As far as light beers go, this one’s the shit – the literal shit
By Adam Dewji
I bet you’ve seen those stupid commercials on TV for the Molson 67 beer, with some dude going jogging so he can enjoy a badass burger and an apparently palatable bottle of beer.
He sits down at a table in a bar with his friends, confident that he knows what he’s doing, and then tears a bite out of the burger. Notice that he has also ordered a Molson 67. Notice also that he never touches his goddamn drink. He looks at the waitress’s hand and takes a mean bite out of his burger with a look on his face that says “Oh hell no! I’mma eat this burger!”
Who markets their beer with its calorie count in the name, calls it a “guyet” beer, and then claims it’s not a diet beer? Who are diets for, then, anyways, demales?’
Sometimes you have to spell it out for people. It’s like running over your neighbour’s dog in front of their face, and then claiming that the dog ran into your tires.
There’s no person that I know, man nor woman, who would give two fucks about how many calories are in their goddamn beer, especially when they order a 2,000-calorie burger and fries combo. The drink tastes so bad, it’s like their food would have to be a chase for every sip of their Molson 67. Any calories you avoid by drinking it in lieu of a real beer would be negated by the need to cover the taste with the nearest food item.
This has got to be the worst excuse for a beer I’ve ever had (and I’ve had close to 300 kinds.) If you bought a Molson and pissed in it, it would probably have more flavor. This tastes like someone took half a bottle of Molson light and half a glass of water, mixed
it together and called it beer. You’d be better off dressing up a pile of dog shit in a sweater and putting it up for adoption.
If you’ve “always wondered” about what it would taste like, let me give you an idea: it should come with directions on the bottle for how to consume it, reading “Pour directly in toilet.” The three per cent alcohol-by-volume shows that this has a fraction of the alcohol content of a normal beer. Too bad it doesn’t even come close to having a fraction of the taste.
Think of another “light” econo-lager that some people actually drink, like a Bud Light, Miller Lite, or maybe just stick to water. You could always walk around for 10 minutes and earn the extra calories to drink a real beer, too.
Want a cheap lager that’s actually really smooth, and also in the same price range (cheaper than Molson 67)? Pick up a case of High Country Kolsch by Mt. Begbie Brewing.
Don’t waste your money. Buy a good beer, then take a guilt trip to the gym the next day like the rest of us. Just because it’s on Hockey Night in Canada doesn’t mean it’s worth drinking.
