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HIKE (A song parody of RENT)

Humour

Paying tuition will always suck, but at least we can sing about it!

Peak Web
Peak Web
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Photo curtesy of Rachael Garner

Written by: Taylor Wilkinson, Peak Associate

NEXT YEAR’S TUITION

[BEEDIE]

How do you learn to balance costs

With school fees getting even

Steeper these days

Deadlines, exam times

Blow my mind

And now this price hike

20% more you could pay?

Debt!

[SCIENCES]

How do you titrate solutions

With this talk of tuition

It ain’t like before it was priced all that fair

When the students are sour

Don’t feel we have power

Does this Board of Governors even care?

[BEEDIE]

Wish the tuition was frozen

[SCIENCES]

Some life that we’ve chosen!

[BEEDIE & SCIENCES]

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

Next year’s tuition!?

[EDUCATION]

How do you learn to teach

When you hear the Board’s speech

And it makes you wanna pull out your hair

[CRIMINOLOGY]

We’re told everyday ‘bout justice

But it feels like the truth is

This rise ain’t fair

[EDUCATION]

We’ll light up a mean blaze

[CRIMINOLOGY]

With our posters

[EDUCATION]

And essays

[BEEDIE, SCIENCES, EDUCATION & CRIM]

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

Next year’s tuition!?

[SIAT]

How do you design the next thing

When every semester

It’s “trick or treat”

And this time it’s “trick”

Code the next great app

But you feel like a sap

With this tuition hike crap

Got me thinking

“Should’ve gone to BCIT?”

[BEEDIE, to EDUCATION]

Who is he?

[SIAT]

Guys, I’m in Surrey.

[BEEDIE, SCIENCES, EDUCATION, CRIM & SIAT]

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

How we gonna pay

?

[PSYCHOLOGY]

Our protests ignite the night with passionate fire

[ENGLISH]

This narrative makes the flames grow with incendiary wit

[COMMUNICATIONS]

Take note as we burn this motion to the ground

Or else our debt will surely grow

[HISTORY]

How do you leave the past behind

When we see how it used to not be so hard

Baby Boomers say to suck it up and pay

In a town we can’t just afford

Debt!

[STUDENTS OF ALL FACULTIES]

How can you connect in an age

Where teachers, admins, directors,

Your own mental health betray?

What binds us all together

When the raging, rising price of school

That keeps chipping away?

[SFU ADMINISTRATION]

Get your degree in your hand,

And then make a stand!

[SCIENCES, to BEEDIE]

Use your debate skills to spar!

[BEEDIE, to SCIENCES]

Use your TI-84!

[ALL STUDENTS]

When they act tough

You call their bluff

[BEEDIE & SCIENCES]

We’re not gonna pay

[BEEDIE, SCIENCES, EDUCATION, CRIM & SIAT]

We’re not gonna pay

[ALL STUDENTS]

We’re not gonna pay

This price hike

Next price hike

Freeze the price

Tuition shouldn’t be this high

We’re not gonna pay this hike

‘Cause we have enough debt

 

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Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

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For promotional inquiries: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society

Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

For advertising inquiries: [email protected]
For promotional inquiries: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society