Peak associate
Horoscopes: July 25–31
July 28, 2022By: Hannah Kazemi, Peak Associate Aries You go to enroll and all of your courses are full except for one, so you choose three alternate courses that are not at all anything that you’re interested in. You suffer all semester, and end up with an even shittier enrollment date for the next one. Sucks to suck. Have fun in MACM 101! Taurus Somehow you always manage to get every class you want without having to waitlist, which by SFU standards, is magic. Gemini The stars are unsympathetic to your need to graduate. You come up with three possible…
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Horoscopes: June 27–July 3
June 27, 2022By: Max Lorette, Peak Associate and Local Mystic Aries: Has the stress of exams got you down, Aries? Do you feel stuck and exhausted? The stars have told me that you are overdue for a natural shower in the rain. Like…
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A Google Doc love story
June 22, 2022By: Maya Beninteso, Peak Associate and wannabe screenwriter Once upon a group project, two unsuspecting psychology students were placed in a group, encountered the usual group tension and, surprisingly, love. Twas not a meeting that involved bumping into each other (cutely)…
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Top ten ways to make a good impression on your TA
June 20, 2022By: Maya Beninteso, Peak Associate Tell them you’ve taken the class five times Brag about your unmatched experience with the course. After all, what’s more impressive than being extremely acquainted with the course content? The paper? Done it. The exam?…
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Horoscopes: June 6–12
June 6, 2022By: Max Lorette, Peak Associate Aries: The stars have informed me that it is a good idea for you to stay inside as much as possible this week. The cosmic forecast is calling for a killer sunburn on your horizon, and…
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Five exquisite ways to luxuriate in the dark academia aesthetic
June 3, 2022By: Max Lorette, Peak Associate and Portrait Holder of Dorian Gray Have you recently finished reading The Secret History by Donna Tartt? Has the slow ascension of summer made you yearn for the cool breeze of autumn? Do you revel in…
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Re: Are they incomplete assignments or just boundaries?
June 3, 2022By: Maya Beninteso, Peak Associate Dearest Professor, Thank you for your email. While your message says I haven’t completed the assignment, I counter that I’m merely asserting an emotional boundary. I don’t claim the assignment’s due date. I didn’t consent to…
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Forget owning a house, just build your own!
May 26, 2022By: Clarence Ndabahwerize, Peak Associate Victoria, BC — In light of the housing affordability crisis, policymakers from the Government of Canada pulled a bit of a Marie Antoinette by coming up with a subsidised chainsaw training program for young Canadians.…
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SFU’s parking lots, ranked
May 16, 2022By: Hannah Kazemi, Peak Associate and Parking Expert Central Parkade 42069/10. This lot will never let me down. My ride or die. My homie. My bae. Live, love, laugh, Central Parkade. I can always find a spot and it’s right in…
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Top ten ways to cope with the beginning of another semester
May 9, 2022By: Maya Beninteso, Peak Associate Denial What semester? This summer you’ll be tanning blissfully at the beach, laughing at the people signing up for another summer of the same school-related stress and poorly air-conditioned lecture halls. Instead of completing required…
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