Stuff We Hate: Pollen
Picture this, okay, it’s summer. The birds are chirping, the air is clear and the sun is out with nary a cloud in the sky. A rolling wave of plant ejaculate wafts tenderly on the breeze — what. Pollen, as it’s better known, is nature’s cruelest joke on man. You see, plants have no game as far as, say, seducing and getting with the opposite plant sex. To combat this, they release as much plant sperm as they can in all directions in hopes of some of it making it into the right plant hoo-hah. Meanwhile I’m popping antihistamines like it’s PEZ. I mean, the botfly breeds in festering wounds of its host, and even that’s more appealing than the red-eyed, mouth-breathing drowsy monster that allergy season turns me into. Disgusting.
Stuff We Hate: First class of the semester
Alright class, welcome to 100 level course du jour. Now how many of you have ever heard of WebCT. Oop, looks like 3 of you didn’t raise your hands. Well, first you open a web browser. Any questions up to this point? Okay, then you’re going to want to click on the address bar and type double-u double-u double-u dot, actually on second thought, it’s probably easier if you google SFUWebCT. Here you’ll find an online copy of the syllabus, the same one I just handed out to you and will now read straight from for the next 45 minutes, aaand I see someone’s head has exploded in the back row, so I think that’s where I’ll end today’s lecture. This Wednesday’s lecture I’ll go over what an iclicker is.
