Weirdest Library AskAway Asks

Sleep-deprived students making fantastic use of university services on AskAway

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Written by:  Tiffany Chang, Peak Associate 

We’ve all had those inevitable mental breakdowns when writing papers. These normally happen when we can’t find the articles we need and end up screaming at our computer screens. 

Everyone sometimes needs that extra help from those valiant heroes of SFU — the library AskAway chat operators. But what if our emotions were to get the best of us? What if we were to start telling them a little too much information? 

 

AskAway Live Chat at 3:00 AM

3:05 AM

HELP.

I know its really late and the chat service probably isn’t available, but I NEED HELP.

 

-Hello. What can I help you with?

 

CAN YOU SEND SOMEONE FROM THE LIBRARY TO KILL ME? I ALWAYS WAIT UNTIL THE LAST MINUTE TO START PAPERS,  I’M A MENACE TO SOCIETY THAT MUST LEAVE THIS WORLD! 

BTW I’m craving a burger really badly. Do you think it’s safe if I go to one of those 24-hour drive-thrus and pick up something?

 

-I always encourage students to start their papers at least two weeks in advance. And I wouldn’t go out this late if I were you.

 

Literally trying to ignore the hunger pains. Can you direct me to any database that might have journals even remotely related to what I’m writing about?

 

-Yes, of course. Could you tell me what your topic is?

 

Wait. Crap. What am I writing about again…?  

Oh yeah. How Modernism is constructed.

 

-Please give me a moment.

 

3:20 AM

-I was able to find a few that you might be of use to you: www.allthejournalsunistudentsneed.org and www.articlesthatarelikleytosaveyourlife.ca

-Are you there? I hope we’re still connected. 

 

Yup. Still here.

Thank you!

 

-You’re welcome.

 

I apologize for the delay. I couldn’t go another second without a cup of coffee. 

Hey, how many cups of coffee do you normally drink throughout the day? 

Is it more than 2? 

 

 

-I understand that it can be difficult at times as an undergraduate, but I strongly suggest you get as much rest as possible. 

 

Do you sleep for at least 8 hours a night? I got 4 last Tuesday! Feel great.

 

-I don’t mean to be rude, but I think we should stick to the task at hand here. 

-I hope I’ve helped. Do you have any other questions?

3:23 AM

 

I’m writing my introduction paragraph as we speak. Do you think you could talk me through the conclusion paragraph, though? I hate writing those. 

I decided to eat something else and my burger craving is gone. Are you hungry? If you need to take a break and grab a snack or something, I totally get it. 

 

-I’m fine, thank you. And I’m afraid it would be difficult to help you with your conclusion paragraph one-on-one through an online chat.

 

Yuck. I just sneezed on my laptop. Could you hold on a sec? I need to wipe my keyboard.

So, what do you do in your spare time? I really hope it isn’t staying at the library. 

 

-That’s a very offensive assumption… But thank you for using the AskAway online chat service. Have a nice day! 🙂

 

Thanks for the help! Do you want to do this again sometime? 

 

Chat is Disconnected 

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