Alyssa Umbal
Clapback from the backpacks
October 20, 2023By: C Icart, Humour Editor Alright, some serious backpack slander happened in this paper last week, and we’re not just going to lie down and take it. Who is we, you ask? Everyone sensible enough to know that backpacks are vastly superior to tote bags. First of all, we’re not even surprised you couldn’t get your bag facts straight when you’re busy walking around looking like the leaning Tower of Pisa with your overflowing tote weighing you down on one side. We don’t even know why you call that thing a tote, and not a bucket, because walking around with…
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Bargaining team brushing up on their stalling tactic skills
October 10, 2023By: Sude Guvendik, Staff Writer Ah, the sweet symphony of bureaucracy. It’s like a finely tuned orchestra playing the most annoying melody you’ve ever heard. As the TSSU battles it out for a fair contract, the employer’s bargaining team has…
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Creative Corner: Five economic ways to spice up your home this fall
September 28, 2023By: Saije Rusimovici, Staff Writer I’ve spent the last few weeks upping my home decorating game. There’s something about cute and colourful organizers in my workspace and a string of fairy lights over my bed that makes a home feel…
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Canvas to ban phrases “I agree with you” and “jumping off what you just said”
September 26, 2023By: Chloe Arneson, Peak Associate SFU News —- In a groundbreaking move that’s set to change the way we communicate with our fellow students online, Canvas has unveiled its new chatbot to rid academia of dreaded copycat commenters. Are you…
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Please stop coming to class
September 18, 2023By: Sude Guvendik, Staff Writer Okay, it’s been a week; please stop being on campus all at the same time. Ah, the start of a new semester! There’s nothing quite like the buzz of activity in the AQ. Well, actually,…
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We can’t forget disabled queers during pride
July 31, 2023By: Michelle Young, Opinions Editor Editor's note: This piece was written before the Vancouver Pride Society announced an accessible viewing zone with mask mandates in place, in response to community concerns. Vancouver Pride is coming up this August. It’s supposed…
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Course enrollment chaos is upon us
July 27, 2023By: Hailey Miller, Peak Associate Ah, the sweet smell of course enrollment stress is in the air. The time has come to battle the Hunger Games of registration, “and may the odds be ever in your favour.” Tension rises as…
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Will U-Pass Your Summer Course?
July 19, 2023By: Hana Hoffman, Peak Associate and C Icart, Humour Editor Dear Peakie, I was at the movies watching The Little Mermaid because, duh, and the fire alarm went off, and we had to evacuate! So obviously, I complain to the…
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Top ten reasons to stress about midterms
June 29, 2023By: Hailey Miller, SFU Student Well, fellow students, it’s that time of the semester again. The blissful midterm season is in full swing. This year’s summer midterm agenda is overflowing with all-nighters, last-minute cram sessions, regrets of “why did I…
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My spice tolerance is embarrassing
June 23, 2023By: Isabella Urbani, Staff Writer Have you had the miserable experience of dealing with someone who can’t take a hint? Can’t take no for an answer? And somehow thinks sweet chilli chips (I’m talking about the Doritos version) are spicy.…
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