A completely true and historically accurate history of Canada

  By: Gabrielle McLaren 1351: Man living his best life taps tree and decides to boil sap on a dare. Discovers how to make maple syrup,...

Drunk text to the prof that I hate

By: Tiffany Chang

SFU conspiracies: the ski resort theory

By: Hannah Davis Does anyone else think it strange that Simon Fraser University is placed right on the top of a mountain? Do you know...

The life cycle of the student

By: Iain Edgar To some, the student may seem to be a useless organism: a creature devoid of individual thought whose only purpose is to...

Student fortune cookies

By: Nathaniel Tok University life is fairly predictable. If you’re in a first-year math class, you get the 8:30 a.m. class. If you’re in your...

Comedic Poetry: A year in three acts

By: Hannah Davis FALL Today is the day First day back to classes And I know I’m going to do it I will kick these classes’ asses. Now in my...

Tips on what to wear at SFU

By: Victoria Lopatka Wear all-grey. Grey pants, socks, shoes, shirt, and backpack. That way, if you see someone you don’t like, you can just blend...

SFU mottos through the ages

By: Natasha Tar We all know that SFU’s current motto is “nous sommes prêts,” which means “we . . . is . . .” and...

New SFU classroom policies

By: Tiffany Chang Having to say an oath before starting class: Yup. You read those words right. As of next week, students must pledge allegiance...

Translation guide for comments on your paper

By: Winona Young The season of returning essays is about to arise, and students will be filled with relief, confusion, and inevitable disappointment . ....