Gary Lim
Your Fault: Handy tips on surviving the next earthquake
November 5, 2012Our humble little province was hit with a 7.7 magnitude quake off the coast of the Haida Gwai last week, and while there were no reported causalities or injurie,s a 7.7 quake is still nothing to sneeze at, particularly if you don’t want your nose ripped off your face and shoved down your left bronchus by the cold, unfeeling pincers of Mother Nature. Fortunately though, this particular quake happened pretty much in the middle of nowhere, and caused no significant damage. Unfortunately, this might be neither the worst nor the end of it. If you’ve paid any attention in your…
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Horoscopes
November 5, 2012Aries (March 21 – April 20) Avoid looking a gift horse in the mouth this week, as horses’ mouths are pretty gross. Taurus (April 21 – May 21) Look, it’s not Taurus’s fault that buying those lottery tickets didn’t pan…
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Jokes for English Majors: T.S. Eliot
November 5, 2012By Gary Lim By Eleanor Qu
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NHL Lockout continues, A-M, O-Z HLs thrilled
November 5, 2012As lockout enters second month, fans increasingly desperate; smoking their own scabs By Gary Lim VANCOUVER — Roger’s Arena stands empty. Where there should be crowds of cheering fans clad in blue and green, instead the stands lie bare, save…
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Petter sits down Woodward’s to talk about the about the new campus on the way
November 5, 2012After an uncharacteristically silent dinner last Saturday night, SFU president Andrew Petter reportedly waited until bed time before sitting down with the Woodward’s campus to explain the changes that would soon be coming to the extended SFU family. These new…
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Mitt Romney’s five adult sons form Mormon boy band
November 5, 2012[caption id="attachment_65294" align="aligncenter" width="614"] The Romney clan expects to have bred their own broadway musical cast by 2015.[/caption] By Gary Lim Photo by Associated Press Startling news came out from the American Music Awards last Sunday, when the…
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Petter Watch: Nov 5, 2012
November 5, 2012Petter switches to a safety pin after stabbing himself repeatedly with poppy.
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Peak Humour Costume Catalogue!
October 29, 2012Sexy Hoarder I want to hoard your hand Sexy War of 1812 I get to be on top this time, eh …
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