Choose your own adventure: fall sports edition

By: Carter Hemion, Humour Editor INTRO “I almost can’t believe it,” you think. “After 27 long, arduous years, they’ve done it.” Ditching your evening class to...

Your SFU horoscopes September 20–26

By: Carter Hemion, Humour Editor Aries: Dress outside your aesthetic, go to a new coffee shop, and order under a fake name this week, even...

SFUnexplained: My assignments are being eaten

By: Kelly Chia, Staff Writer Yes, yes, we’ve all heard the tales . . . seen how the darkness and the infinite turns of the...

September Bingo

By: Charlene Aviles, Staff Writer Plain text of bingo card: Got caught mimicking airbender moves outside lecture hall Couldn’t carry...

An essay by someone who never read the book

By: Craig Allan, SFU Student Frankenstein is about the monster Frankenstein who is created by a doctor, also named Frankenstein. Dr. Frankenstein puts together the...

Your SFU horoscopes September 13–19

By: Carter Hemion, Humour Editor ARIES: You’re a gas, but the things that fuel you might leave you a wreck. At least you’re driven, like...

The SUB be the worst undersea vessel ever created

By: Marco Ovies, Features Editor Call me Ishmael. Some semester ago — ne’er mind how long precisely — I thought I would sail about a...

SFU Student Updates: September 13–19

By: Sara Brinkac, Peak Associate and taken for granted Key Updates None of this means anything According to recent email metrics, 99.5% of SFU students either automatically delete...

SFU announces new eReader to replace textbooks

By: Craig Allan, SFU student In order to reduce the burden of books on students, SFU will now be requiring the use of e-books for...

My Dining Hall disaster

By: Tamanna T., Staff Writer My name is Hella Enderson, and this is the story of how a raccoon and I bonded over our love for...