Fake News
Man loses 500 pounds through prayer.
February 7, 2012By Brad McLeod Tagline: Morbidly obese man beats weight through prayer, lack of religion. A local man recently lost an unprecedented amount of weight in a remarkably short amount of time, but he is attributing it to an unexpected source. Hal Gunderson, a formerly fat man from Delta, B.C. is claiming to have lost over 500 pounds thanks to prayer: not God, but the physical act of prayer. Gunderson claims he first discovered this form of exercise when he visited his local church in search of answers to his many ailments. “I was feeling real bad,” recalls Gunderson, “I was…
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SFU establishes new Faculty of Bears
February 6, 2012By Gary Lim Citing interest from the increasing bear population at SFU, the board of directors in association with the president’s office has decided to create the new Faculty of Bears. “It’s a no brainer really, as of 2012 members…
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TransLink to offer new daily U-Pass program
January 30, 2012Photo by Ben Derochie By Colin Sharp Humorist Emeritus Tag:“We’re getting really good at wasting money by changing the system,” says TransLink In response to continued complaints that the U-Pass program is still not vulnerable enough to fraud, TransLink…
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Campus Update: Jan 23rd
January 23, 2012<strong>By <a href="http://159.203.128.194/tag/Gary-Lim">Gary Lim</a></strong> Christian clubs consolidate into super club Spurred by a popular vote from their members, the nine individual clubs devoted to the appreciation and celebration of Christianity have decided to band into a single club. The reasons…
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First-year unaware entire university mocking him.
January 16, 2012By Gary Lim Tag:Freshman still totally in the dark on how universally loathed he is by university BURNABY (B.C.) — First-year student Jeremy Richardson is reportedly still unaware of the fact that he has been made a laughing stock by…
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Bar Room Anecdote takes Disturbing Twist
January 9, 2012By Gary Lim Senior Tavern Correspondent VANCOUVER (B.C.) – Onlookers watched in stunned silence as what began as a jovial bar room anecdote by one Steven Miller, 22, took off on a strange dark tangent last Thursday night. Long-time server…
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