Gary Lim
The fuck-it list: The things you didn’t accomplish over the summer and why they would have sucked anyways
July 30, 2012By Gary Lim Well, shit. Summer’s almost over, isn’t it? I mean, sure, you have August, but once you account for all the time you plan to spend lamenting the end of summer, coupled with the week that it’ll probably rain, not to mention exams, you’re looking at about, let’s see . . . carry the three . . . about 37 minutes of summer. Where did all that time go? I mean, yeah, there was the weekend you spent lying around the house with the curtains drawn, drifting in and out of consciousness. But you only did that…
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Stuff We Hate: Children & Algeria
July 30, 2012Children Having children is a lot like snorting coke — you pay a ridiculous amount of money just to make yourself incredibly annoying to everyone around you. Other people’s babies can be cute, when they haven’t learned to talk, or…
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Horoscopes: June 30th
July 30, 2012Aries (March 21 – April 20) Scorpions! Scorpions everywhere! In your shoes, in your mout — Oh wait, sorry that’s this week’s Horrorscope. My mistake. Taurus (April 21 – May 21) This week’s winning Taurus is Kathleen Mayweather of Akron,…
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Petter Watch: July 30th
July 30, 2012Petter contemplates Zen and the meaning of life while working on his Harley Davidson.
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Word on the Street: July 30th
July 30, 2012Q:So, the Summer Olympics officially kicked off last Friday with opening ceremonies in London. Thoughts? “You yanks must have a couple roos loose in the paddock. Else why’d you be holding the Summer Olympics in the middle of bleedin’…
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News Beat: July 30th
July 30, 2012SFU professor wins world record for thickest accent In a small ceremony held in Convocation Mall last Saturday, Guinness World Record officials awarded SFU professor of computing science, Ranjeet Chupala, the distinct honour of having the world’s thickest accent. Competing…
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Ask Mystic Gary: Bullies
July 23, 2012By Gary Lim Dear Mystic Gary, Over the last month, I’ve noticed some oddities in regard to my six-year-old. He’s been staying after school much later, and when he does finally come home, he’s missing his backpack or his clothes…
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Pizza Hands: Pigeon Warfare
July 23, 2012By April Alayon,Gary Lim and Will Ross
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Horoscopes: July 23rd
July 23, 2012Aries (March 21 – April 20) Good news! This week you can expect your baleen to absolutely overflow with krill. (Note: This week’s horoscope only applies to grey whales) Taurus (April 21 – May 21) Like the bull, this week…
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Campus Update: July 16, 2012
July 16, 2012SFU voted 394th in top 1,000 over 1,000 In a recent polling conducted by popular Canadian news magazine MacLeans, SFU was ranked 394st, dropping 7 spots from its 2012 ranking. The 1,000 over 1,000 ranks the top 1,000 post-secondary insititutions…
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