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#OURDecisionSFU calls upon the university to acknowledge the real reason behind the “Clan” name change

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Illustration courtesy of the SFSS.

By Serena Bains, Staff Writer

SFU has an extensive history of participating in institutional racism against Black students, faculty, and staff. The hesitancy to acknowledge and address the SFU athletics team name of the ‘Clan’ continues to be one of SFU’s most blatant displays of racism against Black students in particular. 

Black student activists put years of physical and emotional labour behind a collective goal to change the name due to its associations with the Ku Klux Klan and white supremacy, and the harm the association has caused Black athletes. Because of the association, there were multiple incidents as a result of the name that student athletes and coaches had to endure due to SFU’s inaction.

After years of labour and undue burden, the work of Black students and allies came to fruition as a name change was announced. Former SFU president Andrew Petter announced the name change in a problematic statement which completely ignored the work of Black students, the negative connotations of the previous name, and the harm his years of inaction caused. 

“We were truly relieved that the community actively supported Black athletes’ calls for SFU to drop the triggering team name. However, we were disappointed – but unsurprised – by the blatant systemic racism at play on SFU’s part throughout the whole name-change process,” said Balqees (she/her/hers), a member of the BIPOC committee, in an interview with The Peak.

In response to Petter’s statement, the Simon Fraser Student Society’s (SFSS) BIPOC committee created an email campaign called #OURDecisionSFU

The campaign “list[s] a few concerns regarding the statement pertaining to the SFU Athletics team name, followed by calls to action for SFU to rectify the situation by: 

  1. Publicly stating that SFU is dropping the ‘Clan’ name due to its racist connotation with the Ku Klux Klan [ . . . ] 
  2. Publicly, and specifically, acknowledging the harm inflicted and unpaid labour forced on Black students and athletes [ . . . ] crediting those who spent countless hours advocating and organizing for the name change [ . . . ]
  3. Upholding the health values of the Okanagan Charter [ . . . ]
  4. Supporting Black students with specific resources for Black athletes.”

Balqees continued, “The BIPOC Committee launched #OURDecisionSFU to continue supporting the name-change movement that Black athletes and students started years ago. We want to make sure that the process of the name-change is done with honour and respect to BIPOC, and that SFU adequately supports our Black student athletes and POC allies who faced the burden and trauma at the forefront of this advocacy.”

Othniel (he/him/his), the student athlete who created the petition for the name change, stated, “Although from what I’ve seen from SFU’s action for the name change is acknowledgeable. I don’t believe it’s enough.

“First, the lack of recognition of those that spearheaded this change is just saddening. Second, the truth behind my involvement during the petition for the name change was to ensure that people understood how the team name has a racist connotation, thus easily traumatizing and creating a discomforted space for student-athletes of colour that have to wear it every day. However, that wasn’t fully addressed in the statement.”

Marie (she/her/hers), a member of the BIPOC committee, spoke to the deception of Petter’s statement. 

“Andrew Petter disingenuously deemed the name change as his own decision in his statement on the athletics name-change,” said Marie.

“It is unjust for SFU to claim this decision as purely the University’s choice, especially after years of systemically overlooking and gaslighting Black Athletes’ concerns, when we know it was our collective community pressure that forced the institution to act.

She continued, “During the summer of 2020, BIPOC organizers put in 20-30 hours of weekly unpaid labour all the while experiencing reliving the emotional trauma caused by the issue. 

“The goal of these organized efforts were to usher in a movement in hopes of pressuring and cornering the University to listen to the calls of Black Athletes suffering. To say the athletics name-change was SFU’s decision is deceiving – this was our decision.”

The campaign outlines their demands, concerns, background on the issue, and provides an email template to demonstrate support for the initiative. In their demands, #OURDecisionSFU also calls on President Joy Johnson, who has stated on multiple occasions that equity, diversity, and inclusion, is one of her top priorities.

“[T]he BIPOC Committee invited President Joy Johnson to our regularly scheduled meeting to discuss the campaign’s calls to action, along with anti-racism initiatives at SFU as a whole,” said Balqees. 

“On October 19th, we were joined by Joy and AVP Rummana Khan Hemani, who oversees student services at SFU. While we are grateful for having productive conversation, we have yet to see enough action to redress the harms of the former team name.

“We’re glad to hear that Joy committed to releasing a public statement from the Office of the President regarding the athletics team name change, though we were disappointed that we did not receive a commitment to a specific date when we asked for a timeline,” expressed Balqees.

In terms of what’s next for the #OURDecisionSFU campaign, Marie stated the following:

“It’s essential that we continue to amplify BIPOC voices. The SFSS will continue to hold the institution accountable and demand that SFU allocate much needed resources to BIPOC Athletes suffering trauma due to their former team name. As an ally, I have taken a commitment in fighting and amplifying for Athlete’s – I will do so until the harms of the former team name are redressed and the athletes are provided with the adequate resources they deserve.”

The campaign to date has resulted in 204 emails sent of their goal of 500. To learn more about #OURDecisionSFU visit https://sfss.ca/ourdecsionsfu/

The Peak staff reveal their best worst childhood costumes

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PHOTO: Emma Jean / The Peak

By: Juztin Bello, Emma Jean, Dhivya Manohar, and Paige Riding

By Juztin

PHOTO: Juztin Bello / The Peak

I wasn’t big on creative costumes when I was a kid — evident by the fact I have no photos to submit before the age of 19. Once I got into that age where Halloween was less about trick-or-treatin’ and more about keg stands-or-pongin’, my perspective on Halloween changed. 

Here you can see one of my favourite costumes in which I’m Barnacle Boy from Spongebob Squarepants. The best part about this outfit was the equal levels of nostalgia and comfort; because if I’ve learned anything about going out on Halloween, you want to ride that line of comfortable and cute extremely delicately. I don’t remember much else from this night that I spent as the sidekick to the Champion of the Deep, but that sound of a whole room chanting for Barnacle Boy as I did a keg stand will never be forgotten. To this day, still have no clue where we parked the Invisible Boatmobile.

By Emma

PHOTO: Emma Jean / The Peak

In grade four, my deliberation reached a very 2010 crossroads: do I go as Justin Bieber — whose fashion choices and haircut had an uncanny resemblance to my own — or as a strip of bacon, a costume I found online on our boxy PC? Consultations with classmates, teachers and friendly adults revealed bacon as the unanimous answer. After the longest three weeks of my life, the parcel finally came and I paired it with my best bacon-flavoured lip balm. I wore it trick-or-treating and to a family friend’s party where I struck this Burt Reynolds-like pose beside my dad. 

In a twist of irony, the dawning of my self-awareness and worldview would soon have me begging my parents to let me become a vegetarian until they let me permanently convert. As far as costumes go, this one smoked the competition.

By Dhiv

PHOTO: Dhivya Manohar / The Peak

This was a very abrupt decision from Halloween 2011. I thought I wasn’t going to celebrate Halloween anymore, but all my friends were still going to dress up, so I gave in to peer pressure. The night before Halloween, I pulled out a white jacket, black and white t-shirt, black yoga pants, and socks and made this. It was impulsive but hands-down the best costume I ever had.

By Paige

PHOTO: Paige Riding / The Peak

This is me at the ripe old age of two, when the only problems I had were “will mom place me in front of the TV when Elmo is on” and “wait the human brain can’t recall memories from before the age of three did I even exist back then?” Y2K may have warned about the end of the world, but at least I could pay homage to my world, Elmo, before the end. Not much else to say but “when did I change from an innocent little Elmo on the kitchen floor to a depressed blue-haired socialist?”

S. Laurel Weldon inducted into the Royal Society of Canada

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Written by: Mahdi Dialden, News Writer

SFU political science Professor S. Laurel Weldon has been inducted into the Royal Society of Canada (RSC), which honours researchers for their achievements in their respective fields. Professor Weldon’s research specializes in the role of social movements in influencing public policy, violence against women, and gender equality policies around the world. 

When asked about her induction into the RSC in an interview with The Peak, she said, “It’s a labour of love [ . . . ] it feels like a lot of recognition of that hard work.” Weldon added that academics “do a lot of work on the weekend” such as “a lot of work in evenings [getting up early and] a lot of travelling.” 

The state of women’s rights and equality during her formative years catalyzed her interest in researching this field. Weldon stated that she had high expectations for equality in Canada; however, Weldon found it shocking “how recent some of the changes were and [ . . . ] the inequalities that persisted.” She added that she was particularly surprised about violence against women. 

One of the main takeaways Weldon highlighted is that “protest is an important avenue of influence for people who are otherwise excluded from power in various ways.” She also noted that, “We need people to have a passion for their issues and to be bringing new ideas and perspectives to our political life in order to have a robust and inclusive society.”

Weldon believes that what separates her method of research from others, is that she “like[s] to ask big questions, big theoretical questions, and [compile her own] datasets.” Building on this discussion, Weldon offered this comparison about her work about how she collects data: “I think being a social scientist, it’s like a detective, right? You’ve gotta take all the evidence that you have.”

One of her research projects focuses on gathering large datasets that are related to women’s rights. Weldon also studies inequality in family law — the legal aspect of family matters that directly affect women. Factors like feminist movements, women in government, and the presence of democracy in different countries are factors she looks at. 

Professor Weldon was a distinguished professor at Purdue University in Indiana for 18 years, followed by a two-year tenure as a Vice Provost there as well. She had started a couple of research centers there, including one on diversity inclusion and public policy research. 

Additionally, Weldon has written several books, the most recent one titled The Logic of Gender Justice co-authored with Mala Htun from the University of New Mexico. The book won an award from the International Studies Association for the best book on human rights in 2019. 

Discover the horrors of new worlds with these spooky movies

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By: Pamela Subía, SFU Student

Horror movies are largely known for their gore, suspense, supernatural occurrences, and societal commentary — but they also have the ability to submerge you in alternative worlds. As Halloween approaches, and we begin to plan our spooky movie nights with friends or family, The Peak has come up with a diverse horror movie list with films ranging from 80s classics to independent stop-motion productions.These films will all take you head first into various worlds, from that of the modelling industry to the afterlife.

Beetlejuice (1988)

Courtesy of Warner Bros Pictures

This is an amazing 80s classic directed by Tim Burton, and is also a great childhood flashback to many of us. Often considered an eccentric fantasy film, Beetlejuice humorously explores the world of the afterlife and cleverly hypothesizes its potential similarity with mortal reality. The film tells the story of a deceased married couple trapped in their old house as ghosts. (Mis)guided by the instructions of a poltergeist called Beetlejuice, they discover the afterlife, though not without first attempting to get rid of a family who has purchased their home. Their adventures bring along an infinity of obstacles but also a long lasting friendship.

Coraline (2009)

Courtesy of Focus Features

One of my personal favorite stop-motion movies of all time for its dark mood and creepy-looking animations, Coraline explores the unexpected imperfections of an idealized alternative reality. The film depicts the story of a teenager (Coraline) who is dissatisfied with her family and friendships. An encounter with her new neighbours and her curiosity lead her to discovering a portal to an alternative reality with button-eyed versions of her family and acquaintances, which seem ideal — until a series of events show her the dark side of this seemingly perfect world.

Suspiria (2018)

Courtesy of Amazon Studios

Whether or not you’re already a fan of the classic Suspiria, this Halloween would be a great time to give Luca Guadagnino’s 2018 remake a chance. Starring Dakota Johnson, Suspiria tells the story of Susie, a young dancer who is admitted to her dream academy, where she attracts the attention of her superiors with her singular talent. However, a series of mysterious events show Susie the dark secret held by the higher members of the dance academy. She is soon introduced to a dangerous world of witchcraft which she will need to find her way out of.

Tesis (1996)

Courtesy of Las Producciones del Escorpión, S.L.

The earliest full-length film of Alejandro Amenábar, this movie is a frightening and incomparable experience that explores the unknown world of the deep web. With engaging dialogues that intensify the suspense of the film, Tesis tells the story of a student who is working on her final thesis under the topic of audiovisual violence. Her research leads her into the discovery of snuff films, not knowing she will later need to pay a tough price for her discovery. 

The Neon Demon (2016)

Courtesy of Amazon Studios

If you’re already familiar with Nicolas Winding Refn’s crime and drama masterpieces like Drive, The Neon Demon is an experience you cannot miss. This film starts nothing like a horror film and soon becomes truly nerve-wracking without ever losing its impeccable cinematography and engaging plot. The mixture of captivating scene compositions with thought-provoking character choices will keep you asking what happens next. This is the story of a young girl who discovers the world of modelling in LA. Her obsession with perfection and approval will soon involve her in a toxic competition, revealing the true colors of the fashion industry.

La Casa Lobo (2018)

Courtesy of Upstream Gallery, Amsterdam

This is a hypnotizing and frightening independent film from Chilean stop motion artists Cristóbal León and Joaquín Cociña. La Casa Lobo tells the story of Maria, a girl who lives in a tightly-controlled and conservative German colony in Chile. Her naivety and curiosity for the outside world lead her to run away, but she soon encounters the dangers outside of her colony. On her way, she discovers that she is being stalked by a greater force that will not let her go too far from home.

SFSS hosts 2020 Annual General Meeting

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Photo Courtesy of the SFSS via Twitter

Written by: Mahdi Dialden

The Simon Fraser Student Society (SFSS) held their Annual General Meeting (AGM) for its members — all SFU undergraduates — on Monday, October 26, 2020 via Zoom. The meeting included several by-law proposals and an official condemnation directed towards SFU for the recent tuition hikes. 

One of the proposals entailed discussion by members voicing their concerns on the Council. The proposal was set to give the Council — which consists of departmental student union (DSU) representatives —  a voice when working with the Board. This ongoing issue stemmed from problems with the 2018/19 SFSS Board and showed that the student government didn’t have the opportunity to adequately represent the students — specifically, marginalized groups. 

During the discussion, one member expressed their support for the proposal saying, “There’s a difference between welcoming someone into a space and actually creating and designing that space with their needs in mind. Changing the actual system to allow these marginalized populations to have an equal seat at the decision-making table and have their voices heard on an equal level, represents the creation of a space. Representation is key and I really believe that the new organization of the SFSS governing body is the way to achieve it.” 

Conversely, a council member for the Bachelors of Environment Student Union expressed that they are against the motion saying, “We don’t really get to hear the student group that we’re representing nearly as much as we’d like to, so therefore, representing and having more power on council doesn’t necessarily mean more student power.” They also added, “The council stipends are not high enough to encourage actual time commitment from us as counselors.” The proposal passed with 86% in favour and 14% against.

The tuition hikes condemnation was also a headline topic, where students expressed their outrage on the issue. VP University Relations Gabe Liosis responded to a student’s comment on SFU’s operation as a business by saying, “The university operates like a business and you’re 100% right. And what businesses try to do is [try] to make the most money [from] buying their services and are buying their goods. And that really is not how a university should run. Universities should not be a source for exploitation of students.” The vote would mean that the SFSS would be condemning and speaking on behalf of students, to answer why they would raise prices, specifically during a pandemic. The discussion was cut short, and a vote was motioned in which it passed with 98%.  

By-law proposal two was directed towards clarifying the vagueness of the executive portfolios in the by-laws and instead of making it clear as to what each position entails. The new list of positions includes President, VP Internal and Organizational Development, VP Finance and Services, VP University and Academic Affairs, VP External and Community Affairs, VP Equity and Sustainability, and VP Events and Student Affairs. 

The third by-law proposal sought to clarify the definitions of student groups, which include student unions and constituency groups. For example, there will now be one representative from each Affiliated Student Group, to be elected by their respective Affiliated Student Group in the Council. Constituency groups, which represent and serve their members who share an experience or condition of oppression and systemic discrimination, are now included in the by-laws and may be recognized officially by the board if they meet the requirements. This proposal was passed with 97% of members in favour. 

SFSS President Osob Mohamed, who chaired the meeting, expressed her gratitude for the attendance and student response to the event. Mohamed said on Twitter, “600+ attendees at our first ever online AGM, new bylaws passed, and @SFU will need to answer to the students’ condemnation of tuition increases. Thank you to our membership for trusting me to chair such a legendary meeting. This is student power!” This is the largest turnout at an SFSS AGM since 2006.

SFU C19 Coalition condemns tuition hikes

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Photo Courtesy of SFU C19 Coalition via Facebook

Written by: Karissa Ketter, News Writer

The SFU C19 Coalition is asking SFU Senior Administration to formally defer tuition and withdraw fee increases for the 2020–21 academic year. The Coalition is a grassroots organization of students and staff at SFU fighting for the Senior Administration to prioritize “equity, justice, and redistribution of resources” during the pandemic, according to co-organizer Balqees Jama.

Their demands include increasing transparency on SFU’s COVID-19 responses, recognizing that there has been a decrease in quality of education for students and an increase in workload for instructors, as well as implementing a tuition deferment. 

The organization is demanding action from SFU as well as the federal and provincial governments to see more clarity, democracy, and respect for the challenges that students are facing amidst the pandemic. 

As noted by Jama in an email statement to The Peak, “the C19 Coalition will increase pressure and campaigns if the university is not responsive to students’ and workers’ concerns.” This will be ongoing work, and they will continue to campaign for “the health and financial interests” of all. 

Currently, the Simon Fraser Student Society (SFSS), the Graduate Student Society (GSS), the Teaching Support Staff Union (TSSU), and Tuition Freeze Now have all endorsed the Coalition

The support of the TSSU “ensures there is solidarity between students and teaching support staff during this pandemic.” The Coalition is not pushing the rhetoric of teachers against students, as they recognize that staff at SFU are also experiencing tuition burdens, an increased workload, and mental health challenges, according to Jama. She also noted that the support of their union is “a good resource because of its long history of organizing students and workers on campus.”

The Coalition sought student body opinions during many opportunities such as the SFSS COVID-19 Survey and the C19 Coalition Town Hall. They stated that they will continue to engage with students and represent their needs to the administration. 

Jama noted that it’s “important for students and workers to be able to afford an education and survive without sacrificing their health or academic studies.” 

The C19 Coalition is currently running a petition that has over 1,400 signatures. Students can sign-up to be an organizer here. They also encourage students to contact local representatives, their respective academic departments, SFU’s administration, or to sign the GSS Letter to BC’s Health Minister and the Migrant Student United! petition. 

An SFU Halloween choose your own adventure

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PHOTO: Gudrun Wai-Gunnarsson / The Peak

By: Paige Riding, Humour Editor

INTRO:

It’s Halloween! And you, being the procrastinating piece of shit you are, left a major project due tonight until this morning. With someone in your house dressed as a bootleg Coraline wearing a blue mop head blaring the same three seconds of a Melanie Martinez song for a ~spooky~ TikTok, you opt to work on campus. It’s a Friday night during remote learning. You thought you were alone.

START:

Suddenly, a bang sounds from RCB. You snap your head up as your 450 out of 1,000 words scream at you to not look away. Do you:

A) Continue working. It was probably a psychology TA banging their head against the brick wall. Mood  — but also, not my business. (Go to 5)

B) Go and see what the noise was. What’s procrastinating but a staple of my personality at this point? (Go to 6)

─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────

  1. You hurry to the parking lot, heart racing. As you head outside, a dense fog hinders your sight and you stumble. You feel a presence. Just as you remember that you didn’t drive here at all, a haunting wail sounds behind you. You turn around and . . . 

It’s your classmate, Steve.

“I didn’t hand in my assignment in time!” he wailed. You check your phone. It’s 12:01 a.m. and you didn’t finish it, either. (End)

~

  1. You turn back to your laptop and try to refocus. As you type, the discomfort of being watched grows unbearable. You dare to turn back to look down the hallway at the figure . . . but it’s gone.

“Hey there,” a voice whispers suddenly behind you. You yelp and whip your head toward the voice.

“. . . Sorry to bug you, but can you put your mask over your mouth and nose?” asks a security guard with an ill-fitting jacket on. You slide your mask up as your life expectancy from that scare goes down. (End)

~

  1. You turn left and head down the hallway. Illuminated by the full moon is a large, menacing silhouette. You dare to walk closer until . . .

“Sorry if this wheeled whiteboard thing was loud when it fell over. I’m exhausted. I’ve been doing research all damn week,” a tired TA mumbles to you behind it. Honestly, you just wish you could say the same. (End)

~

  1. You stand up and slowly head towards the figure. When you get close enough, you’re stopped dead in your tracks.

“Happy Halloween! Sorry, I was waiting for you to leave so I wouldn’t have to be seen in this,” says someone wearing a grimy McFogg the Dog costume. Halloween truly is when the dead come out to play. (End)

~

  1. You keep typing. As you bullshit another contradictory point, you suddenly get the feeling of being watched. Jesus Joy Johnson. You swear you see someone — something — almost humanoid but disfigured standing in the unlit hallway to your right. Do you:

A) Ignore whoever or whatever it is and work; the only thing scarier than creepy things in a small space is my paradoxical lazy perfectionism. (Go to 2)

 B) Get a closer look. What’ll it do, kill me? Oh no, no assignment to do! :(( (Go to 4) 

~

  1. Packing up, you head towards RCB and the noise. It’s bizarre seeing it so dark and empty. You start chuckling to yourself about your cranium also being dark and empty when you’re interrupted by a piercing scratch against the bricks in a hallway to your immediate left. Do you:

A) Turn around and go the fuck home. That’s no TA I want to talk to. Mind you, I don’t even talk to my own TAs when I need help with assignments, so . . . (Go to 1)

B) Examine the source. The only thing I fear is computer science, and that department isn’t even in RCB. (Go to 3)

Board Shorts — October 16, 2020

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Image: Irene Lo

Written by: Mahdi Dialden, News Writer

 

Embark Storage Room Allocation 

The Board made a decision regarding a storage room previously allocated for Embark Sustainability in the Student Union Building. Embark expressed that they do not need the room, which resulted in the decision to remove the room from their space allocation. 

Discussion on Black and Indigenous advocacy at SFU

Some time was allocated towards discussion and concerns regarding BIPOC advocacy at SFU.  

VP Student Services Matthew Provost noted the support they received in response to the First Nations Student Association’s (FNSA) call to action letter. Provost stated, “It’s nice to see the amount of allyship that has been shown from students and the amount of momentum that the letter and calls to action have been getting.” Provost added that it’s “very draining and it’s shameful for students to take on this work while being in school and having other obligations and doing this.”

It was also mentioned that the BIPOC committee will be holding a meeting calling for a direct response to the FNSA’s letter and to advocate for BIPOC allyship. The Board invited SFU President Joy Johnson to join. 

SFU Sustainability office presents the Strategic Sustainability Plan 2025

Kayla Block, Associate Director of the Sustainability Office, presented the Sustainability Plan 2025 to the Board. The three main goals of the plan are: “Developing and applying innovation and climate change mitigation to all of our decisions, operational decisions and practices.” Secondly, “to create a space for researchers, faculty, and staff to all work together and develop into climate solutions.” Lastly, “increasing the visibility of climate action leaders at SFU, providing them training and support, and then also providing training and support.”  

There are two groups that have been formed to implement these goals, the first being an advisory council, which is the governance aspect of the plan. “This is a diverse group of stakeholders who will kind of oversee the plan. They will view action plans, they will provide advice on strategies to achieve the targets and they’ll review any final reports before they go to the VPs and the president,” Block stated. The second implementation is the target working groups, for 16 different targets (shifting to renewable energy, reducing food waste, increasing plant-based food items). Each working group will be tasked to meet their target, provide data, and report to the community on their progress.

More information on the plan can be found on the SFU website

The next SFSS Board meeting is planned for October 30 at 1 p.m. 

Top Ten 2020 Halloween Costumes

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Very calm, very cool. Nothing wrong here. Illustration: Siloam Yeung / The Peak

By: Juztin Bello, Copy Editor

  1. The debate fly

As the breakout star of the VP Debate, this meme-turned-costume is kind of filthy, relevant to current events, and at the exPence of a shitty politician — perfectly encapsulating 2020. While you could just dress up like Michael Pencil with a fly in his hair, that would be uninventive and very telling of your morals. I mean, just think about it: why would you dress up like an insignificant, weak, dirty, spineless maggot, when you could dress up as a fly?

2. Carole Baskin’s dead husband

Remember that phase of quarantine when Tiger King was a thing during 2020’s five-year-long March? Who could forget the m̶u̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ tiger Queen herself, miss Carole Baskin, and the mystery behind her ex-husband Don Lewis’ “disappearance?” Now, as someone who seldom trusts a white woman in a flower crown, I know that this giant-pussy-lovin’ activist definitely murdered her ex-husband. So why not pay homage to Mr. Tiger-grub himself and go as him for Halloween! All the cool cats and kittens will love your pop-culture phantom fit so much you’ll be Baskin in the attention you crave — except, unlike Carole, you won’t have to kill a man to get it. 

3. A Notes app apology

“Hey guys, I never thought I’d be doing this, but I just want to be completely transparent with you all . . .” blah blah blah. If you’ve seen a celebrity post this type of discourse on social media, then you’ve unfortunately witnessed the most empty attempt of owning up to mistakes out there. Dressing up like a Notes app apology is easy, given that these apologies themselves are basically just glorified disguises manipulative people use to hide their ignorance and lack of social awareness. You could literally just stick a piece of paper on you that says “I’m sorry I guess,” since that’s about as much effort people put into these apologies.

4. The diversity character for a Netflix original

As a year that has seen the rise of performative activism and virtue signalling, a perfect 2020 costume would be a character thrown into a Netflix TV show/movie that solely exists to hit a diversity quota. This costume is pretty easy if you’re already a minority; you just have to go somewhere with a bunch of privileged-looking people, stand in the background, and not say anything. And middle-class, able-bodied, cisgender, heterosexual white person reading this, I know what you’re thinking — but no, this costume is not for you. 

5. Trump’s tax debt

While the obvious choice would be dressing as Trump himself, this writer feels that, much like Trump’s “tan”, this costume seems a little overdone. The next best thing would be something that Trump himself finds horrifying, gets people talking, and is completely unexpectedly expected: that’s right, why not go as the taxes Trump failed to pay? You think the rich find monsters and try-hard pun costumes terrifying? No, of course not! Instead, confront them with accountability and the reality that they aren’t above the working class. That’ll get them screaming. 

6. An impostor

This Halloween, take this opportunity to dress up like one of those sus, cylindrical little bitches and find out which of your neighbours is the impostor. Is it your stiff, old neighbour who glares at you and your dog on your walks to make sure neither of you shit on his lawn? Is it the meathead down the road who drives 70 down your residential street and yelled at your friend for puking in front of their house before the Uber came? Or is it actually just you, who continues to uphold the image that you’re perfectly collected and unaffected by the numerous tasks you’ve yet to do that will probably kill you if you attempt completing all of them?

7. C a k e (???)

2020 has been a year of questioning, and one of the biggest questions on everyone’s mind has to do with one thing: cake. In spite of numerous 2020 atrocities, the questioning of whether things are actually cake tops this year’s list for “Why and how is this a thing?” Why not play into this confusion? Put some crumbs in your pocket and leave them in your path to really play up your cakiness. Or, if you want to play the “laying it on thick” game, you could cover your naked body in icing; that’ll really have your friends questioning whether or not you’re actually cake. But then again . . . how do you know you’re not made of cake? . . .

8. A shit ton of moths

Mothpocalypse really swarmed BC this year. Arriving during the height of the forest fire smoke, their timing was almost as good as SFU’s tuition increase during a pandemic — the biggest difference, of course, being that the moths didn’t make any excuses for their sudden appearance. And while one might oppose dressing up like the butterfly’s ugly twin, in truth, moths depict exactly what everyone is trying to do this year: searching for the goddamn light. 

9. Elon Musk’s child, X AE A-XII

I’ll be honest, Elon Musk absolutely terrifies me. And knowing that this man has offspring is possibly the next scariest thing. When word came out about Elon’s child with a literal formula for a name, people were rightfully amused. But rest assured, we shant be laughing for long, for once this all-powerful being becomes old enough to take over Elon’s empire, we’re all doomed. This child has access to all of the secrets of the universe and the inheritance to do whatever he wants with said information. Now is the time we must begin paying respect to our future ruler by honouring him through costume and hailing his name. No being, human or extraterrestrial, shall surpass the future energy conservation king. A L L H A I L X AE A-XII. 

10. 2020 itself

Naturally, the only thing that could round out this list would be dressing up like the entirety of the shitshow that is 2020. There are plenty of ways you can replicate this year’s landmark disasters: dressing up like a tree and setting yourself on fire, wearing a hazmat suit that’s also on fire, or literally just setting yourself on fire with no costume because, let’s be real, that’s actually how 2020 feels. I could humour the idea of dressing up as a (white) cop who hasn’t faced consequences for his actions, someone who refuses to wear a mask in the middle of a pandemic, a Republican, or something on a similar, utterly thoughtless wavelength, but something tells me the only people who would wear these “costumes” wouldn’t really be dressing up at all.

Your Halloween Horrorscopes

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An illustration of a girl with long flowing hair. Astrological signs and stars shine around her.
ILLUSTRATION: Marissa Ouyang / The Peak

By: Kyla Dowling, SFU Student

Aries: You just had to ask, “how could 2020 get any worse?” Now, we’re looking at a year-end zombie apocalypse thanks to your cynicism. Why pay for therapy to be told you’re “a threat to society” when you could just transform into a loud, violent creature and feel more like yourself than ever before?

Taurus: The stars are telling you to express how you really feel, Taurus. Cut off all your friends. Scream into a moldy pumpkin. Commit to your organic, GMO-free diet by eating the hearts of everyone who says dressing up as a cop for Halloween “isn’t even that bad.” 

Gemini: Is that really your Halloween costume, or are you looking to be casted in a porn parody of Zootopia? Either way, Halloween is the perfect excuse to rock bunny ears, pretend you aren’t a furry, and then sadly take jello shots and crank Megan thee Stallion all alone thanks to ‘rona. Happy Halloween!

Cancer: You’ve made some pumpkin-spiced lube from the tears of your classmates hearing you be the devil’s advocate, and you’re ready to try it with your boo. Your “boo” may be a BPK lab skeleton dressed in an off-brand Pikachu costume, but it beats your typically fragile ego every other cuffing season. 

Leo: Pumpkins aren’t the only guts you’re getting into this Halloween season. You know the drill — keep the seeds away at all times. If you’re looking to spice things up in the bedroom, you could try some sexy Chucky/Chucky’s-bride roleplaying. Or just stop being such a pillow princess for once.

Virgo: If you were in a horror movie, you’d certainly never move into a haunted house on top of a hill to finally be left the fuck alone. Mind you, even if you did, any demons bugging you certainly beat the people you’re forced to be around during your monthly Wal-Mart runs.

Libra: Your dream of recreating Romeo and Juliet in the 1996 Baz Lurhmann film doesn’t have to be ruined by the pandemic, Libra! Find your own bootleg DiCaprio — probably some business major still gelling their hair for Zoom classes. Then, die side-by-side at a Halloween party from COVID-19 instead of poison. 

Scorpio: It’s your season, and all eyes are on you, Scorpio. No, seriously. Where did you get all those eyes you’re holding? I know you’re ~dark and edgy~, but this is kind of disturbing. Can you — can you put them back? Wait. Back up. What are you doing with that scalpel? Someone hel—

Sagittarius: Happy Halloween, Sag! Well, “happy” is a bit of a reach, since your crush decided to ghost you this spooky season. But you still have time to get cuffed! Remember, if all else fails, you could always dress up as a video game controller this Halloween. Maybe then someone will finally hold you. 

Capricorn: Nothing could ever scare you —  except the ghost haunting you because you didn’t forward chainmail in 2007. But don’t forget: fear is an aphrodisiac. Give the ghost a chance! Your friends might all have “loving relationships” and “a life”, but they can’t say they’ve been railed by the supernatural.

Aquarius: I hate to break it to you, Aquarius, but Beetlejuice is a TikTok thing now. Put away that pinstripe suit you spent hours trying to find at Value Village. Save your green hair dye for when the Joker becomes a niche costume. Look for something a little more unique in your life — once your glasses stop fogging up from your mask. 

Pisces: The Halloween full moon will influence you, Pisces. Invest in a flowing nightgown. Sneak into the abandoned asylum downtown, wailing loudly down its halls. You’ll still be crying about forgetting to buy Pilsbury pumpkin sugar cookies, but at least your mysterious aura will drown out how narcissistic you are. Almost.