HUMOUR
Horoscopes January 30 – February 5
January 30, 2023By: Hana Hoffman, Peak Associate Aries In this mysterious world full of unexpected coincidences, you are someday destined to end up in the same tutorial class as Ariel from The Little Mermaid. Aww, Aries and Ariel are going to be right next to each other on the alphabetical attendance list so when the instructor splits the list into groups for discussions, you two will always be in the same group! Please tell me about the interesting conversation when she tells you all about how she went from living in the big blue sea to enrolling at SFU as a human…
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Top ten ways to receive sweet, sweet academic validation
January 25, 2023By: Hana Hoffman, SFU Student Go around campus on Halloween week Well, if you want something sweet, then get it on Halloween week. No matter where your grades are at, you’ll find sweet rewards everywhere. Who cares if it’s unrelated…
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SFU announces “SF-uper BFF” app to curb anti-social reputation
January 24, 2023By: Hannah Kazemi, Staff Writer SFU is known to be a commuter school with a reputation for being a difficult place to make friends. In an attempt to improve this reputation, SFU admin has announced the launch of a new…
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Horoscopes January 23–29
January 23, 2023By: Isabella Urbani, scathing Sagittarius hater and proud Leo Aries According to the ethereal Star girlbosses, we are supposed to be soulmates. In that case, you’re gonna Have to change the spelling of your sign name. Why do we call…
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Reasons you should drop this class
January 23, 2023By: Maya Beninteso, Peak Associate Dear pitiful student enrolled in CLAS 101, Greetings, my name is Maya. Goodness, would I hate to be you. I’m not quite sure if you’re aware, but this course puts the “ass” in CLAS(S) 101.…
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Spirit of British Columbia flips out for Instagram flop outs
January 20, 2023By: Clarence Ndabahwerize, Staff Writer SAANICH — Shortly after departing Swartz Bay at 7:00 p.m., the Spirit of British Columbia put out a distress call signalling that it was sinking. Rescue boats were on the scene shortly after, and no…
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Horoscopes: January 9–13
January 19, 2023By: Hannah Kazemi, Staff Writer, extremely judgemental Aries This is your year to be AGGRESSIVE, Aries. Start using periods in those texts and assert your opinions without cushioning it with uncomfortable laughter because you are unsure. You are always right!…
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SFU releases “best” college admission essay to help incoming students
January 18, 2023By: Isabella Urbani, Sports Editor To prospective SFU students: Please use this essay submission as a reference of a successful applicant. The prompt was “Why is SFU the best fit for you?” Please note especially our excellent legacy of being…
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Ten problems only SFU students have
January 16, 2023By: Saije Rusimovici, Staff Writer Frequent Flooding Why put a bathroom on every corner if half of them are out of service? Nobody wants to walk by the same paper towel-less, puddle-filled bathroom on their way to their classroom every…
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SFUnexplained: I can’t escape Freud
January 15, 2023By: Kelly Chia, Humour Editor Everywhere I go . . . I see his face. Sigmund (hopefully not motherfucking) Freud. It was innocuous at first: he would come up, obviously, in my PSYC 101 class. I get it, we all…
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Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.
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For promotional inquiries: [email protected]
Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.
For advertising inquiries: [email protected]
For promotional inquiries: [email protected]