SFU

2 min 0 1600

SFU history department shuts down because “who cares, what’s done is done”

Humour March 16, 2020

Written by Marco Ovies, Arts Editor On Friday, SFU’s incoming president Joy Johnson announced her plans to shut down SFU’s Department of History. The university hosted a Town Hall in Images Theatre for students to discuss the future of the school’s history programs. “Who cares about history?” Johnson pointed out to the crowd, to raucous applause. “It already happened! It’s over! What’s done is done!” Students were vocal in supporting Johnson’s announcement, joining in a chant of “Liberty Bell! Disappointing and dumb!” throughout the assembly. Some students even feel that the department staff will benefit from being ousted. “These profs…

Continue reading Read more
An illustration of a girl with long flowing hair. Astrological signs and stars shine around her.
3 min 0 1025

Your weekly SFU horoscopes: March 16–22

Humour March 16, 2020

Written by Zach Siddiqui, Humour Editor Aries — March 21–April 19 Oh, did you hear that on the grapevine? It’s an earwig, and she wants you.  Taurus — April 20–May 20 This week, you run this town. That comes with…

Continue reading Read more
2 min 0 1426

Lonely first-year fed up that no one has saved him from his inner darkness yet

Humour March 10, 2020

Written by Jennifer Low, Peak Associate A first year SFU student is threatening to sue the university for false advertising: namely, their failure to provide the happiness and friendship he expected to finally receive after high school. “I don’t understand…

Continue reading Read more
2 min 0 1170

SUBJECT: Time To Unionize, Fellow Tall Pale Male Bartenders of Vancouver

Humour March 10, 2020

Written by Meera Eragoda, Staff Writer From: [email protected] Subject: The Revolution Stouts Now Comrades in Ales, Have you ever found yourself wondering about the struggle that so many of us are facing of late? You go in to get a…

Continue reading Read more
3 min 0 1157

Friends beg their friend-turned-Twitter-activist to let them live ignorantly in peace

Humour March 10, 2020

Written by Kim Regala, Staff Writer Have a seat, Steve. Before we begin, we want you to know that we’re only doing this out of pure concern. Concern for you, but most importantly, concern for the recent changes in your…

Continue reading Read more
An illustration of a girl with long flowing hair. Astrological signs and stars shine around her.
3 min 0 1058

Your weekly SFU horoscopes: March 9–March 15

Humour March 10, 2020

Written by Zach Siddiqui, Humour Editor Aries — March 21–April 19 You yearn to rest this week, but you may find it difficult to properly recharge. You’ll try to learn from your phone’s example, only to be faced with a…

Continue reading Read more
8 min 0 2383

The mind behind the memes: An exclusive interview with @sfu_raccoons

Features March 6, 2020

By: Madeleine Chan, Staff Writer With over 1,100 followers on Instagram, @sfu_raccoons has become a hit hub for showcasing SFU’s favourite furry friends. I interviewed the person behind @sfu_raccoons to get the inside scoop on their growing social-media stardom; their first…

Continue reading Read more
3 min 0 1525

Lesser-known SFU Clubs to help fuel your artistic soul

Arts March 4, 2020

by Marco Ovies, Arts Editor Here it comes: the near-end-of-the-semester blues. I don’t know about you, but Week 9 is always the toughest for me because a) my classes start talking about our final papers and exams, b) I’m ready…

Continue reading Read more
3 min 0 1621

QUIZ: Did you glow up MORE or LESS than SFUNET?

Humour March 3, 2020

Written by Madeleine Chan, Staff Writer SFUNET has gone through some major transformations lately. (You know, that Wi-Fi network that’s always there, but never really gets used because it’s overshadowed by the far superior SFUNET-SECURE and eduroam.) Before, you had…

Continue reading Read more
2 min 0 1289

SUBJECT: I am single-user access and your syllabus can try again later

Humour March 3, 2020

Written by Madeleine Chan, Staff Writer From: Cora P. Wright <[email protected]> To: Bob Auldmann <[email protected]>, Ted Bouks <[email protected]>, Moe Rinsane <[email protected]> Subject: I am single-user access and your syllabus can try again later Dear professors, I regret to inform you…

Continue reading Read more