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Album review: Here by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros

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EIC
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By Colin O’Neil

Here crafts a childlike ode to a life of peace

Here it is: the chaotic musical circus that is Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros has followed up on their breakthrough debut with Here. Led by frontman and founder Alex Ebert, known for his work in electro-rock group Ima Robot, the band brings familiar epics, soft Spanish love songs, and folk-rock jams in their newest offering. Though without a song to match the memorable “Home”, Here is consistent, solid, and most importantly, fun.

Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros is a band that uses myth as often as they use harmonies and trumpet solos. Up From Below was released in 2008 with the accompaniment of cryptic online videos, which portrayed Edward Sharpe, played by Ebert, as a messiah-like figure who wandered the desert in search of peace, music and an understanding of his place in the world. In the mythical story designed by Ebert, Edward Sharpe had come to Earth with the mission of healing mankind, but was repeatedly distracted in his quest by girls. The humour of the myth aids to the mood of the music.

Both Up From Below and Here are loud, full, and musically layered deliveries of a peaceable and childish attitude about the world. Though more outspoken than they once were, Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros remains shrouded in myth. From the group’s origins to their abnormal take on spontaneity and innocence, the music and the band both fascinate and bring laughter to your eardrums.

Here begins with the single “Man on Fire”, a simple song about creative output, dance, and learning. Like the rest of the record, it builds and falls with the aid of co-vocalist Jade Castrinos. The album only gets weirder and funkier. The Great Depression-era folk song “I Don’t Wanna Pray” addresses religion while bouncing along with background gospel singers and verses traded between Castrinos and Ebert. The soft “Maya” follows, revealing the band’s connection to Spanish guitar music and booming horns. The rest of the album is an orgy of trumpet solos, simple chords and the overarching theme of love.

Here offers more than its nine songs of solid musical creation. Amid its hippie notions of peace and love are appeals to the simple things in life. It urges those who may have forgotten to reconsider the value of a child’s mind, a child’s inhibitions and a child’s love. It delivers musically and succeeds in challenging our normative order. It makes us dance and think, and urges us to be here.

Sardine Can just another fish in the sea

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EIC
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By Ljudmila Petrovic

New Spanish tapas joint in Gastown serves up satisfying but unadventurous appetizers

The Sardine Can is the newest addition to Gastown’s foodie scene, located in the heart of the neighborhood. Pay attention though, because it’s easy to miss. It’s a small restaurant, with a short bar and three long tables; more likely than not, you’ll have to share a table with some neighbors (like sardines in a can, one might say).

Upon being seated, each table receives a glass bottle of agua. For those that need to brush up their Spanish, that’s water. The atmosphere is cozy and comfortable; you feel like you’ve gone out for a nice dinner, but it’s not ostentatious.

On the server’s recommendation, we started with their house special, tostas de sardinas (smoked sardines on toast). It was a pleasant surprise: they weren’t as salty as one would expect from sardines, and the parsley added a nice balance to the rich flavor of the fish. The other items we had were all $10 — too much for the size of a tapas dish for most broke students — and, though they were tasty, they didn’t warrant breaking the bank. The spicy garlic prawns, or gambas al ajillo were nothing of note. They were tasty enough, neither spicy nor garlicky, but a little on the oily side.

Next, we had chicken cooked in a delicious tomato sauce with Moorish spices. Though it was slightly blander than I might have liked, it was nonetheless satisfying.

The hands-down crowning moment of the meal was that day’s special: braised lamb cheek with olives, pine nuts, and dried grapes. The meat was tender in the way that only a good lamb dish can be, and it was the only dish that I would have wanted seconds of.

Some other dishes on the menu were guisado de pulpo  (octopus, potato, and chorizo stew) and albondigas (meatballs cooked in tomato and Rioja).

Overall, the food was of high quality, and was very tasty, but played too much on the safe side to be exceptional tapas; full entrees are allowed to play it safe, but with the small amount you get with tapas, each bite should be impressive and bold.

Other than this, the service was exceptional: every single server and staff member was cheery and attentive, making the environment extremely comfortable.

While they accept cards, there’s a 10 per cent discount for anybody paying with cash, so be sure to hit up an ATM on your way.

The Sardine Can is charming and the food is good, but it’s an addition to Vancouver’s culinary scene that you can skip with no loss.

Sperm 101

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EIC
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By Ms. X

“I’d like to know more about semen. As a woman, I don’t really know much about my boyfriend’s load. For example, when he pre-cums, what is it?”

It’s time to get to the bottom of all the questions about your man’s little men: sperm. This question is one of a couple out there that are commonly asked, so let’s tackle a few of them here.

“Is there potent sperm in pre-ejaculation fluid?”

Before your man ejaculates there is a small amount of fluid released first. The “pre-cum” is a man’s body preparing for sex. It lubricates and paves the way for sperm to make a safe journey during intercourse. Pre-cum typically doesn’t have a high amount of fertile sperm, but that doesn’t mean there’s no risk of pregnancy. Old sperm can still be found in the penis and this is the sperm that will be ejaculated with the pre-cum. So while the chance of getting pregnant from this pre-orgasm ejaculation is lower than the main show, there still is a chance. Letting your partner get away with the “pull out” is not a way to ensure you will be pregnancy free. So wrap it up! This will also prevent the transfer of STI’s that can be found in the pre-cum fluid.

“Does drinking alcohol affect the potency of sperm?”

There is a huge correlation between drinking alcohol and the production of your swimmers. Though it may not be permanent, boozing and partying slows the production of sperm, lowering a man’s count. It also increases the amount of abnormal sperm produced and reduces the mobility of those that may have otherwise made it to their final destination. On that note, if you are planning on being a father one of these days, go light on the sauce.

“Are sperm victim to the ‘you are what you eat’ belief?”

While drinking may lead to garbage semen, it may also be important to your partner that your love juice doesn’t taste like trash. It makes sense that there exists a correlation between what you put into your body and what it produces. If you’re ingesting something potent, such as garlic or highly spiced food, the sperm is likely to be unappealing in taste. To sweeten your load, try foods high in natural sugar content. These mostly include fruits such as pineapple, plums, mangos, and anything in the citrus family. Foods high in different acids and nutrients will lead to an array of flavours, some buttery, some bitter, some light, and maybe some that are even tasty. The consistency of semen can also depend on what you’re eating. Ensuring you keep hydrated will keep your cum light for your partner. If your sperm has an unappetizing appeal for your partner, and you have tried altering your diet, the solution may be as simple as giving them a piece of gum. Pop in a piece, and chew carefully!

Ski Ninjas: Butt Plug

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EIC
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By Kyle Lees at Ski Ninjas

This article is about a man who only read the headlines of articles

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EIC
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By Brad McLeod

BURNABY — A local man believes that he is just as well informed and educated as any full newspaper reader by simply reading the headlines.

Joe Rubin, a self-described intellectual, is certain that he is as much “in-the-know” as anyone else by only reading a very small per cent of a periodical’s content.

“I find the bulk of newspapers is just filler and doesn’t really add anything to one’s understanding,” commented Rubin. “It’s usually just filled with some dumb quote from somebody who doesn’t really have anything to say, but they publish every single insufferable word, and then they add some asinine statistic that doesn’t really mean anything.”

Rubin isn’t alone in his opinion; a poll conducted by The Peak amongst the student population has found that up to 42 per cent of readers only read the headlines most or some of the time.

“The headline is a snapshot that captures everything you need to know,” Rubin continued. “If I see a story that says ‘Three hundred dead in tragic conga line accident’, I know exactly what the story’s about; how could that possibly require any additional explanation?”

Rubin has stated that he hasn’t read more than a headline in over 15 years and has now found the time to not only read all his local papers but almost every national and international publication in the world, a fact he is known to bring up often in conversation with close friends, family and total strangers.

“I know a lot of people who will waste their entire morning reading one newspaper cover to cover,” he said. “I can get all that information in five minutes, know everything that’s going on, and not be suffocated by all that rhetoric, opinion and useless ‘information.’ ”

So just what does Rubin do with all his free time? He says that without newspapers taking up so much of his time, he has plenty of time to focus on his real passions.

“I like to watch movies — well I stay through the trailers, so that only takes a couple minutes — and I love music, but I just skip to the choruses so that’s pretty quick,” he explained. “I was thinking of traveling, but I usually end up flipping through post cards for the highlights. I keep hearing about this thing called Twitter.”

Despite a wide array of “interests,” Rubin actually spends the majority of his time finding new ways to save time. He believes that because of his efficiency he is well on his way to becoming the most educated man on the planet, although the definition of irony seems to have evaded his education.

Petter Watch: June 18th

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EIC
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Six empty bottles of Purell hand sanitizer found in Petter’s office following convocation.

Whistler University sidelines local community

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EIC
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By Jessica Wind — The Cascade (CUP)

Image by: Paul Williams (Flickr)

Towering mountains, a bustling village, sensational restaurants, and now university students? The internationally-known vacation destination for both summer and winter sports will soon be home to students not unlike us. Whistler University could open its doors as early as next year.

What good can this possibly bring to the Olympic Village? It will be a state of the art facility, constructed on some of the last remaining wetlands in the area. The proposed private university’s programs are clearly aimed at an international market rather than bolstering the local community. An influx of students looking to combine vacation and education is expected. At a projected capacity for only 1500 students, 70 per cent of them will likely be international.

Whistler is already the place to be if you want to rub elbows with people from every corner of the planet. But the community is also ripe with locals that have made their home in the mountain resort, and this university doesn’t seem open to those looking for a close-to-home education. This is tourism in the guise of education.

The website claims to have a focus on sustainability that will ultimately benefit the local community. But it also boasts an international draw, appealing to students both young and mature looking for an exotic learning experience.

While many of the programs directly relate to Whistler’s most important industries, they encompass a random smattering of educational avenues. You are welcome to study tourism, sustainability, leadership, culinary arts (as per request by local restaurants) or a master’s in business application. There are also programs set up to “provide university preparatory programs . . . to give our First Nations students a better chance of success in university than they currently achieve.” A fair trade, considering the school is being built in their traditional territory.

The question is, what exactly will this school do to bolster Whistler’s economy? I don’t think even they know, as the website overview offers a buzzword heavy plan to serve the local community.

The locals, however, have been against it for years. “Pave paradise to put up a parking lot,” said J. Wright, one Whistler resident, quoting Joni Mitchell. Mr. Wright has lived just south of the village for the last 12 years. He is sure that while the University may accomplish some of its initial goals, it will also create a bigger party scene than the village already experiences. After all, students have to blow off steam somewhere, and the village is ripe with pubs, clubs and restaurants.

“One day tourists will decide they’ve had enough and stop coming, and no one will know why,” Wright said.

What about other schools nearby with similar programs? The Vancouver Sun reports that both UNBC and BCIT are in support of the project, assuming it will attract more students to their institutions as well. Sure, studying in Whistler would be neat, but it may be one of those “too much of a good thing” scenarios.

Ultimately, Whistler U will feature primarily two types of students. There will be those who are too busy to enjoy where they are, who will hole up in their rooms studying — and therefore not buy into the consumer economy. Then there will be the other kind of student — the partier. These students will wholly contribute to the restaurants and bars, but will forget that they are there to learn. They will tarnish the winter paradise image that Whistler has maintained.

Whether it’s the destroyed wetlands, the lack of support for locals, or the likelihood of party-loving students overtaking the town, Whistler University is just a bad idea, through and through.

Join the Club: The Sarah Whitaker Club

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EIC
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New to SFU? Missed clubs day? Finding it hard to make friends? Running out of pills to combat the crippling loneliness? Well I’ll bet there’s a club that can keep you from collapsing into a puddle of self-loathing! JOIN THE CLUB is a new feature on some of SFU’s lesser known clubs!

 

This week we highlight . . .

The Sarah Whitaker Club!

 

Founded last semester, the Sarah Whitaker club is by far the pre-eminent source for the discussion, appreciation, and all things related to second-year communications major, Sarah Whitaker.
Club founder, president, and sole member Randall Cowen told The Peak, “I started the club because I noticed that there wasn’t really any place on campus where people could meet up to discuss why Sarah was wearing her blue hoodie today instead of her red one, or just leisurely chat about the flawlessness of her skin this morning.
The fledgling club, despite its lack of recruitment, sees quite a bit of activity and now boasts the largest collection of photos taken of a person without their knowledge in North America. Cowen foresees future growth in the summer, with such hard hitting issues being tackled as “who was that guy that stayed over until ‘after midnight,” and “if he touches one perfect hair on her head, I will gut him like a fish.”
See Randall? We printed your article, just like the note said. Now, please, just turn yourself in. Things can’t go back to way they used to be, but we know people wh can help you.

– Gary Lim

Word on the Street: How’s the weather?

By
EIC
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“Seriously? That’s the best you can come up with? Next.”

Rebecca Winters — Speed Dater

 

“Wait, is this really — I mean actually? Oh god, *joyful sobbing noises*”

Russ Kincaid — Meteorologist

 

“I guess it’s nice out, though it’s hard to tell since I painted my windows black. You know, to blow out the mind-rays.“

Gregory Barnett — Tin foil hat man

 

“Werthers? You’re just in luck my dear; I just opened a fresh bag in the pantry. Now you just sit tight, while I tell you about the Crimean war.“

Betty Winslow — Adorably racist

 

“Meh. You’ve seen the underside of a molten crust once, you’ve seen it a thousand times.”

Z’uul — King of the mole people

Legislation is the new negotiation

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EIC
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By Jennifer Bednard

Image By: Wade Kelly (Flickr)

Last year, labour minister Lisa Raitt forestalled several attempts at strike action by employees at Air Canada. To do this, she had their jobs reclassified as “essential services,” and thus prevented labour action in the name of public safety. Back in mid-March, the B.C. government acted in a similar manner, enacting Bill 22, which forced members of the B.C. Teachers’ Federation to return to work, and prevented them from enacting any further walkouts. Even more recently, the House of Commons pushed through a piece of legislation to end a Canadian Pacific Railway workers’ strike.

These are separate incidents, but they point to a disturbing trend of government interference in labour disputes, both in cases where the government is legislating its own employees back to work, and in cases where the workers are employed by businesses outside direct government control.

When the government passes laws to force its own employees back to work, they bypass the negotiation process. We can use the teachers’ strike as an example as to how this dynamic plays out. When negotiation hit a stumbling block, like when the provincial government refused to budge from its net-zero negotiation policy and the teachers refused to accept it, the teachers considered going on strike. The government quickly tabled legislation that forced teachers back to work, with no possibility of labour action for at least six months, and imposed a mediator (chosen by the government) to resolve the dispute. This illustrates a fundamental disregard for the entire concept of negotiation, where both sides are supposed to meet on relatively even ground and come to an agreement by allowing certain concessions to the other side. The workers have the power to strike, and the employer has the power to sit and wait as the workers slowly run out of money. A prolonged strike is not good for either party, but it may encourage both sides to reach an agreement.

It is also problematic when the government involves itself in a private corporation’s labour dispute. Contract negotiations are meant to take place between the employer and the employees. A third party may be brought in after negotiations break down and no agreement is in sight, but government interference is only excused in cases where the average citizen is put in significant danger or hardship due to the labour action. This was not the case for the Air Canada strike. Though inconvenient for a great number of people, Air Canada workers simply refusing to work would not be devastating for Canadians. Legislation in the company’s favour only serves to create a larger power imbalance, removing the workers’ only source of bargaining power.

The government is doing itself no favours. The public isn’t outraged that public servants or Air Canada baggage handlers are being forced back to work, since these aren’t popular groups to begin with. The teachers are either more or less sympathetic, often depending on where you stand on the political spectrum. But these aren’t the only contracts coming up for renegotiation. What’s going to happen when workers whose jobs genuinely are essential and who tend to get better press, such as nurses, have to renegotiate a contract? Will the threat of legislation make them more likely to quickly agree with government proposals? Or will it make them feel like heroes for defying them? Only time will tell.

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Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

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For promotional inquiries: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society

Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

For advertising inquiries: [email protected]
For promotional inquiries: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society