Campus Update

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Campus Update: October 22nd, 2012

EIC October 22, 2012

University board concocts elaborate tale of “Where the koi fish went” Crisis struck this week when, during the bi-monthly meeting of the faculty deans and associate chairs, SFU president Andrew Petter asked aloud, “Where do the koi fishes go in the winter when the pond gets all frozen and stuff?” Caught off-guard by the comment and not wanting to upset the former attorney general of British Columbia, the entire board hastily concocted an elaborate tale of koi fish’s migration, with each adding onto the fabrications of the previous board member. An epic was constructed of the koi fish travelling through…

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Campus Update: July 16, 2012

EIC July 16, 2012

SFU voted 394th in top 1,000 over 1,000 In a recent polling conducted by popular Canadian news magazine MacLeans, SFU was ranked 394st, dropping 7 spots from its 2012 ranking. The 1,000 over 1,000 ranks the top 1,000 post-secondary insititutions…

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Campus Update: May 6th

May 6, 2012

Three-legged pitbull adorably mauls mail carrier Gnarles Bark-ley, a precocious three-legged pit bull, was taken away by the SPCA last Thursday after violently mauling postal worker Kenneth Cole. The Canada Post worker was making his rounds when the rambunctious and…

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Campus Updates: March 26th

EIC March 26, 2012

Mysterious ball of light appears over SFU Panicked and frightened students ran amok across the Burnaby campus last Wednesday, as what was described by several onlookers as “ a mysterious ball of light” rose from the horizon and suspended itself…

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Campus Update: February 27th

EIC February 27, 2012

>>Burnaby Mountain reclassified The Society of Orographers recently revoked Burnaby Mountain’s status as an official mountain, instead reclassifying it as a large hillock. Spokesperson for the society, Alan Jackson, told The Peak that the decision to change the status of…

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Campus Update: Jan 23rd

EIC January 23, 2012

<strong>By <a href="http://159.203.128.194/tag/Gary-Lim">Gary Lim</a></strong> Christian clubs consolidate into super club Spurred by a popular vote from their members, the nine individual clubs devoted to the appreciation and celebration of Christianity have decided to band into a single club.  The reasons…

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