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Scientists discover new way of pronouncing ‘quinoa’

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WEB-quinoa-mark-burnham

 

Language researchers stumble on new way to articulate popular grain

 

By Gary Lim
Photos By Mark Burnham

 

ZEVEN – German scientists of the Spachinstitut Von Zeven (The Zeven Institute of Language) made headlines earlier this week after announcing their recent discovery of a previously unknown way of pronouncing the word “Quinoa”.

 

Quinoa, which has been on the collective palates and vocabularies of the western world since Oprah ate some in 2006 or something, has experienced a massive popularity boom in the last few years and has found its way into all manner of food it was never meant to be in, ranging from smoothies to bubblegum.

 

Originally the staple crop of the various Andean mountain peoples, they can no longer afford to buy the crop that has represented the majority of their diet since the time they settled the region. Now they are reduced to picking the crop to sell to hungry North Americans. But while North American tongues love grain’s slightly bitter and earthy flavours, they still struggle with the pronounciation of it.

 

Against every logical conclusion, the word Quinoa is pronounced “keen-wa” instead of the much more sensible “kwinoa”. The alternate pronounciation completely by accident in one of the German language labs when head researcher Fritz Vensel asked his research assistant Klara Viffenstein for a “kleenex” with a mouth full of schnitzel and through his greasy, meat-flecked articulation, the assistant misheard bringing him a bowl of the popular chenopod pseudograin instead.

 

Described as a mixture of the two original pronounciations with a healthy dose of umlauts sprinkled in, the new technical pronouncation of quinoa is / knooèwyä/.

Although the new pronounciation has yet to be rolled out for the public usage, reports are already coming in from Seattle, Vancouver and notably Portland of people derisively turning their noses up on others for mispronouncing the word. Screen printing shop owner and generally intolerable human being Celena Moon-Frye spoke with The Peak about the new enunciation of the popular South American grain.

 

“Oh Kweenooi, yeah, that food is so good. Nothing like a queenioa and summer squash winter broth. Or a Cuenoiwa and Spinach quiche. That sounds so good right now,” added Moon-Frye without a trace of self-awareness. As of press time, the new pronounciation has been rendered completely irrelevant by the introduction of Czkeltelachetwicquanizkobap, a newer tastier grain from the coast of Argentina, pronounced “corn.”

Doctors unable to find methanol in “poisoned” SFU students; balls neither

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fb5e5da5-bf0e-4bbc-a18f-a9509045e2c7

 

By Gary Lim
BALI — An international studies class from SFU made national news early morning today after being involved in a brief scare where it was believed the students had consumed methanol-laced alcohol.

After lengthy examination by doctors during a stay at the Sanglah Public Hospital, it was discovered the symptoms experienced by the students stemmed not from consumption of any toxic substances but rather from a case of them “being total pussies.”

Chief physician on call, Dr. Joseph Ocampo, descibes what happened that night. “Their professor brought in 13 of [the students] at 11 p.m. Thursday night. The students were unresponsive to questioning and several had reportedly been crying and vomiting earlier in the evening.”

“We were prepping them up for a tox-screen, specifically asking them what they’d been drinking earlier. But then their group leader told us they’d had almost an entire mickey of Fireball between them and that the students spent the last several hours telling each other how much they loved them.” We immediately diagnosed then each of them with a severe case of FLW. Fucking lightweight syndrome.

“Hahahahahahaahha,”added Dr. Ocampo high-fiving his collegues.

The Peak was able to get in contact with the leader of the group, anthropology professor Dr. Dana Paxton via phone from the hospital lobby.

“We suffered a real scare today. Usually I just swap out their regular beer for the non-alcoholic stuff I grab from the Bintang Seminyak (Indonesian grocery chain), then me and the TAs get shittered in our rooms. But I guess we missed the Fireball, didn’t really consider that to be alcohol. I guess I’ll be more careful next time. ”

One student was crying in the hallway, begging the gathered crowd of CBC reporters not to tell her parents.

As of press time, all 13 students were wide awake and excitedly conversing about how hung-over they were going to be when they were done being drunk.

Peakcast #1

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Editors David Dyck, Will Ross, and Rachel Braeuer on using rape jokes and the best movies of 2012.

New theatre on Burnaby campus opens for events

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new theatre

Recently renovated theatre to be home of lectures rather than thespians

By Alexis Lewton-Smith
Photo By Vaikunthe Banerjee

A new year generally coincides with new things, and in the wake of the holidays people gain resolutions, gifts, and even a clean slate. SFU’s Burnaby campus also gained something new this year: a renovated theatre. The renovations are the only ones that have been done since the theatre was built in 1965, and in a complete overhaul, new seats fill the theatre, new flooring lines the stage, and a new audiovisual system has been installed.

Basically, the theatre has had an extreme makeover, and it shows. Prior to its repair, the theatre housed the theatrical productions for SFU’s contemporary arts program, but since the program’s relocation to the Woodward’s campus, the theatre has sat empty. Lynda Hewitt, SFU event coordinator, said that the theatre was in pretty bad shape before the renovation, but now has new potential: “It looked awful and horrifically tired. This is an optimum space and it was just sitting empty . . . the renovations allow for more diversity in events.”

The new theatre aims to host a variety of events, such as banquets, speakers, lectures, and student affairs. So far, few events have taken place, but the ideal space is only beginning to show its usefulness. “We are slowly trying out different events. [In December] we had the student orchestra do their Christmas concert here. We have tried a few of the easy ones out — kind of a soft opening to see what works and what doesn’t work,” said Lynda. The theatre will also allow for the campus to be involved with events that include a large number of attendees: “We are trying to create the atmosphere where we are not constantly saying no to people [because we don’t have the space],” she says.

But where does this leave the dramatic arts-hungry individuals who spend most of their time up on the hill? Could this also be a new dawn for theatrical productions up on the mountain? Well, not exactly. While the theatre has a new look, it won’t necessarily house elaborate productions because it doesn’t have the required lighting. In addition, the artists of SFU no longer reside on the Burnaby Campus — they now showcase their work in the bustling downtown core at SFU Woodwards. However, the Goldcorp Centre for the Performing Arts is a stunning and immaculate space, and the newly renovated theatre just doesn’t compare.

The Burnaby campus theatre will, however, try to do as much as possible, and perhaps feature some overflow performances: “We are looking for student events, or people coming from off the hill — Shadbolt [Centre for the Arts] and those kinds of things. We are looking for a variety of events, as it has the visual capabilities for a lecture theatre and a bit more” Lynda says. While it is unfortunate that SFU’s Burnaby Campus may not have elaborate productions, it will have interesting speakers, some performances, and many events of various kinds. The theatre also aims to have a liquor license, so the possibility of grabbing a drink at the theatre may help relieve any perceived shortcomings.

If you are still craving a little more in terms of the performing arts, there are many options in and around Vancouver. The Vancouver Theatre Guide is a great place to look, as are the event listings for SFU’s contemporary arts program. After all, it’s only a short bus or Skytrain ride to the SFU Woodward’s campus, and our artists could always use the support.

Build SFU moves forward

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The project has hired a manager, reopened the Think Tank, and is focusing on finding an architect

By Alison Roach
Photo by Mark Burnham

Last Friday, the Build SFU Think Tank space on the MBC 2000 level was reopened in an event attended by approximately 75 people, including students, SFSS staff, administrators, and president Petter. The reopening marks the project looking forward into the new year, focusing mainly around student consultations and the hiring of an architect firm for the planned SUB building.

The reopening was celebrated with cake and faux-champagne, and featured short speeches from SFSS president Lorenz Yeung and president Andrew Petter. The growing need for studentspace was acknowledged, and the opportunities the Think Tank space will provide for students. “Over the last 20 years, SFU has grown dramatically,” said Yeung, “And as the student population increases so does the value of student space.” Yeung continued, “Students will have the opportunity to share their opinions from colour scheme, to the furniture, however many stools you want . . . and thus, students can take ownership of the building.” Marc Fontaine, who has been hired by Build SFU as the manager of the project, echoed the same sentiment. In an interview with The Peak, Fontaine said, “If the student society didn’t have this department created — this Build SFU project department — then it could easily turn out to be a building that isn’t right for students.” He cited the MBC building, which was originally meant to act as a SUB, as a warning of how the project could be handled poorly. Fontaine has been heavily involved in student government in the past as SFSS University Relations Officer, as well as holding positions on both the Senate and the SFU Board of Governors.

In his new role, Fontaine will be focused on organizing and facilitating student consultations through the Think Tank space, social media, 1presentations and events on all three campuses. Said Fontaine, “That’s the most important part of my role: to have the Think Tank, to have a space where students can participate in the project, so they can stay informed about the project and knowledgeable about it.” Fontaine also assured that no expense will be spared in the consultation process, there not even being a set budget in place.

The next step in the project is hiring an architecture firm to create the design for the building. Fontaine explained that Build SFU received 16 proposals from architecture firms around the world, and those choices have now been narrowed down to three bids. These three firms will be presented in an open forum to students in the MBC atrium on Jan. 30 at 4:30pm. Fontaine emphasized the importance of whichever architecture firm is selected being involved in the student consultation process. Said Fontaine, “I have been looking for firms that seem to understand the purpose of the student building . . . and whether they’ll be able to engage with students to understand the issues facing students and the desires of students for this building.” In his address at the Think Tank reopening, president Petter linked the project back to engagement, saying, “During all phases of the project’s development, this Think Tank will be a hub for participation and dialogue, and is going to provide another opportunity for engagement.”

Looking forward, Fontaine and to-be-hired full time staff will be managing the Think Tank space, encouraging students to come in, talk about the building, and write their ideas on a wall-spanning whiteboard. Emphasized Fontaine, “We need to make it convenient for students to talk to us about their building.”

SFU receives 8.7M in funding from CFI

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The announcement was made last Tuesday at SFU by the federal government

By Amara Janssens
Photos courtesy of PAMR

On Jan. 15 2013, the Honourable James Moore, Minister of Canadian Heritage and Official Languages made a national announcement at Simon Fraser University that $215 million will be awarded to research institutions across the country. The Government of Canada, through the Canadian Foundation for Innovation (CFI) will be funding university campuses, research institutes and hospitals. In total, 34 institutions and 75 projects were awarded funding. Moore says this funding “will help our universities attract top-notch researchers,” while ensuring Canada continues to be a global leader in science and technology.

SFU is involved with two national research projects that have attracted $8,715,700 of the federal funding: the Prometheus Project and the ATLAS Tier-1 Data Analysis Centre. “Today’s announcement will help SFU,” said SFU president Andrew Petter last Tuesday. “It’s wonderful news for us, and I thank you very much.”

The Prometheus Project is receiving $7,715,700 in funding and involves material science and engineering (MS&E) innovation. Over 20 scientists from SFU, the University of British Columbia, British Columbia Institute of Technology, and the University of Victoria have collaborated on this project, while over 1,200 students from these partner institutions have been involved in the project. The extra federal funding will help the project create prototypes“ closing the gap between invention and innovation,” CFI says.

The second project involving SFU is ATLAS Tier-1 Data Analysis Centre, which is receiving $1 million in funding from CFI. This project is led by SFU physics professor, Mike Vetterli, in collaboration with scientists from TRIUMF, Carleton University, McGill University, UBC, University of Alberta, UVic, University of Toronto, Universite de Montreal, York University, as well as various other academic institutions from around the globe. The Tier-1 Data Analysis Centre is located at TRIUMP Vancouver, and analyzes data from the ATLAS experiment (the multipurpose particle detector inside an atom-smashing collider housed at CERN in Geneva). The $1 million of funding will upgrade the equipment at the Tier-1 centre at TRIUMP Vancouver, which will help analyze an increased amount of data.

According to CFI, Atlas Canada is one of the largest projects in the country for high-energy physics. Created by the Government of Canada in 1997, CFI works to increase Canada’s research and technology capacity. Through investing in Canadian universities, colleges, research hospitals, and non-profit research institutions, CFI hopes to attract the world’s best researchers. In turn, this supports business innovation and private sector research and development.

Canadian institutions must apply to CFI to receive funding. Applicant funding approval is based on quality of research, need for infrastructure, ability to strengthen the capacity for innovation, and how the research benefits Canada.

University Briefs – Jan. 21, 2013

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By Alison Roach

King’s College no longer under fire
After 24 years, King’s college can finally say that it meets fire codes, following two years of upgrading the institutions residences. King’s hasn’t been in compliance with fire codes since 1988, and was taken to court by the city of Halifax in 2010 because of the issue. The upgrades include new fire safety doors and exits in residences, a fire exit for the campus pub, and new fire detectors and self-closing doors in residence rooms. The cost of upgrades exceeded $657,000.

With files from The Watch

UBC holds $11.8 in staff’s interest-free mortgages
According to information obtained through the Freedom of Information Act, 47 UBC staff members were found to hold UBC-offered mortgages with their faculties paying the interest. The loans, which were given by the UBC treasury are referred to as “interest-free,” but actually do acquire interest. UBC defended the practice by citing Vancouver’s high housing costs, which necessitate the practice for faculty and administration recruitment.

With files from The Ubyssey

UVic announces next president
The University of Victoria has announced that its seventh president in office will be long-time law professor Jamie Cassels. Succeeding current president of 13 years David Turpin, Cassels will begin his five-year term in July. Cassels joined the Faculty of Law in 1981, and spent nine years as vice-president academic and provost.

With files from The Martlet

U of A researches dinosaur mating rituals
University of Alberta paleontology researcher Scott Persons has found that some feathered dinosaurs used to tail plumage to attract mates, much like modern-day peacocks and turkeys. Dinosaurs called oviraptors show a peculiar fusing together of vertebrae that formed a ridged, blade-like structure, which only birds have today. Persons argues that these tail feathers evolved as a means of waving the dinosaurs’ feathered tail fans.

With files from the U of A website

Study reveals wasp dating game

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Male wasps tag females, create harems

By Kristina Charania

In a lengthy study conducted at SFU, an unusual wasp courting method has been unearthed. Particular parasitoid male wasps of the species Ooencyrtus kuvana — no longer in size than the thickness of a nickel at two millimetres long — build a harem of virgin females through a pheromone-antenna tagging system, which better propagate the male wasp’s genes into the next generation of his offspring. “I assumed that [this tagging] was normal behaviour, or that I would see it in other insects and arthropods, but I haven’t seen anything like this in any other species,” said graduate student Kelly Ablard, head of the research team looking at O. kuvanae.

This past December, Ablard defended her PhD thesis at SFU, where she has analyzed O. kuvanae for the last six-and-a half years as a component of her degree. This particular discovery, however, was not an intentional one. It took over three years to run appropriate and conclusive tests. “My thesis was met with a lot of resistance,” said Ablard, “people were quite skeptical about it.” Her current findings have been published in the journal Behavioural Processes, New Scientist, and Canadian Geographic.

The study examined the harem gathering and guarding technique of the male wasp in both competitive and lax environments. By tapping his left antenna to hers, a male wasp tags an unmated female with an individual-specific, signature pheromone that marks her as taken and allows him to relocate her for later mating. After a female has been tagged, she will only reproduce with the wasp that tagged her: her mate. “The males recognize their own individual pheromone, and the females that they tag recognize only the male that marked them,” noted Ablard. “That in itself is amazing. It’s almost like giving your loved one an engagement ring.”

In non-competitive situations, the harem-gathering technique was not observed in Ablard’s wasps. Instead, male wasps mated with a female immediately upon finding her, referred to as the mate-at-once strategy. Ablard discovered that choice of tactic depends on rivalry posed by other male wasps, the distribution of females around him, and the health of the wasp in question. Wasps that employed harem gathering and guarding techniques tended to be faster than their mate-at-once counterparts and, as a result, are likely healthier.

By tagging virgin O. kuvanae females as permanently taken,harem gathering and guarding males can later revisit multiple tagged females, versus the less often-mated females of a mateat- once male, and mate withthem at his leisure without worries of competition from other wasps. This allows the owner of a harem to pass his genes onto the next generation in a larger volume. “Mate-at-once males will end up passing on their genes, maybe not as much as a harem gatherer, but they can still coexist with this type of male,” said Ablard. Evolutionarily, harem gathering and guarding is largely beneficial: mate-at-once males lose out on the mating opportunities.

A single mating takes one and a half minutes on average, and in a larger group where males are vying to mate with as many females as possible, “Time is critical,” said Ablard.

SFSS hires new food and beverage services manager

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Newcomer John Flipse looks to improve the sustainability of their services

By Alison Roach
Photos by Mark Burnham

The SFSS recently parted ways with former food and beverage service business manager John Laurin, hiring in his place a new John. John Flipse has worked in the service industry since the age of 16, and has been involved in service and management at various restaurants, chains, Vancouver hotels, and even a bar in Sydney, Australia.

A former SFU student himself, Flipse most recently worked in a catering management position for UBC, where he was offered a permanent position. However, he opted to come onboard as a non-unionized, contracted manager with the SFSS for the food and beverage services at the Burnaby campus, comprised of The Highland Pub, The Ladle, and Higher Grounds. In an interview with The Peak, Flipse stated that one aspect of the position that intrigued him is the potential for growth with the Build SFU project.

Flipse was put into the position mid-December, and spent the time before winter break observing how the service runs. He said, “They’ve got a food services operation that doesn’t seem to be functioning well, or not in the traditional sense of functioning.” He cites one example of a dishwasher part that The Highland had ordered, and had been waiting on for over a year. “I ordered it, it’s here. So now the guy in the dish pit doesn’t have to stand in a pool of water all day.”

Financial loss has been a continuous problem for the SFSS food and beverage services, with losses last year coming in at over $300,000. This is a concern that both Yeung and Flipse expressed the need to address. Said Flipse, “They don’t have to change things, it can run as is, and it’s been running for a long time. . . . But is it a sustainable business? Not in this current model.”

While SFSS president Lorenz Yeung emphasized that the split from former manager Laurin was amicable, he acknowledged that the relationship between the SFSS board and the food and beverage services was not well defined, and was causing difficulty.

Yeung stated, “Part of the process of changing the management was also formally establishing the relationship. We acknowledge that the board is not always entirely capable of managing the food and beverage service and that’s why we have management. We have to swallow our egos, swallow our pride.”

On the subject of Laurin, Flipse said: “I’ve heard some interesting stories. His reputation has preceded him in some cases, when I’m dealing with some people. What I hear is that it’s a nice change.”

During the hiring process, the board was impressed by Flipse’s outlook on the relationship between the board and the manager position, seeing it first and foremost as an advisory position. Flipse will be expected to liaise with the SFSS board and make recommendations based on his vast experience in the industry while still acknowledging that at the end of the day, the board is the boss. Flipse stated, “I don’t think they’ve ever been presented this information in a clear and understandable way . . . That’s why I’m here.” For the near future, Yeung and Flipse both expressed that all involved, including food and beverage service employees, are excited to see what the change in management and operation philosophy will bring.

New website prevents jetlag

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Jay Olson’s new site advises when to look for light to reduce fatigue

By Kelli Gustafson
Photos by Mark Burnham

SFU researcher Jay Olson has been making international headlines recently after launching a website to prevent jet lag.
The website, Jet Lag Rooster, was launched on Jan. 1, 2013. The Rooster allows the user to create a “jet lag plan,” simply by entering their departure and arrival city. The website then calculates a plan prescribing specific times of light exposure prior to departing. “Jet lag occurs when your body clock isn’t in sync with your environment,” Olson told The Peak during a recent interview. “Some researchers have found that if you expose your body to light at certain times, you can shift your body clock, and if you shift your body clock prior to flying, you can reduce or prevent jet lag.”

Olson first learned of using light exposure to reduce jet lag while he was studying psychology at SFU. He came up with the idea for the website after taking a trip to Greece years ago. “I spent the first week there completely jet lagged” said Olson. Olson’s own experience with jet lag is what motivated him to create a strategy that monitors light exposure in order to avoid jet lag.

Circadian rhythms are the biological rhythms within the body that prompt changes, such as body temperature and wakefulness. Light exposure is the most effective way to alter these rhythms. Olson applied this knowledge to create a method that calculates when to seek and avoid light in order to adjust one’s “body clock” to fit a new time zone. “The general thought is you just shift your schedule for when you land,” Olson stated.

However, this may cause greater problems contributing to jet lag. “If you happen to be exposed to light at the wrong times, [many] people become jet lagged for weeks, and their body clock just won’t shift. . . . It’ll start shifting one way and back or the other way and back.” Olson’s website presents a simple method which informs travelers when to seek and avoid light prior to traveling or upon arrival, thus preventing or lessening the effects of jet lag. Along with monitoring light exposure, Olson also recommends that travelers drink plenty of water during their flight and avoid caffeinated beverages. Apart from adjusting light exposure to avoid travel fatigue, Olson advised, “Drink a lot of water on the plane, and eat fruit.”

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Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

Contact us: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society 1965-2024

Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

Contact us:
[email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society 1965-2024