By Sajid Akhtar

The following encounter is the result of a simple search for a little salvation on Burnaby Mountain. After running rectangles around the Academic Quadrangle and the rare failure of Google to provide me with an answer, I ended up having to turn for help to the only one who could help me in this hour of need . . . some girl hanging out in the hallway.  

Me: “Hello, can you please tell me where the Interfaith Center is . . .”

Stranger: “Center? Do you mean Center to play?”

Me: “No, no! Interfaith Center . . . where people go to pray”

Stranger: “Play? If you want to play you go to the East Gym”

Me: “No, pray! . . . P-R-A-Y”

Stranger: “You can play in the gym, the field … where do you want to play?”

Me: I don’t want to play . . . I want to pray!

*I put both hands together in aggression and did a typical praying gesture*

Stranger: “Yes, play, with an l, I know, if you go to the East G . . .”

Me: “No! Not play, PRAY! With an r!”

*Shaking my head profusely, I then demonstrated at least 4 variants of praying based on different religions*

Stranger: “You’re looking to . . . go to a play?”

Me: No, PRAY! P-R-A-Y!!!

Stranger: “Play?”

*Frustrated to no end I decided to make one final attempt to get through to her*

Me: “DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD!?!”

Needless to say she did not lead me to the Interfaith Center. I still don’t know why my request was so hard to understand . . . whatever, I guess I’ll just have to pray for her. That is if I ever actually find the Interfaith Center. . .

Stranger: “What? You’re going to play for me? Just go to the East Gy . . .”

EDITOR’S NOTE: The Interfaith Center is located in the Academic Quadrangle just around the corner from the Physics entrance to SHRUM Science Center. This could be useful information both for anyone looking to pray as well as anyone interested in not being yelled a by someone looking for it.