Home Blog Page 1393

Album review: Tiger Talk

0

 

By Benedict Reiners

Yukon Blonde’s acclaimed sound has jetpacked them across the border, and they’ve stopped only to fuel up on new tracks

Tiger Talk won’t contain any major surprises for those who have listened to the band’s previous work, but sometimes building on what you know is a better choice than starting something new, and Yukon Blonde’s second release marks an evolution to a more complex sound from their tried and true combination of energy and electric guitars.

The additional harmonies and further integration of acoustic stylings gives the listener a sense that the new tracks are more carefully planned out than their previous work. However, that fact may seem less surprising when you consider that their self-titled first album was recorded live-to-tape.

Cohesiveness lends itself to this more thought-out album, reflected heavily in “My Girl” and “Radio”, where the last few seconds of one carrying into the other. This also contributes to the continued theme of evolution, with each track seeming to build on the previous.

The lyrics of the album, though not usually particularly deep, lend themselves well to the music, as the vocals blend well with the instrumentals, while not being swallowed by them. The music is certainly catchy, and that seems to be what Yukon Blonde is going for, as they pull that feat off magnificently. The band has managed to make music that, makes you just want to be a part of it, whether that means belting along to the chorus of “Oregon Shores”, or dancing to the myriad of energetic songs.

All in all, Tiger Talk shows a band that knows where they’re going, and with it’s energy and dynamics, its music that demands attention. This isn’t music that you’ll be listening to while studying, but you will find few albums finer for when you’re in the mood to move.

Tiger Talk will be released March 20, and is currently streaming on Paste Magazine.

Pitcher-perfect week for Lukawesky

0

By Adam Ovenell-Carter

It was a good week for Cara Lukawesky. In a three day span, the star pitcher for the Clan softball team set a career-high in strikeouts with 10, pitched her first career no-hitter, and earned GNAC pitcher of the week for the second time this season. An impressive series of accomplishments at any time, but after a sub-par week from her beforehand, the feats were all the more welcomed.

The festivities began with a 9–2 victory over Northwest Nazarene University, the first of four straight meetings between the Clan and the Crusaders. Lukawesky went the distance in the matchup, though she did get off to a shaky start. After giving up two runs in the first inning, it looked like the losses from the week prior might have continued to mount. Instead, Lukawesky turned her performance — and the game — around quickly. She shut out NNU the rest of the game, striking out eight Crusaders over the next six innings. She had plenty of run support, but her stellar pitching didn’t require much help from her teammates.

“Cara got off to a rough start but she settled down and turned in a great performance,” said head coach Mike Renney. “Northwest Nazarene is a tough and scrappy team that wouldn’t go away,” he continued, but Lukawesky’s performance in the first contest of the four-game series was almost enough in itself.

Lukawesky would take the field again in the team’s third consecutive matchup, after number-two pitcher Kelsie Hawkins pitched a complete game herself in a 2–0 win in the second game of the series. Not to be outdone by her teammate’s shutout game, the Clan ace improved on her 10-strikeout performance by throwing the first no-hitter of her career. She pitched seven strikeouts in the Clan’s 6–0 win, her eighth win of the season. Again, six runs from the offense will keep a team in almost any game, but Lukawesky’s pitching didn’t require much help on the scoreboard. Over her 14 innings in the two games she played, Lukawesky allowed just four hits while striking out 17 Crusader batters.

Her hitless game set the tone for the Clan’s next game, as the team took the fourth contest 7–1, sweeping the series on the back of incredible pitching from both Lukawesky and Hawkins.

“I think any team in the conference would like to get two pitching performances like we got,” said Renney. And as brilliant as she was, Lukawesky wasn’t about to take much credit whatsoever.

“The team played great today,” she said. “My catcher [Brittany Ribeiro] called a great game and I was hitting my spots. The no-hitter was really just a combination of Brittany calling a great game and the defense playing well behind me.”

Despite her humility, she was named the GNAC pitcher of the week for the second time this season, while her no-hitter was the first seven-inning no-hitter in the GNAC since 2005. As hard as she tries to deflect the praise, it’s hard to deny her incredible play when there’s plenty of evidence to back it up.

And of course, it helps when the offense outscores the opposition 24–3 over four games.

After dropping three of their previous four, the quick and impressive turnaround from the Clan is a promising indication of the character the squad preached before the season. With a series of tough matchups ahead, the Clan look to be back on track, thanks in large part to the stellar play of their ace pitcher.

End of the road

0

By Adam Ovenell-Carter

For many, sports are not much more than a hobby, or something to keep you fit or active — heck, baseball’s even known as America’s national pastime. But for these three Clan seniors, sports — basketball, in particular — have been much, much more, and for quite some time.

“I’ve been playing basketball since I was three,” said Justin Brown. “I played every sport you could think of when I was a kid. I played baseball and soccer, but when soccer went out the window I started playing football. I just stuck with basketball, so here I am now.”

“Here”, would be graduating from the Clan basketball program, though the Cal-Poly transfer still has a year of school left.

“My parents would kill me if I didn’t get my degree,” laughed Brown. “Really though, I know I’m pushing for something, and I think I have my basketball career to thank for that.

“School’s not easy, but playing basketball here as made it easier. I think that speaks to [head coach James] Blake’s influence, and to the guys like the two sitting
next to me.”

Those two guys would be Zack Frehlick and Connor Lewis, fellow graduands from the program who also share an athletic upbringing.

“My dad played basketball for UVic,” added Lewis, who transferred to SFU from Capilano when the Clan went NCAA. “Basketball has always been a part of my life, but I did try out a lot of different sports. It was probably not until grade nine that I realized that if I was going to move on with any one sport, it was going to be basketball.”

Frehlick’s journey here was similar to Lewis’s.

“My family is a huge sports family,” said fifth-year senior Frehlick. “My dad was an Olympian in volleyball, and my grandpa was an Olympian in track and field.

“I didn’t really have a choice,” he laughed, “it’s just part of my makeup. I played a lot of different sports growing up, but basketball was the one I fell in love with.”

That love for the game was no doubt one of the reasons these three, and the rest of their teammates, got through an unbelievably bizarre and truly unique season. Unfortunately, however, it was so for all the wrong reasons. The Clan entered the season with 18 players on their roster, but finished with just seven able to play. Be it freak injuries or academic issues, the Clan faced problems you probably wouldn’t wish on your biggest rival.

“What happened, happened,” said Brown. “I like to think it happened for the best.”

“We started off with 18 talented players, but we lacked cohesion, and there were some outliers,” added Frehlick, “but as we lost guys, we came closer together, even with less talent on the floor, and that’s something we can be proud of.”

A transition to a new league, let alone the NCAA, is never an easy task; this year’s unforeseeable hits to the lineup only compounded that matter. As some of the most experienced athletes on the team, the three seniors naturally played a big part in that transition, especially as Lewis and Brown were brought in during the team’s changeover. Still, they were quick to give much of the credit to their head coach.

“We had four returning players when we first went NCAA. It hasn’t been easy, but Blake has done a lot to smooth things over,” said Frehlick, who’d been with the Clan for three years before the transition to the American league.

“Even on the court, he [Blake] has taught us more than just basketball skills,” added Lewis. “He’s taught us leadership, commitment, and everything we need to be successful in life after basketball.

“I think we owe a lot to him ,actually,” said Brown. “He’s just a good person to be around, and that makes him a better coach. It makes it easier to listen to everything he says, and you just love playing for him.”

I  think it’s already been stressed enough how important that passion is.

“We enjoyed going out and fighting for each other,” said Lewis. “Even though our record doesn’t necessarily show it, we did some amazing things.

“When we lost guys, we had other guys step up. Look at Chris [Evans] and Nickolay [Georgiev], they were both walk-ons and they did some great things. I think as the leaders on this team, we can be proud of them.” And that’s just one of the many things these three can be happy about as they leave the program.

Asked Brown, “We had what, three wins last year? This year we had eight, and it might not look like a lot to everyone on the outside looking in, but we know it means a lot. There’s still a ton of talent here, and the guys who missed this year will be back to improve that win total. The cupboards aren’t bare.”

“The way we represented ourselves, our school, we’re proud of what we’ve done here,” said Frehlick. “The guys here are like family now, and that won’t change.

“I’m grateful for everything I had here,” he continued, and that statement was met with smiles and nods from both Brown and Lewis.

When you boil it down, Brown, Lewis, and Frehlick aren’t much more than three twenty-somethings who just love to play a game. Maybe that was what they were when they started here, but thanks to an almost unfair amount of adversity thrown their way, and the help of a personable coach, they exit the program with heads on their shoulders and as part of a lifelong family.

“It’s been a good journey,” said Lewis, but one that, at least for now, has come to an end.

A ‘Melo end to Linsanity

0

By Adam Ovenell-Carter

When several players from the New York Knicks went down, a no-name rookie unexpectedly led the Knicks on a 6-1 tear — notably in the absence of ‘star’ player Carmelo Anthony. That rookie, of course, would be Jeremy Lin, and with his compelling underdog story, Lin brought a lot of positive publicity to a team in dire need of it. Unfortunately the Knicks still have a few hurdles to cross, and one of their biggest obstacles is Lin’s teammate and star player Carmelo Anthony.

Anthony is the big man on campus, so to speak, to whom James Dolan, the owner of the New York Knicks, owes $85 million over the next four years. Anthony’s groin injury put him out of commission for seven games, paving the way for Linsanity. In his absence, the Knicks built up positive chemistry and relied mainly on Lin for offence. And, upon Anthony’s return to the Knicks on February 20, the Knicks lost to the New Jersey Nets 100–92. While the team would naturally need time to adjust after playing — and winning — without Carmelo for a considerable amount of time, Lin still managed to score 10 points more than Anthony in his return.

That was February 20, and now almost one month later, there is still no chemistry between the two despite the fact that there are no particular hard feelings between them, or so they claim. The main problem remains that they are simply unable to play together. Both are strong offensively, but it seems that Anthony is unable to accept a rookie like Lin getting an equal amount of playing time, as well as the confidence of the rest of the team. Given Anthony’s reputation as an over-confident ball hog, this equality thing can’t be good for his ego. When his ego isn’t being fed on time, then everyone around him is likely suffering the consequences.

There’s no doubt that Carmelo Anthony has skill. Even former Nuggets GM Kiki Vandeweghe, who once employed Anthony, once claimed that he “can score from anywhere, on anybody.” But basketball is not a one-man sport; harmonious team work is essential and Anthony is clearly a pitch or two off. People have called him everything from an “arrogant hoodlum” to an all-time “ball stopper”, all of which suggest that Carmelo is no team player. Since his return to New York’s lineup, the Knicks are actually playing better on both sides of the ball when Anthony is warming the bench, rather than trying to sweep the courts.

To compound the matter, Knicks head coach Mike D’Antoni resigned last week, not willing to cater to the controversial Anthony. The marriage was doomed to fail
from the start.

Anthony prefers a slower tempo where he can thrive in isolation while D’Antoni is noted for his free-wheeling up-tempo coaching style. Anthony and D’Antoni were never going to work together; it was clear one had to leave, and it clearly wasn’t going to be the guy with $85 million left on his contract. Rick Carlisle, the current head coach of the Dallas Mavericks and one of the only 11 people ever to win an NBA championship as both a player and a coach, has asserted on numerous occasions that D’Antoni is a guru in terms of managing a team’s offense. Carlisle reportedly claimed that Mike D’Antoni was “the best coach of point guards in the last decade”, which explains Lin’s success. D’Antoni’s system created an environment in which Lin was able to thrive and play at his best. With him gone, it is uncertain whether a new coach will even give Lin the same court time, let alone design plays for him.

Anthony’s return, and subsequent resignation of D’Antoni, leaves far more questions than answers. In the current situation where Anthony seems to lack chemistry with virtually every person on his team, would the Knicks be better off without him? If the Knicks play better with Carmelo warming the bench, as the statistics would suggest they do, then he also probably isn’t as valuable to the team as he thinks he is. Anthony seems to have single handedly negated every bit of hope that Lin was able to shine on the Knicks, and with a little over a month left to move up from ninth in the Eastern Conference and into playoff contention, a discordant team, and no coach — is it too late to undo the damage?

Canuck Killers

0

By Adam Ovenell-Carter

Thanks to Bill Shakespeare — and more recently, George Clooney — the ides of March are a well-known time of the year. Apparently, we’re meant to be wary of it, but as a hockey fan, one can’t help but look forward to it. As the calendar hits mid-March, playoff races are in full swing, and each game means so much. Save for the playoffs themselves, there is no more exciting time in hockey. At the time of publication, Colorado is clinging to the eighth and final playoff berth in the West, but by the time you read this, they could be as high as sixth or as low as 11th. The day after that, well, who knows?

Currently, the Vancouver Canucks have a firm hold on the second seed in the Western Conference, but are in a race of their own. They have a shot at retaking the number-one spot, but they appear to be content just coasting into the post-season (much to the ire of Canuck fans the world over). It would take a catastrophic collapse for them to miss the playoffs at this point, but with such a logjam between the five or six teams hovering around that eighth seed, it would be frivolous to predict the Canucks first-round opponent. It really doesn’t matter if the Canucks finish first or second, because who finishes seventh or eighth could be determined on the final day of the season.

With that in mind, here are the three teams that would likely give the Canucks the most trouble should they meet come the ides of April.

 

3. Calgary Flames

Regardless of where these two teams are in the standings, neither has ever had a decisive edge over the other in head-to-head matchups.

The Flames had been riding the consistently stellar play of goaltender Miikka Kiprusoff until a few weeks ago, when the whole team seemingly caught fire (pardon the pun). Kiprusoff is still playing fantastically, and he’s capable of bringing an offensively starved team within a goal of the Stanley Cup. Of course, Calgary is a much different team than they were in 2004, but one thing that hasn’t changed, aside from their goalie’s play, is that of their captain. Jarome Iginla, a notoriously slow starter, was a focal point of trade rumours early in the season. Now, however, he’s on top of his game and is playing some of his best hockey of the past few seasons.

The Flames are hot, led by a star goalie and a surging captain. They always seem to get up for matchups against their divisional rival, and always have a chance to beat them.

 

2. Chicago Blackhawks

Really, who wouldn’t want this matchup again? Hawks’ captain Jonathan Toews has had some post-concussion complications, but there’s no denying the rivalry these two teams share.

The Blackhawks currently sit in the sixth seed, but are perilously close to falling down to seventh (or worse), but have all the right tools to go far in the playoffs (again), though they do lack a top-tier goaltender. Still, they have Patrick Kane, Duncan Keith, and Dave Bolland, all notorious Canuck-killers — and that’s excluding Toews. These two teams played one of the most exciting and memorable playoff series of the past few years, and most would kill to have it again — but it almost goes without saying that a matchup against the Hawks could spell danger for the Canucks.

 

1. Phoenix Coyotes

The Canucks lost to the Bruins last year because they couldn’t beat a hot goalie and were stifled by a stingy defensive team. They struggled to put away Nashville for many of the same reasons. Nashville wasn’t as deep offensively as Boston, and that naturally played into Vancouver’s favour, but still played Vancouver to one of the most even six-game series ever.

Phoenix is more like Nashville. They score by committee, play a suffocating defensive game, and have a goaltender playing pretty well in Mike Smith — all of which are factors that would be the bane of an offensive team like Vancouver. Two of the matchups between the teams ended as 2–1 finals, both in shootouts, speaking volumes about Phoenix’s ability to slow any game to a halt.

Vancouver thrives when playing an exciting, up-tempo brand of hockey. Take that away from them, and it could spell the Canucks’ undoing should the two teams meet early in April’s playoffs.

Residence needs more robust composting

0

By Thomas Booker

Behind the residence dining hall there is a solitary green wheelie bin into which a handful of eager students dispose of their compost. This one small bin is underused and rarely full. Many of the students living in residence are not even aware that composting facilities exist on campus. As part of a class conservation project, I decided to look into ways to get students to use these facilities more.
Composting, the breaking down of organic material into nutrient rich soil, is a sustainable waste management practice many perform at home. By composting you allow nutrients to be returned to soils that will use them, rather than taking up room in landfills.
Although I have been living in residence since September, when I began this project I was completely unaware that SFU even offered any composting services. In this I was not alone. A survey that I sent out to my fellow residents shows that 81 per cent of students living in residence were not aware of the opportunity for composting facilities.
I sent out a survey to as many residents as I could. The results showed a shocking lack of awareness of the composting program, with 81 per cent of respondents saying that they did not know about the composting facilities. However, this does not imply that SFU students are unwilling to compost. In fact the opposite seems to be true with an overwhelming 81 per cent of students saying that they would be happy to participate in a more user-friendly composting program. But for those students living in townhouses and those residences not so close to the dining hall, taking out the compost is a pain.
One of the remits of SFU residence is to be as sustainable as possible. Reducing the amount of waste being sent to landfills and incinerators is an easy and efficient way to help achieve this goal. Because of the concentration on sustainability SFU has installed recycling bins alongside the garbage cans in residences equipped with kitchens and they are regularly collected. The logical thing to do would be to supply kitchens with a composting bin and have the compost taken out with the garbage. Currently this is done in an opt-in system but students, being what they are, rarely do this.
There is an initiative set up by Sustainable SFU, the Zero Waste Initiative, which is doing a damn fine job. They are responsible for the compost bins that are now at the food outlets on campus, but it seems that SFU residence and the rest of SFU operate in relative isolation of one another so integrating the two has proven difficult.
For now my goal is to get more people composting in residence by increasing awareness of the facilities. Perhaps if enough people show that they are willing and want to compost, SFU residence will rethink their position and provide more accessible and user-friendly composting facilities. Until that point, SFU residents who would like to compost must take their (and perhaps floormates’) compost to the bin themselves. For anyone who needs a compost bucket, Booster Juice in Cornerstone has agreed to provide them free of charge or you could use any old Tupperware or pail. Alternatively you can buy one from Reslife for $12, along with bags for $5.
Obviously there will always be some people who will take out their compost regardless of the distance involved, perhaps even other people’s too, but the sustainability of SFU residences should not rest on the shoulders of those long-suffering, sandal-wearing folk.

Fraser International College’s creeping boundaries

0

By Michael McDonell

Since 2006, a spectre has haunted SFU. No, it isn’t the spectre of international communism, it’s actually the opposite — creeping privatization, as exemplified by the Fraser International College (FIC).

FIC has steadily grown on the southeastern part of campus, located in the Discovery Research Park near to the University Industry Liaison Office, and Environmental Health and Safety, but it remains non-existent or invisible to most students. It is very out of the way, but can be reached by going along University Drive East or walking from South Campus Road. The goal of FIC is to prepare students, the vast majority of whom pay bloated international student fees, for completing a degree at SFU. However, unlike the SFU governance structure that includes faculty and students on various committees and decision-making bodies, FIC is accountable only to shareholders and the university administration.

I worry that international education is becoming an exclusive jet-setting credential, rather than a transformative experience open to all. I also worry that the profits accrued from FIC are being used to mask the effects of provincial funding cuts to public education on the quality of our education.

As a university transfer program for SFU’s growing international student population, FIC claims to enroll more than 1,300 students every semester from across the world. Enrollment has increased dramatically from 85 students in 2006, and SFU is trying to draw in students from countries other than China, which has so far dominated the demographics of FIC (not to mention recently signing an agreement with the board of governors). FIC thus potentially contributes to making a more diverse student experience on campus. As previously reported by The Peak, FIC renewed its contract with SFU in 2010 and will offer courses and programs until 2020. No one knows how much FIC will expand over the coming years.

A prep school allowing students to transfer directly to SFU after a year or two of study somewhat justifies FIC’s location on campus, since it allows students to become more familiar with aspects of SFU, such as how the library works and other good things. It also addresses the fact that there are numerous college transfer programs at smaller institutions in the lower mainland, but not ones that international students may seek out or know about. FIC offers Stage I (pre-university) transfer programs for $13,976 over two semesters, and offers Stage II (university-level) UTP’s in business administration, engineering science, computing science, and arts and social sciences, among other disciplines. On paper, FIC appears to be justified.

Unlike SFU however, Fraser International College is owned by a private, for-profit multinational corporation, based out of Australia. So far, FIC has arranged for courses to be taught by every faculty, and almost every department, with the exception of Sociology/Anthropology, which has questioned the presence of this public-private partnership. Most departments have bowed to pressure from the university administration to offer materials, consultation, and even instructors to FIC to boost enrollments and thus secure continued university funding.

Every semester at Burnaby, the section dedicated to FIC gets larger, as they offer more courses outside the democratic control of curriculum and appointment committees, and of direct accountability to departments, faculty, and students. While this is a P3 agreement, the logic of privatization and the profit-motive looms large, and FIC could be the tip of the iceberg in terms of privatization.

Students at Fraser International College, like all international students, pay exorbitant tuition fees for their education. While SFU’s student paid $163.80 per normal course unit this Spring, FIC students pay $546.34 (soon to be raised by $27 per unit), depending on their program, a figure that is even more than what international students normally pay. Because they do not choose the exact number of credit hours they enroll in, they pay a per-term athletics and recreation fee of $125, while an SFU student taking three courses pays about 60% of that.

International education is a worthwhile pursuit that should be encouraged by universities around the world, as SFU has done by bringing in over 13 per cent of its enrollment from abroad. However, prices like these ensure that this credential will only be available to the upper-middle classes who can afford such education and the cultural and social benefits it adds to  their social mobility. It also makes computers and study spaces less available to students, the latter a major justification for spending $65 million on a new student union building.

Furthermore, while the university administration is not supposed to profit off of international students fees or rely on them for funding its operations, it is de facto heading in this direction by receiving rent equal to a third of tuition revenue at FIC, and, with, its 2011 agreement with the Chinese Scholarship Council, to send 20 top graduate students to SFU every year from elite Chinese universities. Ordinary students pay increased tuition fees and have high student loan interest rates, while international students themselves are milked for revenue.

The Simon Fraser Student Society, meanwhile, has said very little on what this development means for public education or student experiences on campus. If our goal is to create community, it makes no sense to give up space that could be used by students for what amounts to an export processing zone for educational commodification. This has not been an issue on campaign platforms. Nor has it been a major subject at SFSS all-candidates debates, where the main subject seems to be, how can we run our non-profit student society using for-profit methods, and still claim democratic legitimacy in doing so. This is partly because Fraser International College keeps itself hidden on the eastern part of campus near UniverCity, and keeps adding enrollment every year in such a way that we don’t notice.

But we have reached a turning point where quantitative accumulation has produced qualitative change: the good potential has been outweighed by the bad actuality. We have to take a stand in defending public education rather than allowing this wave of neoliberal privatization to continue indefinitely.

Board unqualified to make SUB plans

0

By Benjamin Lee

The proposed SFSS student union building is an extravagant $65-million luxury that students ought to critically inquire, and despite an ongoing period of fiscal restraint across Canada, a referendum question has been presented to fund the SUB exclusively through student levies.

Since there are no initial and startup funds available from the university or province of B.C. to assist in funding of the SUB, the SFSS board is turning to students to foot a 30-year open-ended bill, beginning in 2014. Upon the success of the referendum, the SFSS board claims they will reach out to the university and the provincial government; my concern is there would be no incentives to do so, because there is no need for the SFSS to “stay hungry,” especially when the funds are guaranteed each semester and will increase each year.

However, this SFSS board will stay foolish. Despite there being five business students on the 14-member SFSS board; they have presented a spectacularly unsophisticated fundraising strategy. Look at the Build SFU website: why isn’t there a PayPal link that would encourage the SUB’s early supporters to make an initial contribution? There is no outreach strategy to prominent SFU alumni to earn their endorsement of the SUB, which would, frankly, impart credibility. There is no mention of any joint partnerships between current donors to SFU and the SFSS to partner in fundraising. Why isn’t there an initial fundraising cap, say $2—3 million from investors, before proceeding to ask the student body for money? Build SFU’s justification is that they have consulted for six years, but this due diligence has not been accorded to fundraising for the $65-million SUB. The SFSS may not be shy asking students for money, but I would bet on a more embarrassing reaction if they had the gall to approach the CBC Dragons.

Let’s examine the authority of the SFSS board to manage a $65-million project. SFSS directors are elected to one-year terms, make under $100,000 (actually they make between $20,000 to $30,000), but somehow feel they are competent in making million-dollar decisions — how can they fully appreciate the significance of $3 million, $3.5 million and $35 million, when they themselves have never earned such an amount? Rather, a $12 burger and $800 monthly rent are expenses that resonate with everyday students; it raises the question: how deeply out of touch is the SFSS board?

Is this the realization of fiscal responsibility that the SFSS board campaigned on in the last election? To date, there is little praise associated with the current SFSS board, except their delicious hypocrisy in locking out the society’s staff for three months, citing the society was in a deficit of $800,000, yet during the lockout, the board raised their own wages! Furthermore, the SFSS has called on DSUs and clubs to endure cuts, but the board remains unwilling to face fiscal restraint themselves. Perhaps, the SFSS should fix their own affairs, before going to students for help.

From March 20 to 22, think twice, but vote once.

 

Hockey fans are brainwashed

2

By Ryan McLaughlin

 

I’m sorry to start an off with a piece of such unsavory news, but it’s best to say quickly, like tearing off a Band-Aid. We live in a totalitarian state. I know this is depressing to hear, especially since you planned on thinking freely later this afternoon, but the fact is we live in a state where the minds of its citizenry have been hopelessly and irreversibly brainwashed. You might ask who the culprit of this indoctrination is. Is it a sinister U.S. government with plans to crush Wikileaks and implement dastardly legislation like SOPA?  Or perhaps an evil corporation like Monsanto somehow putting brain altering chemicals in our drinking water?

No, I’m afraid the best brainwasher is the one you suspect least of all: it’s the institution of hockey in Canadian culture. That’s right, if you enjoy watching hockey then it’s quite likely you’ve been indoctrinated and may suffer from some form of permanent brain damage. The first step to recovery is accepting your beliefs are false. Try repeating in your head, “Hockey is boring and only crazy people enjoy it”, until you feel the delusion leave your mind.

You may not want to hear this, but living in a society of mass sports is really no different than living in Nazi Germany; in fact, both ideologies actually had similar beginnings. Mass sports came about in Europe and North America in the early 20th century as a response to fears that society was becoming weak and feminized. Men felt the need to prove their masculinity and increasingly began watching sports like hockey.

Like the Nazi, the hockey fan is driven by his desire to preserve his masculinity and to create a society of new-men: emotionless, aggressive, and able to take a puck in the grapes without as much so a grimace.

Like any successful totalitarian ideology, the hockey team begins by attacking the minds of the young. Children are swiftly taken from their mothers and their Pokemon and forced into strict, early morning hockey practices where they are taught to love the hockey team like a family. They are given trading cards to collect and when they get home, they watch hockey on the television with their parents. They wear identical uniforms to remove their individuality and liken themselves to a cog in the machine. Uniqueness is considered contrary to the hockey doctrine. I don’t think there is much doubt regarding the similarities between Tim Bits Hockey and the Hitler Youth.

Once grown up, hockey fans serve one god and one god only: hockey. Always at war, these militarists are easily stirred into a hateful fervor against the enemy, whoever that may be. Like in George Orwell’s novel, Nineteen Eighty-Four, where the state continually switches between which nations it is at war with, the hockey team is always fighting a different opponent. This keeps hockey fans in a state of perpetual fear and renders them incapable of critical thinking. In Orwell’s book, citizens practice the act of “doublethink”, which allows a person to both love and hate Big Brother. Canucks fans will recognise this practice with their attitude toward the team’s bi-polar goalie, Roberto Luongo.

The Mass Sports ideology has eyes and ears everywhere. If a citizen discovers a subversive element in their midst, that person is rounded up and dealt with severely. Like in Nazi Germany, the Mass Sports ideology gathers supporters in the beer halls to watch the games. If you happen to be an innocent patron simply there to get your drank on, you must suffer the noises of the unruly crowd or else leave the pub and risk not getting sufficiently slizzered. Like the Nazis, the hockey fans occasionally arrange a putsch where they exit the beer hall and try to violently overthrow the municipal government. Vancouver residents recently witnessed an attempt at a coup d’état last spring.

Of course, all authoritarian governments employ the use of slogans and imagery to stir the public into a rage, and the Mass Sports culture is not different. While the Nazis had the black eagle, the Canucks have the killer whale. The Leninists declared “Peace, Land, and Bread” while the Canucks yell “Go, Canucks, Go”. The parallels are uncanny.

Canadians are in the grip of an extreme regime — if you question the authority, you are ostracised and outcast, or worse. Vancouverites must find the courage to throw off the shackles of oppression and free their minds from hockey’s insidious grip. Perhaps only then can we begin to heal as a nation and as a people.

To be Woo-ed and not made to Woo

0

By Will Ross

When it comes to approaches to filmmaking, it’s difficult to think of more dissimilar approaches than those of Alfred Hitchcock and John Woo. Hitchcock cared exclusively about his character’s psychologies and little for the spectacle of their adventures; Woo elaborates and emphasizes the latter almost entirely at the expense of the former. So it may seem odd for John Woo to have remade the Hitchcock film Notorious, and even odder that he did so in the context of an existing franchise with Mission: Impossible 2.

Both plots involve a suave spy as a male lead (Cary Grant in Notorious, Tom Cruise in M:I-2), who attempts to bring down an “enemy of freedom” (a Nazi and an ex-U.S. agent, respectively), by recruiting a female lead with whom the villain was once in love (a drunk Ingrid Bergman/a thief, Thandie Newton), to seduce them and act as an informant. The spy and his informant fall in love, forming an espionage love triangle.

Mission: Impossible 2 has a limited reputation as a remake because when we watch movies plot is less important to us than the style and approach to storytelling. For instance, consider two versions of the scene wherein the male lead reveals his status and power to his prospective informant. In Notorious, Bergman drunkenly drives Cary Grant home after the party at which they met. Grant grins to placate her, even as she accelerates to his private discomfort.  When she is pulled over, he simply shows the officer his credentials and gets her off the hook. The whole scene is played with rear screen projection, that old technique where the car is placed in front of a screen playing footage of a road, and the driver pretends to drive. It’s not very convincing, but the focus is their dialogue and reactions. Grant nervously glances at the speedometer; Bergman resents his patronizing attitude and deliberately unsettles him: “I don’t like gentlemen who grin at me.”

The same scene in M:I-2 has them driving in separate cars on the edge of a dangerous canyon road. Cruise follows Newton’s car, and she accelerates to escape him while endangering herself and other drivers. Cruise follows her, nervous but determined. When Newton ends up dangling over a cliff, Cruise pulls her to safety. Then they make out.

I’m not here to say M:I-2 is stupid and Notorious is smart. Okay, it’s true, but my point is that story and character-wise the same things are going on in this scene: The female quarry resents the male’s attempts to possess her, and tries to reassert herself by toying with death at high speed. The male reluctantly follows before saving her at the last minute. The scenes aren’t different because John Woo changes it to a car chase; they’re different because he doesn’t give a shit about any of that character stuff. The cinematography’s aim is to stylize the bashing, zooming, spinning cars as much as possible. Hitchcock didn’t care about high speed driving, he cared about what it revealed about his characters. That’s why he didn’t worry about the fake-y rear projection, and sure enough, while watching we quickly forget all about it. This is why the common notion that Hollywood has ‘run out of stories’ never struck me as a real problem: which story is told doesn’t matter nearly as much as how it’s told.