The dos and don’ts of breaking up

By Ms. X

“My partner and I just broke up. It was my first serious relationship in university and I have no idea how to handle it. We’re in the same friend group so we are constantly around each other. Please help me!”

Ending a relationship is never easy. Whether it was mutual or one-sided, everyone needs time to heal and move forward.  Here is a sexy do and don’t list to give you a basic idea of how to handle your breakup and enjoy your single life.

DO: Find a good group of friends. If you shared a lot of friends with your ex, it may be time to contact some friends outside your main group or pick up a part time job with a young, fun staff. Having a fresh group of people around you will make the transition easier, and a little harmless flirting with a co-worker is never a bad way to kill time at work.

DO: Keep busy. After a relationship ends, you are usually left with a lot of free time. Use this newly freed up time to do something just for you. Why not pick up that guitar you told yourself you would learn to play? Not being tied down, your summer is open for anything so grab some friends (and definitely some hotties) and plan a road trip or hit the beaches.

DO: Spend some “me time.”  One of the biggest things missing after a breakup is your sex life. Though one path to take is hitting the bar and finding someone for the night, a safer and likely a more satisfying option is have some solo fun. Treat yourself to a new toy and take some time to discover that you may be all you need to maintain a healthy sex life.

DO NOT: Stay in bed and mope all day. Its summer! Get out there and meet new people. You don’t need to be on the lookout for the next Mr. or Ms. Perfect right away, but a rebound never hurts! Go out with some friends and flirt freely. A little attention is always nice.

DO NOT: Jump right into another relationship.  Rebounds are a fun way to transition into singledom, but don’t get carried away with someone. By moving quickly into a new partnership, you risk bringing your past relationships issues with you, which isn’t fair to you or your new partner. Give yourself time to be single and mingle!

DO NOT: Bombard your ex with texts or phone calls. It can be hard to move on right away but it is important to give your cell a rest from dialing their number. Constantly trying to contact them will only make things harder for you and most likely only annoy your ex.  When you pick up that phone and have the urge, text your bestie or bro, or even better, that cutie who gave you their number at the pub last night.

Breakups are never fun, and it can be hard to distance yourself from your ex if you run in the same circles. Just remember to look on the bright side, single life opens up doors all over the place. A hottie rebound might be what you need to give your solo persona a boost, and a new toy may lead to a more satisfying sex life than you had before. Being unattached, your summer is open to all kinds of new experiences and adventures so DON’T waste time being bummed out, and DO go out and embrace your single life!

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