade them to send their kin here. The event called for nothing but order and elegance. Keeping things neat and tidy for the graduates’ important day. We saw this coming. But what came as a shock was a random post-convocation…
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My hear me out cake
June 9, 2025By: Sarah Sorochuk, Peak Associate Times New Roman (size 12) This font has gyatt to be the original “hear me out.” With its classy formatting and fancy lowercase “a,” this is definitely the most bangable of the fonts. You cannot…
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JOB AD: AQ Accident Control Officer
June 4, 2025By: Mason Mattu, Humour Editor and Sarah Sorochuk, Peak Associate Feel an urge to make a difference in the world? Do you have big muscles and are built like a Greek god? Are you ready to block student hooligans who…
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The Peak investigates: Mayonnaise mayhem
May 27, 2025By: Sarah Sorochuk, Investigative Journalist Dollar Tree has been caught selling squeeze bottles of mayonnaise for 25 cents a jar. What’s the reason? The scoop, or rather the spread, is within spoon’s reach. People have been making up their own…
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My Summertime Classes by Sarah Sorochuk and Lana Del Rey
May 19, 2025By: Sarah Sorochuk, Peak Associate Going to bed with a DIY spray tan, Summertime classes. Waking up for an 8:00 a.m., My summertime classes. I’ve got my backpack on today, Dreaming of a day when I could be away.…
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Dear Peakie aids those in need
February 4, 2025By: Sarah Sorochuk, Peak Associate and C Icart, Humour Editor Dear Peakie, I love merch! People think my favourite slogan is “fight, fight, fight,” but it’s actually “monetize, monetize, monetize.” I can sell anything! Candy, robes, guitars . . .…
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Nutritious nibbles: Baba’s sweet and Dido’s sour prairie pickles
January 15, 2025By: Sarah Sorochuk, Peak Associate My grandmother (Baba) is a spectacular homecook who runs her home kitchen she calls “Pat’s Diner.” All her kids and grandkids know when we go to Pat’s Diner, we’ll always enjoy ourselves. It’s time to…
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goSFU? More like noSFU
December 9, 2024By: Sarah Sorochuk, Peak Associate and C Icart, Humour Editor OK, it’s course selection season! Time to log into the easy-peasy, foolproof system called goSFU. It allows us to enroll in classes, request our wonderful advising transcripts, and pay our…
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Paranoia that LinkedIn is watching
November 27, 2024By: Sarah Sorochuk, Peak Associate and C Icart, Humour Editor Do you know the feeling right after you post something online? The doubt and fear that seeps in, and feels like darkness clutching your gut? The thought that something you…
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Stop with the Broccoli Heads! It’s bad!
November 21, 2024By: Sarah Sorochuk, Peak Associate There seems to be a trend among young people that seem to think bubbly perms are all the hype. Judging by the posters that have been put up around Burnaby Campus, urging people to “say…
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