Hello my repentant subjects,
Sorry to rain on your parade, but it’s me, Rain! I know you’ve missed me. I thought I’d arrive fashionably late this season seeing as everyone loves to hate me. Lucky for you, I love the infamy (and the infamy loves me). Tell me, did you enjoy the sweltering sun in your concrete building you call a university? Did you enjoy shedding layers, in addition to tears, in your lecture halls? Did the tears that streamed down your blood-rushed cheeks make you think about . . . me?
You know what I enjoyed during my absence? How you all begged . . . so much for “rain, rain [to] go away.” Oh, how the times — and climate — have changed. It’s about time you thank me for saving you from the unseasonably hot October. Nooo, climate action can totally wait, that’s why you were wearing shorts and the air quality was just peachy. Oh, you know you love me, so why pretend otherwise?
And, if you fail to repay me properly, that is to say, voting in candidates that prioritize climate protections, maybe next year I’ll wait until November to make my appearance! Or maybe I simply won’t come back to teach you a lesson. I wonder how much you’ll miss me then. After all, you never know what you have until it’s gone. I’ll give you something to miss other than your once intact mental health and reasonable climate. Appreciate me, or learn to miss me, heathens.
If you enjoy the heat, oh my, am I going to bring it, especially now that I’m in the spotlight. Oh, you didn’t know? You didn’t know that the myth, the legend, Taylor Swift wrote a song for me called “Midnight Rain?” This proves one thing, my fellow subjects, I am the main character — written by a main character, herself. Don’t mind me, I’m just making my own name, chasing that fame or, rather, that infamy. It’s oh so lonely at the top.
Regardless, my dear subjects, I am here to stay and I’ve come prepared. Revenge is a dish best served cold . . . I hope you bundle up this winter.
xoxo,
Rain
