HUMOUR
My mom made me break up with my watermelon toothpaste
October 12, 2023By: WatermelonToothpasteLover, SFU Student Disclaimer: I am not an employee of any toothpaste company, nor am I one of the 10 dentists who give out toothpaste recommendations. I am just a devastated student forced to side with the enemy. Recently, my mornings have gotten ten times worse. I wake up to my alarm, fall asleep, and repeat that process until the millionth alarm has pissed me off enough to get out of bed. I stand up and contemplate skipping class before heading to the bathroom. And there it is, sitting next to my sink. That red, blue, and white tube…
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Bargaining team brushing up on their stalling tactic skills
October 10, 2023By: Sude Guvendik, Staff Writer Ah, the sweet symphony of bureaucracy. It’s like a finely tuned orchestra playing the most annoying melody you’ve ever heard. As the TSSU battles it out for a fair contract, the employer’s bargaining team has…
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Horoscopes October 9 – 15
October 10, 2023By: Hana Hoffman, Peak Associate Aries March 21–April 19 Change your phone wallpaper to something that will yell at you to do work. How about a photo of Nicki Minaj with the caption, “Barbs stay in school!” Or a picture…
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A chat with our favourite advice columnist
October 6, 2023By: Saije Rusimovici, Staff Writer and C Icart, Humour Editor Dear Peakie, The other day, my friend asked me to close the blinds, revealing a very embarrassing truth about myself: I don’t know how blinds work. And can you blame…
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Horoscopes October 3 – 8
October 3, 2023By: Chloë Arneson, Peak Associate Aries March 21–April 19 Alright, Aries, it’s time to get your head in the game and narrow down this roster. You’ve been scouting all summer, and it’s time to start hosting tryouts. Playoffs are just…
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Me, and my incredible, cool, not bad, very good article titles have something to say
September 28, 2023By: Totally-Not-the-Editor-in-Chief On a bright Sunday afternoon, The Peak received this very strongly worded letter. In the words of George Orwell, or whatever: “Don’t be a hater.” We are sharing this letter as an example of what not to do,…
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A nightmare at the coffee shop
September 28, 2023By: Izzy Cheung, Staff Writer It was a hot summer’s day — everyone was flocking to the malls to enjoy the air conditioning and copious amounts of iced drinks when I got this order at the mall café. “Do you…
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Still using a backpack? Grow up!
September 28, 2023By: Cam Darting, SFU Student Hi, bestie! I’m your resident fashionista, and I am here to guide all you lost sheep on what to wear this season to look so incredibly expensive. You may think this is classist, but all…
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Canvas to ban phrases “I agree with you” and “jumping off what you just said”
September 26, 2023By: Chloe Arneson, Peak Associate SFU News —- In a groundbreaking move that’s set to change the way we communicate with our fellow students online, Canvas has unveiled its new chatbot to rid academia of dreaded copycat commenters. Are you…
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Are my devices allergic to Mr. Wi-Fi?
September 21, 2023By: Hailey Miller, Staff Writer Nothing irks me more than the good ol’ Wi-Fi signal fading in and out just as I’m about to log in to my Canvas account and prepare for class on campus. Mr. SFU Wi-Fi sure…
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