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Horoscopes February 17–23
February 17, 2025Aries March 21–April 19 “It’s private, but no.” The stars think you should spend more time telling nosy people to mind their business, and then still answer their questions. Taurus April 20–May 20 “Um, Shabana. Would you like to speak, Shabana?” You are the centre of attention whenever you walk into a room, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be humble. Behind every great woman, there’s a Shabana. Don’t forget to shout out yours. Gemini May 21–June 20 “I’m launching a Bitcoin under Onijah Styles LLC.” The stars foresee big financial success for you. Once you lose all your money…
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The rumours are true, I have flirted with a man before
February 13, 2025I’m 25, and honestly, it’s great. Love being 25. Like yesterday, I wanted a chocolate bar, so I just bought myself a chocolate bar. Didn’t have to ask my mom, didn’t have to pass GO, didn’t have to collect $200…
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Peakie gets sexy
February 13, 2025Dear Peakie, Do you have the TLC people’s phone number (the network, not the girl group)? I was practicing the Megan Thee Stallion headboard challenge by myself so I’d be ready for Valentine’s Day, and what followed was actually the…
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Dear Peakie aids those in need
February 4, 2025Dear Peakie, I love merch! People think my favourite slogan is “fight, fight, fight,” but it’s actually “monetize, monetize, monetize.” I can sell anything! Candy, robes, guitars . . . I would sell the whole country for profit if I…
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Simulating poverty is not advocacy
January 23, 2025Have you ever been told not to judge someone until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes? The Making Ends Meet Poverty Simulation (MEM) that will be held at 312 Main St. on February 11 is seemingly designed to let…
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CONFESSIONALS: I wish my students were more creative
January 22, 2025I’m a TA. Some might even say I’m the best TA (and they would be so unequivocally correct). So naturally, academic integrity (only second to graphic design) is my passion. I spend all my free time looking for new ways…
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Horoscopes January 6–12
January 9, 2025Aries March 21–April 19 I was gossiping with the stars about you, and they said that you’re stubborn, so you’ll probably think you’re invincible all year. Close your damn incognito Google flights tab. The Boeings are falling apart! #StayGrounded Taurus…
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goSFU? More like noSFU
December 9, 2024OK, it’s course selection season! Time to log into the easy-peasy, foolproof system called goSFU. It allows us to enroll in classes, request our wonderful advising transcripts, and pay our ever-increasing tuition. But what happens when the world goes dark? …
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Paranoia that LinkedIn is watching
November 27, 2024Do you know the feeling right after you post something online? The doubt and fear that seeps in, and feels like darkness clutching your gut? The thought that something you had posted, whether you actually believe in it or were…
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It’s Dear Peakie again
November 26, 2024Dear Peakie, I’m in my main character era. I love it when people watch me walk into lecture one hour late with my oat vanilla latte. I walk through the front door so I can strut right in front of…
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Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.
For advertising inquiries: [email protected]
For promotional inquiries: [email protected]
Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.
For advertising inquiries: [email protected]
For promotional inquiries: [email protected]