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The Lumberjanes are on the case

By
EIC
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Photo courtesy of Boom! Studios.
Photo courtesy of Boom! Studios.
Photo courtesy of Boom! Studios.

For those at Miss Quinzella Thiskwin Penniquiqul Thistle Crumpet’s Camp for Hardcore Lady Types, strange supernatural creatures have been afoot. Three-eyed foxes are lurking in the night, serpent monsters have been spotted in the river, and a Yeti has been seen wearing a Walkman. But fear not; the Lumberjanes are on the case.

Lumberjanes follows the hilarious and action-packed misadventures of five best friends at an all-girls summer camp. Taken aback by unexplainable happenings in their campsite, this gang of feisty butt-kickers decides to investigate, much to the displeasure of their incessantly irate scout leader. Jo, April, Mal, Molly, and Ripley set out on a magical quest tackling everything from secret caves to arm-wrestling stone golems, all whilst accumulating scout badges as they go.

Noelle Stevenson and Grace Ellis weave an enjoyable tale packed with non-stop hilarity. Every page is bursting at the seams with jokes and gags, enough to keep a perpetual smile on your face.

This lovable gang of misfits is a riot from start to finish. While the characters have eccentric personalities, they are also jam-packed with heart and soul. Each of theLumberjanes is strong on their own, but together this ensemble succeeds where most fail. At its core,Lumberjanes is a story about friendship and comradery, and thankfully this is never forgotten amidst the many calamities they face together.

Brooke Allen knocks it out of the park and plays perfectly off the creative energy of both Stevenson and Ellis. Her bright and colorful panels are a treat for the eyes. The cartoon style rendering of the world of Lumberjanes is reminiscent of old school Saturday morning cartoons. What the artworks lack in intricate detail, they make up for with a vibrant panel layout. Rest assured, no page in this series is ever boring to look at or rendered the same twice.

In a time where the outcry for strong female characters has never been louder, Lumberjanes succeeds in introducing audiences to a new cast of leading ladies for the next generation. They have the potential to be strong figures in the pantheon of graphic novels, and I sincerely hope they continue to stock the stands for years to come. 

Lumberjanes is a graphic novel that can be enjoyed by people of all ages. It’s a wonderful homage to the old school Saturday morning cartoons of the ‘90s and ‘00s. So take a seat and get acquainted with the genre’s new leading ladies. Kick off the summer with a read that packs a hell of a supernatural wallop.

Scientology is exposed in Going Clear

By
EIC
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0
Photo courtesy of Jigsaw Productions.
Photo courtesy of Jigsaw Productions.
Photo courtesy of Jigsaw Productions.

Everyone has a need to find a sense of purpose in what can sometimes seem a meaningless world. Alex Gibney’s Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief, an exposé of the sins of the Church of Scientology, displays this point in almost every moment — whether that be through the founder L. Ron Hubbard’s search for wealth in creating a religion or the fact that Dianetics (a set of ideas and practices regarding the metaphysical relationship between the mind and body) caught on with so many baby boomers so fast at the time of Scientology’s inception.

For all his wacko ideas, Hubbard, a pulp sci-fi writer, understood the human condition and how he could cash in on our fears and anxieties. The problem is, the film suggests, that no matter how much time and money Scientologists give to the church, they still remain broken and depressed.

Going Clear has an amazingly ironic title. For Scientologists, the term “Clear” is assigned to the highest members of the church who have walked their way all the way up “The Bridge to Total Freedom” to become an  “operating thetan” (OT). At these superlative stages of OT, one is supposed to be free of any engrams — reoccurring bad memories from the past that are the cause of depression and the reason we can’t realize our full potential. 

Gibney’s title is impeccably clever because he shows that the more people go up the ladder, the more dysfunctional and less clear they actually become. The irony is that the only way to fully go clear is to break free from the restrictions of the church entirely.

If you found these last paragraphs dense with lingo, you have little idea what you’re in for. Going Clear is an emotionally powered composition that compactly chronicles Scientology’s origin in the science-fiction of its founder L. Ron Hubbard all the way to the current corruption under Ben Miscavige’s leadership.

High-profile members who have left the church like Crash director Paul Haggis and senior executive Mike Rinder are interviewed and poignantly share the deplorable actions that were done to them and that they did to others. What makes this film more than just cold visual journalism, though, is the regret expressed by the interviewees, and the pain they now experience, as many of them have been disowned and alienated from their families.

Going Clear is not nearly as artful as the recent Kurt Cobain: Montage of Heck in its use of documentary form, but what this film offers is more of an emotionally-charged journalism. There is nothing inventive with regards to how the film is put together — an assemblage of talking heads, old interviews, news footage, and simplistic visual reenactments — but it serves the educational purpose as it neatly and concisely expresses Gibney’s messages.

What makes the film exceptional is how coherently it teaches an enormous amount of information in two very short hours to an audience that could know very little about Scientology.

Before seeing Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief, I had little knowledge of Scientology. I came out with an understanding of why Hubbard created the religion and why so many people joined him, but I still don’t understand how any Scientologists will be able to leave the film still devout.

Let’s face it

By
EIC
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0

Let's Face It (by Hans Jungmann)

Muppet films and specials you may have forgotten about

By
EIC
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0
Photo courtesy of Cultjer
Photo courtesy of Cultjer
Photo courtesy of Cultjer

With everybody’s favourite felted hooligans returning to television this fall on ABC — and a new trailer just released last week — we’re looking back at some of the Muppets’ wackiest adventures. Do you remember watching any of these hilarious Jim Henson productions when you were younger?

Marvel’s The Muppets

The Muppets Take on Global Warming

The Muppets Present the Internet

The Muppets’ Animal Farm

2 Fast 2 Muppets

Andy Warhol and the Muppets’ Holiday Special

The Muppets: The New Class

The Great Muppet Depression

Muppet Classic Improv Theatre

The Muppets Go to North Korea

Muppets from Under the Crawlspace

The Great Gonzo Gatsby

Muppets Treasure Pacific Trash Vortex

The Muppets Learn How to Evenly Split a Tip

The Muppets vs. Capcom

It’s a Very Merry Muppet Victoria Day

A Muppets Christmas: Letters to
Their Local MLAs

Kermit Saves the Canucks’ Playoff Series

The Muppets: SVU

Non-humans of SFU

By
EIC
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0

ONLINE_Let's Face It

Emojis that iPhone users are sick of not having

By
EIC
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0
Photo courtesy of Mic
Photo courtesy of Mic
Photo courtesy of Mic

It’s been a little over a month since Apple unleashed their latest wave of emojis — just enough time for people to forget about the good and return to complaining about the bad. While users can appreciate the increased diversity in skin colours and the addition of several same-sex couple emojis, can we please address some of the noticeable gaps still existent in the emoji spectrum? Take note, Apple.

A taco emoji: If you browse any survey about the world’s most popular foods, you’ll undoubtedly find tacos/Mexican food somewhere on that list. Taco Tuesdays have been without proper emoji representation for long enough, as well as Cinco de Mayo. At this point, it just feels like Apple are trolling us more than anything.

A cupcake emoji: Nothing would be sweeter than for the next set of emojis to include a cupcake emoji. I’m not even asking for a range of cupcakes — although that would certainly be ideal — but at least one type so I can effectively text someone the next time I see the Criminology students holding a bake sale fundraiser in Blusson Hall.

A laughing nun emoji: We have a chapel emoji, we have an angel emoji, and yet we still don’t have an emoji of a nun laughing because you cracked a delightful yet appropriate joke in Sunday school. Where are the priorities?

A Klingon battle sword (also known as a Bat’leth) emoji: How awkward is it when you’re texting a friend about Klingon death rituals and you realize there’s no Bat’leth emoji? If Apple’s going to promote diversity with dozens of more country flags, the least they could do is remain inclusive to all cultures. It would make me very happy — or as they say in Klingon, “It would make me very happy.

Your sassy Aunt Sally emoji: Not all middle-aged sassy aunts are created the same, so why does my iPhone represent them as such? The only sassy aunt emoji available now is a brunette that sort of resembles your Aunt Cheryl, so where’s the blonde one that could stand in for your Aunt Sally?!

A customer who’s never satisfied emoji: How hard would it be to create an emoji that looks like a consumer that fails to ever be satisfied with what he or she has, always wanting more? After the most recent update I spent a solid five minutes scanning the emoji keyboard, just hoping I’d find an image of a customer who’s as thankless as I am, but no such luck.

A noose emoji: I mean, come on, Apple! I’m sick of having to type out the word noose when an emoji of rope tied into one would be so much more convenient. I think it could even prove to be one of the most popular emojis of all time, if you gave it a chance.

Stephen Harper to launch new line of dad-friendly denims

By
EIC
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0
Illustration by Janis McMath
Illustration by Janis McMath
Illustration by Janis McMath

With support for the Conservative party waning across Canada, the prime minister is again under fire for a new Conservative initiative: during a press conference last Wednesday, Stephen Harper revealed that he had been using the last nine years as leader of the country to help establish a new line of casual, heavy-duty jeans for men who are over 50 and have children.

For months, several political analysts have speculated that Harper’s nonsensical, seeming tyrannical actions had an ulterior motive behind them, but no one could have predicted that his secret agenda involved denims that are made surprisingly comfortable, without sacrificing style.

“He’s truly found his calling with DadJeans,” Bill McMasters, a spokesperson for the new clothing line, said at a press conference immediately following the prime minister’s announcement. “Harper’s really put everything else on the backburner these last couple of years and it shows. The jean world will never be the same again.”

According to McMasters, Harper was largely inspired by fabrics he encountered during diplomatic trips to Syria and Egypt, which at the time drew scrutiny for their lack of transparency and tactfulness.

“Harper’s decisions to visit these countries may have been controversial at the time,” continued McMasters, “but you know what isn’t controversial? Denims that are two per cent Egyptian cotton. They feel smoother than a Herb Alpert album.”

Aside from the diplomatic trips, McMasters has also confirmed for Harper that the recent Bill C-51 was less about protecting Canadian citizens and more about preventing jean-hating terrorists from hindering potential sales in the near future. As well, the muzzling of Canadian scientists in recent years has been part of a larger plan to keep Harper’s patented cross-stitching and leg-length-to-waist ratio ahead of the industry curve.

Following his initial announcement, Harper said that he hoped Canadians would understand why the actions were necessary, and promised that the global fashion market “would be all the better for it.”

The launch of DadJeans couldn’t come at a better time for the Prime Minister, as the country’s citizens prepare to head to the polls this October for a federal election. Early reports show that Harper will likely join the 6.6 per cent of Canadians who are currently jobless, but the line of denims could be just the life preserver Harper needs to stay afloat after the inevitable crushing defeat.

“I think we should all be happy for Mr. Harper and his undying efforts to remain employed,” McMasters concluded the press conference, “much like a pair of boot-cut DadJeans, Mr. Harper is sturdy, reliable, and made up of 100 per cent Canadian materials.

“I think the moral of this story is  that sometimes, we have to overlook a bit of political misinformation if the end result is a garment as trustworthy as this.”

Netflix to begin streaming all of Steph Millers’ family home videos

By
EIC
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0
Photo courtesy of Cord Cutter News
Photo courtesy of Cord Cutter News
Photo courtesy of Cord Cutter News

Fans and all current members of Steph Miller’s family, rejoice! As of June 1, the on-demand entertainment juggernaut Netflix is adding all of the Millers’ personal home movies to its already-teeming viewing library.

“Our subscribers have spoken and what they want is quality programming that’s enjoyable for viewers of all ages,” read a press release distributed yesterday morning. “Nostalgia is a powerful thing and we’re excited to be a part of that wonderful emotion. Hopefully this is just the first in many acquisitions to bring every family in North America closer to the Millers.”

Following in the footsteps of classic late ‘90s/early 2000s television shows like Gilmore Girls, Ally McBeal, and Friends, all of the Millers’ home videos will be made available in their entirety and exclusively to Netflix users.

If 19-year-old Stephanie Miller’s name doesn’t ring a bell, here’s what you need to know: the Millers are a quirky suburban family from Mission, BC, where the pace of life moves just a bit slower. Throughout the home videos’ duration, viewers get to experience the ups and downs of modern family life, as well as watch the Millers try to balance their lives outside of the house with their responsibilities at home. Comedy, drama, and coming-of-age lessons combine effortlessly in this heartwarming series of videos taken directly from a box in the Millers’ attic.

News of the streaming service’s interest in every last clip of Steph’s embarrassing childhood surfaced late last year, but a question of copyright ownership reportedly prevented Netflix from closing any deals. However, because the Miller clan operates under the strict guidelines of Mr. Miller’s “my house, my rules” policy, it was ultimately decided that because his money paid for the video camera, the device — and all footage recorded on it — belonged to him, he was free to make the deal.

At the start of next month, all of the Millers’ favourite home videos will be available for instant viewing, including “Baby’s first steps,” “Piano recital (Stephy),” and “Mexico vacation ’99.” Even home movies from the family’s less popular/critically successful years, like “New Years 2010,” will be streaming on Netflix.

“Sorry weeknd plans w/ friends #netflix #millermania,” one Twitter user tweeted following the announcement, using the hashtag millermania to imply his excitement over Netflix’s latest addition.

“Jus finishd daredevil,” another user tweeted, “almost had 2 go outside but crisis avertd #millermania.”

Netflix has yet to comment on how much the exclusive streaming rights to the Millers’ personal videos cost, but rivals like Hulu and Amazon Prime are surely kicking themselves at the lost opportunity.

In the meantime, HBO GO has announced that they will begin streaming all of Korban Daniels from Barkerville’s family videos as early as this summer.

“It certainly seems like this is where the market is heading,” said Tony Stanfield, an expert in marketing and technology at SFU. “First streaming services were focused on current shows, then on older shows, followed by debuting original content. It wouldn’t surprise me if in five or 10 years, home video footage occupied a large chunk of the world’s streaming content.”

This week in comics

By
EIC
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0

CMYK_Peers #2Peers (Leslie Lu)

CMYK_Seagull Square #2Seagull Square (Jill Mandrake)

Agoraphobia Man #2 copyThe Adventures of Agoraphobia Man: World Defender (Jacey Gibb)

Online Pun 2 3
Pun 2 3 (Sarah Walker)

SFU gives Aboriginal entrepreneurs a head start

By
EIC
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0
Photo courtesy of SFU Beedie

A $1 million donation has enabled SFU’s Beedie School of Business to launch a program geared towards supporting Aboriginal entrepreneurs.

The First Peoples Enterprise Accelerator (FPEA) was made possible by a contribution made from the RBC foundation. It has also funded several scholarships for Aboriginal students interested in entrepreneurship.

The accelerator, which will be run out of RADIUS (RADical Ideas, Useful to Society), a business incubator within the Beedie School, will help fledgling ventures get off their feet and assist in the growth of more mature enterprises.

The FPEA was originally conceived to be part of the First Peoples House, which was proposed in 2012 as a centre for Aboriginal students, faculty, and staff on Burnaby Campus. Once the First Peoples House project is complete, the two ventures will be linked.

Donovan Woollard, ventures director at RADIUS, spoke to the origin of FPEA: “SFU and the RBC Foundation were in conversation around how to have a lasting impact and the concept of supporting entrepreneurship in First Nations communities came up as an exciting prospect.”

This winter, the Enterprise Accelerator will welcome its first cohort. Over the next six months, RADIUS will be “figuring out what do Aboriginal entrepreneurs need and what are the places where we can help them with those needs.” Woollard added, “[There] are lots of ways to waste $1 million and only a few ways to actually add some real value.”

RADIUS is currently assessing how this particular enterprise accelerator will function. “One of the key questions we’re still grappling with is, ‘are we going to work in individual geographic communities, or are we going to focus on certain sectors that serve a number of different Aboriginal communities?’” said Woollard. He suggested renewable energy as a possible sector on which to focus.

The scholarships are being offered through the Executive MBA in Aboriginal Business and Leadership program. RBC will fund $30,000 in financial awards each year to four students for the next 10 years.

Mark Selman, program director for this EMBA, explained the benefits of such financial support: “The EMBA program costs over $50,000 to take and so for most people, finding sources of support is important.”

Selman noted that since SFU launched the EMBA program forty years ago, in each cohort there has only been on average half a dozen Aboriginal students. The enrolment for the EMBA in Aboriginal Business has risen to 25 Aboriginal students out of 30 in the second cohort of the program. “It’s probably the largest number of Aboriginal students studying business together in North America.”

A large number of First Nations communities have pioneered economic development including the Stó:lō nation in the Fraser Valley and the West Bank nation in the Okanagan, the latter of which has 400 businesses located in its reserve territory. Selman commented, “Each of those areas and many other communities have programs of one sort or another, but I think it will add to the mix to be able to provide certain university level programs.”

Woollard acknowledged that an integral part of the success of the initiative as a whole will be “recognizing that, historically, Aboriginal communities in Canada have been quite purposely marginalized by the settler communities.

“A program like this is very much just one step in coming to a place where we’re starting to undo some of the very gross injustices of the past.”

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Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

Contact us: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society 1965-2024

Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

Contact us:
[email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society 1965-2024