Seven things to do in Vancouver this Halloween

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October 24, 2016

Whether you’re a spooky history buff, are looking to win a best costume contest, or just want to save the world from zombies, Vancouver has an attraction for you. Picked from all the festive activities running all month long, below are the top seven Halloween attractions in the city.

Richmond Country Farms
Boasting 37 years of experience, Richmond Country Farms has gotten Halloween celebrations down pat. With a huge pumpkin patch, wagon rides, a corn maze, free apples fresh from the tree, and much more, this is a must-visit attraction in the month of October.
Where: 12900 Steveston Hwy, Richmond
When: October 1–31

Admission: $9–12 (includes a pumpkin!)
All ages

Fright Nights at Playland
Advertised as “Western Canada’s Scariest Haunt,” Fright Nights is another popular Vancouverite scare destination. If you’re drop-dead scared of the dark, clowns, possessed dolls, or ghosts, best steer clear and stick to one of the 15 rides available. Try not to puke up your mini powdered donuts.
Where: Playland Entrance at East Hastings and Windermere Street, Vancouver
When: October 7–31
Admission: $22–$79 (depending on the pass you purchase and the day)
Not recommended for guests under 12 years old and over 65 years old

Zombie Syndrome interactive theatre
Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to save Downtown Vancouver from a rampant zombie plague. Find the clues, outrun the walking dead, and try to hunt down suspected vampire psychopath Mattias Van Cleave. Bring your running shoes, your smartphone, and your vigilance — you never know what’s lurking behind that corner.
Where: Downtown Vancouver/Granville Island (exact location revealed the day before your mission begins)
When: October 4–31
Admission: $12.50–50 (depending on the day)
For ages 15+

Potter’s House of Horrors
If you love movies about abandoned prisons, bloodthirsty inhuman creatures, extraterrestrials, and hillbilly psychopaths, this is the haunted house for you. With two houses, Monstrosity and the Swampin’ Slaughterhouse, horror movie fans and thrill-seekers should buy their tickets fast and kiss their loved ones goodbye. For those with little ones, there’s even a Li’l Haunters haunted house for kids aged 12 and under.
Where: 12530 72 Avenue, Surrey
When: October 1–2, 7–9, and 11– 31
Admission: Adults $14–$50 and kids $10–$40
For all ages

Halloween International Students Party
Are you a university student? Do you want to see some of the hottest student DJs from around the world play? Do you want to win up to $1,000 in cash prizes for having an amazing costume? Do you want to tour Vancouver in a limo and then attend one of the best Halloween parties Vancouver has to offer? If you answered yes to any of these, this party is for you! With various packages and price points, you’re sure to find something that matches your budget and tastes.
Where: AllStar Wings & Ribs, 808 Bute Street, Vancouver
When: October 29, starting at 9 p.m.
Admission: Varies depending how many tickets are left
Ages 19+ only

Haunted Halloween Trolley Tour
This one’s for the spooky history buffs. In the dark shadows of October nights, the trolley will take you to some of the most haunted Vancouver destinations, including the city morgue, the Fairmont Hotel, Mountain View cemetery, the Vancouver Police Museum, and Stanley Park. Prepare to hear the gruesome tales of Errol Flynn, the Lady in Red, the Castellani Milkshake Murder, and many more. Call to make your reservation in advance, since the tour always sells out!
Where: Departure and arrival at Canada Place
When: October 14–31 (excluding Mondays and Sundays)
Admission: $40 for a two and a half-hour tour
Ages 13+ only

Ghost Train in Stanley Park

If you’re a bit of a wimp, and looking for something on the fun side, this train ride through Stanley Park is a great way to spend an evening. Complete with a mariachi band, this year’s Day of the Dead theme will have you smiling and maybe a little spooked.

When: October 8–31, 11 a.m.–5 p.m.

Where: Stanley Park
Admission: $7–11
All ages

Haunted campus: A look at legends in and around SFU

By

EIC

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October 24, 2016

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The frat house

One of the most haunted locations in Burnaby has an SFU connection. Fairacres — or as it’s better known now, the Burnaby Art Gallery — was built in the early 1900s and has changed owners several times over its long history, including being the home of SFU’s first (and very short-lived) fraternity. According to interviews conducted by The Peak’s own Bess Lovejoy back in 1998, staff at the gallery have had their fair share of ghostly encounters. One of the employees claimed to hear voices on the other side of her office door, despite nobody being there when she went to investigate. Other tales include the gift shop being found in shambles after a night when the gallery should have been empty, footsteps and sounds of moving furniture coming from the unoccupied third floor, and lights on telephones lighting up with no connection.

There has even been a sighting of a monk praying — a spirit left over from the building’s time as a monastery. The most common stories are of the house’s first mistress, who wanders up and around the main stairs. Another ghost also haunts the staircase, which may explain the feelings of unease Lovejoy experienced in this area. Countless others have shared accounts of strange goings-on, ranging from small sounds of rustling fabric to intense instances of inexplicable terror. Could you make it through a night?

An AQ office

There is a well-known rumour at SFU that a professor was found dead at their desk and now haunts the campus. This tale has more truth to it than you might think. Psychology professor Barry Beyerstein was found in his office. Cause of death: a heart attack. Beyerstein was the co-founder of a skeptic society in BC. Yet, he remained open-minded about the unexplained, only ruling out what the facts proved to be absolutely impossible. While it is unclear what Beyerstein believed happened in the afterlife, wouldn’t it be fitting for someone who tried to disprove the paranormal for most of their life to now forever haunt the halls?

The art gallery

There’s a legend floating around SFU that the art gallery in the AQ is haunted. The story goes a little something like this: a long time ago, a house stood right where the art gallery is now. The house was owned by an American outlaw who was rumoured to be a cult leader. In this house, the man tortured children. That far up the mountain, no one would have been able to hear the screams of the young victims. Who’s to say one didn’t die during the process? Whatever the truth is, the memory of these terrible events reveals itself late at night when the halls are seemingly empty.

People who have stayed late enough at SFU have reportedly heard the screams of young children. Some have even seen the image of a young boy. What everyone seems to agree on is that all the strange goings-on appear to take place around 2:30 a.m. A note of warning to anyone hoping to hear the ghost for themselves: if you hear it cry for help, it may just follow you home.

The old burned-out Bugs

By the time you’ve been at SFU for a few years, you’ve probably heard of the old Volkswagen Bugs that are hidden in the woods. Hell, maybe you’ve even seen them for yourself.

There are two Bugs slowly being claimed by the forest. It seems that many years ago, the drivers lost control of their cars and they went plummeting over the edge. While the Bugs themselves aren’t inherently creepy by the light of day, after sundown it’s a different story. After all, who knows what happened to the people in the cars?

The abandoned playground

It’s a long-standing trend in horror movies to include images of childhood in chilling and creepy forms. With its monochromatic greyscale and semi-permanent fog, it’s not hard to picture SFU as the setting of just such a film — especially if one stumbled upon the abandoned playground. Half-consumed by the forest, the only structure still visible is the old swing set. With the fog rolling in, the wind gently blowing the swings, even students with nerves of steel may find themselves shaken. Don’t believe me? Go see for yourself.

The treehouse

If there is one thing that can strike fear into students’ hearts (other than finals), it’s the Vancouver housing crisis. This isn’t the first time those attending SFU have had trouble finding places to live. During the 1970s, there was a popular trend of building treehouses in the forest around campus. Even after that, there were still students who chose to live rent-free in the woods. Most of these structures were destroyed by parking lot expansions, but at least one still remains. Hopefully, if you ever stumble upon it you don’t disturb someone — or something — inside.

The morgue

Something that very few people outside of the criminology department will know is that Burnaby campus has its own working morgue. It is off-limits to everyone except the RCMP and research assistants that run it. Every day, as you walk through the halls, somewhere nearby there is a room full of dead bodies whose souls can be tortured by their untimely ends. If you’ve ever felt like you’re not alone when studying late at night, this might be the answer.

Ten horror movies you’ve never heard of

By

EIC

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October 24, 2016

7

the-voices — The Voices features Ryan Reynolds as Jerry.

By: Vincent Justin Mitra, Peak Associate

Pontypool

This Canadian zombie film follows Grant Mazzy, a former big city radio shock jock who is reassigned to a station in the small unincorporated village of Pontypool, Ontario. With a blizzard raging outside, Grant and his co-workers decide to stay on the air to help inform their listeners as the town seemingly descends into madness. The film features excellent writing and performances, and a unique twist on how zombies work, which I will not spoil here. Seriously, the best way to experience this film is to go into it with as little knowledge as possible.

Cooties

This horror-comedy has a good number of famous people in the cast, including Elijah Wood and Rainn Wilson, both of whom play elementary school teachers. This is because the film takes place inside an elementary school and all the zombies are, yes, elementary school students. If you’ve ever wanted to see Frodo Baggins and Dwight from The Office fight a bunch of zombified eight-year-olds, this is the movie for you.

The Final Girls

A tribute to slasher films of the ’80s, this film follows a group of friends who get sucked into Camp Bloodbath, a slasher film from the ’80s, and must use their knowledge of horror movie clichés to survive. There are amazing performances by everyone involved, and while there is a cheesy line here or there, the movie definitely makes them work. Not to be confused with Final Girl, a thriller also released in the same year.

Housebound

This New Zealand horror-comedy follows Kylie after she is placed under house arrest (ankle monitor and all) and forced to live with her mother who, as Kylie finds out, believes their house to be haunted. A good mix of scary and funny, and the idea of Kylie being legally prevented from leaving the house is a neat take.

Ernest Scared Stupid

Local handyman and idiot Ernest P. Worrell must save Halloween and his hometown after he unintentionally releases an ancient troll who steals the souls of children. Part of the direct-to-video series, including films like Ernest Goes to Camp and Ernest Saves Christmas, this goofball film is an excellent time capsule of what horror films for kids were like in the early ’90s. The film also, weirdly, has one or two legitimately scary parts.

Circle

Fifty strangers wake up in a dark featureless room, standing on glowing circles and unable to move. A device in the centre of the room kills one of them every few minutes, and once they realize they can control which of them dies, they begin to turn on each other. Essentially a combination of the film 12 Angry Men and the party game known as Mafia or Werewolf, this incredibly intense film discusses topics such as racial prejudice, sexism, and morality with an intentionally diverse cast.

Wasting Away, or Aaah! Zombies!! (It’s been released under both titles)

A group of friends unknowingly eats a batch of tainted ice cream that turns them into shambling zombies. However, they do not know they are zombies. This horror-comedy is a zombie movie from the rarely considered zombie perspective. A light and funny film with some clever ideas on why zombies do what they do.

Sleep Tight, or Mientras duermes

This Spanish horror-thriller follows Cesar, the concierge of an apartment building, as he secretly works to crush the joy in the lives of each of his tenants in increasingly invasive ways. The film manages to make you root for him just a little bit at times — until you remember that he is a terrible, terrible person.

The Voices

A dark horror-comedy starring a post-Green Lantern, pre-Deadpool Ryan Reynolds as Jerry, a mentally unwell man who talks to his cat and dog, and takes their advice when they answer him. The comedy scenes and the horror scenes are made all the more intense by how quickly the film switches back and forth between the two, making this one of the darkest films to involve talking pets.

Marble Hornets

While not technically a feature film, this YouTube web series follows Jay as he sifts through strange film footage shot by his missing friend Alex, after the latter suddenly stopped production on their college film and disappeared. Marble Hornets heavily contributed to the rise in popularity of the Slenderman urban legend and was the first, if not only, well-made production on the subject, quickly receiving praise from award-winning critic Roger Ebert.

This web series is super creepy, and perfect to binge on a dark and rainy night. There is a playlist available on YouTube which contains all the entries. A feature film based on the web series was later made in 2015, and it was terrible.

ALBUM REVIEWS

By

EIC

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October 24, 2016

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Boards of Canada – Geogaddi

The Scottish duo’s 2002 album keeps much of the nostalgic sentiment that made their first album a cult classic, but turns those childhood feelings in a darker direction.

The duo’s fascination with the occult, coupled with unsettling instrumentals, creates an otherworldly version of childhood. Take “1969,” where a downtempo beat is paired with a digitally manipulated vocal sample. It focuses on David Koresh of the Branch Davidians, who were besieged by the FBI in 1993 and ended with 79 dead, including Koresh. This coupling creates feelings of anxiety that run through much of the album.

Overall, this album is just plain creepy. There is the runtime too, which is 66:06 — perhaps a joke or a sign? Also, the web series Salad Fingers took its theme from this album.

Aphex Twin – Selected Ambient Works Vol. II

While anything with “ambient” in its title may not cause immediate scares, this is an album that becomes more unnerving the more you listen.

The 1994 sequel to the classic Selected Ambient Works 85–92 consists mostly of rhythmless soundscapes, but not for relaxing while falling asleep. Instead, it evokes feelings of being lost in the woods, or stuck in an abandoned power station. Nevertheless, this isn’t just a soundtrack to a nightmare, as some tracks are beautiful. The third track is a nice break from the claustrophobia in much of the album.

Most songs are untitled, which causes the album to blend together after long periods of listening. With a runtime of over two and a half hours, this album is a slow burner, but will catch you off guard with its eerie soundscapes.

Current 93 – Dogs Blood Rising

This experimental group is known for its wide variety of releases, ranging from occult-influenced industrial to folk songs that sound straight from the medieval era.

Dogs Blood Rising, from 1984, is from the band’s industrial iteration. Aside from that, this album cannot be simply explained, and borders on disturbing. No one track is stranger than the others, as all focus on some aspect of the occult and the devil. The instrumentals are filled with sections of white noise, feedback, and droning. The vocals are truly otherworldly, as the wailing and moaning sound like a possessed soul.

This album is truly a soundtrack for hell.

Farrah Abraham – My Teenage Dream Ended

Some horror movies are great because of how awful they are. Take Birdemic, a 21st century ripoff of Hitchcock’s The Birds, and one of the best-worst movies ever. Farrah Abraham’s 2012 release My Teenage Dream Ended does not fit into the category of “so-bad-it’s-good” — it’s horrifyingly bad. See what I did there?

Anyways, this is the worst album I have ever heard. At 27 minutes, it’s excruciating; even seconds in it’s unbearable. Most tracks consist of generic dance instrumentals with the reality star’s autotuned vocals. Also, her lyrics are delivered in a rushed manner, as if she wrote too much for the album. These confessional lyrics detail raising a kid on the show Teen Mom, and then deciding to film a “sex tape” that was “accidentally leaked.”

If this piques your interest, there’s a book companion for the album. When it comes to Farrah Abraham, though, I’ll stay far away from either.

Join the Virtual Stage’s Zombie Syndrome: Dead in the Water

By

EIC

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October 24, 2016

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deadwater_web — Sarah Omran and Rowan Jang take to the undead waters in Zombie Syndrome: Dead in the Water running now until Halloween.

The Zombie Syndrome, first and foremost, is an interactive theatre experience whose goal is to freak out its audience. In the words of creator and artistic director Andy Thompson, “It’s a horror show. It’s a Halloween show. That’s what people are paying to see.” Thompson spoke with The Peak to share how his show has grown from its 2012 inception, and how it’s making waves.

Every year since 2012, Zombie Syndrome has returned to the streets of Vancouver with a new story, new characters, and even more zombies. This year, Thompson takes the audience to the streets and water of Granville Island. New to this year’s iteration of the show is the incorporation of zombie-vampire hybrids, as well as Apple’s iBeacon technology. This show is the first in Canada to incorporate the iBeacon into its performances.

Keeping fangs in the actors’ mouths proved challenging — though by no means was it the hardest hurdle to conquer. One of the trickier things the actors had to do was learn to deal with the iBeacon.

The show is comprised of approximately seven sites, which function as mini-sets for the crew. According to Thompson, challenges with the new technology weren’t limited to simply learning how to use it. He also had to reconcile it with the story and integrate it naturally so that it became a storytelling technique. So, as part of the show, he gave the technology to the Canadian government and recruited special agents — the audience — to save the world from certain disaster.

“At every site there is at least one beacon integration moment. And so there is a whole bunch of logistically challenging stuff around just that. For example, the range of the beacons, I had to teach my actors how to, at the perfect point in the story, when this has to happen, you have this secret thing in your pocket. You flick it on and then not only that, but you also have to turn it off because if it’s left on by accident and you start your scene with it on, you know, you might be killing Hamlet before ‘To be or not to be . . .’ It’s out of order.”

It’s been a dream of Thompson’s to get the audiences out onto a boat during the adventures he’s created, and finally this year the stars aligned. “There were a lot of challenges around feasibility, timing, budget, boat captain, boat engagement, scheduling, all sorts of things — and that’s just the aquatic portion.”

The show itself almost feels like a House of the Dead live-action video game. You interact and chat with characters who have scripts and storylines, you try to neutralize (no killing!) the zombies/vampires/zombie-vampires after you, and ultimately, you’re the deciding factor as to whether you survive and win the show, or you die and fail.

There’s even a scoreboard, ranking audiences on how well they’ve completed the show. The actors don’t break character, and right from the beginning it feels more real than you anticipated.

Word of warning: there is a bit of running. Supposedly it’s optional, but when there are zombies chasing you and everyone else on your team is fleeing the scene, you end up doing the extra cardio.

Also, make sure you download the app required to interact with the beacons. Two sorry suckers didn’t have data on the trip, and while we read aloud the extra information conveyed via the iBeacon technology, they did miss out on part of the experience.

The show runs from now until Halloween, Tuesday through Sunday, so get your tickets and do your best to save the world, agents. Visit Virtual Stage online, or simply check out Zombie Syndrome online for tickets and more information.

Satellite Signals

By

EIC

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October 24, 2016

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WOODWARD’S

On October 25 at 7 p.m., the Djavad Mowafahian World Art Centre will host Speaking of Dance, a discussion on female choreographers and the unique hurdles they have faced in the industry. The event features local choreographers, moderated by Deborah Meyers, a dance writer for The Vancouver Sun. Admission is free, and no prior registration required.

https://www.sfu.ca/sfuwoodwards/events/events1/2016-2017-fall/SpeakingofDance_Oct2016.html

SFU SURREY

SFU’s part-time Occupational Health and Safety (OHS) Diploma is a program that explores the intricacies of workplace safety management. The SFU Surrey campus is hosting a free info session on November 1 at 5:30 p.m. This is an opportunity both for students interested in OHS, and professionals looking to enhance their education. The program is now open for online registration.

https://www.sfu.ca/continuing-studies/programs/diploma-in-occupational-health-and-safety/why-this-program.html

HARBOUR CENTRE

Herb Auerbach and Ira Nadel will hold a book launch for their work Placemakers, which looks at the real estate industry through the unique perspective of world history. This free launch will take place on November 7 at Harbour Centre. Sales and a book signing will happen after the event. Reservations are required.

http://www.sfu.ca/continuing-studies/events/2016/11/Book-Launch-Placemakers-Emperors-Kings-Entrepeneurs-A-Brief-History-Real-Estate-Development.html

New Music Friday

By

Peak Web

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October 21, 2016

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By: Tegan Gallilee-Lang, Max James Hill, and Courtney Miller

Follow The Peak on Spotify to stay up to date on New Music Friday.

“Brightside” – Icona Pop

Courtney Miller: This is like ridiculously happy and optimistic and my dark, dark soul automatically pulls away from such sunshine. However, I do enjoy the lyrics and the drive behind trying to cheer someone up. It’s also got a nice solid bass drumbeat and good vocals — the more I listen to this, the more I like it.

Tegan Galliee-Lang: My guess is this is a top 40 hit in the making. It passes the “can I see myself dancing to this in the car” test.

Max James Hill: It’s no “I Love It,” but it’s pretty enjoyable I guess? For me, Icona Pop is better in theory than execution — they’re trying to do the whole the Knife-meets-Robyn thing here and it only works about 60 percent of the time. Not the most memorable tune.

“Say It (Clean Bandit Remix)” – Flume feat. Tove Lo

CM: So it’s going to be an electro-pop playlist this week. That’s fine. This song feels like it should be dancier than it actually is. The vocals are alright, albeit repetitive in the chorus without reinforcing anything. I find this pretty monotonous and boring. Not bad for studying though.

TGL: I don’t know, Tove Lo kinda lost her appeal for me when I watched her perform on Saturday Night Live with Nick Jonas. She tanked, because she couldn’t hit any of the high notes or do any of the riffs.

MJH: Picking this song out from the hundreds of others that sound just like it is like finding a needle in a haystack: it’s pretty much impossible and you’ll probably get poked in the process.

“Hallelujah” – Pentatonix

CM: Nooooo, it’s too damn early for Christmas music. December 23 to December 26 is the only tolerable time frame for this. My prejudice against Christmas music aside, I love Pentatonix and this was amazing. I love how much vocal talent a capella showcases, how well the voices go together — like that damn bass voice is phenomenal. It sounds entirely different from Leonard Cohen.

TGL: I don’t know if this counts as a Christmas song, Pentatonix. Hallelujah to me is at its most powerful arranged simply. There’s too much glitz and glamour in this arrangement. It’s supposed to be a whisper of a song, not a belt.

MJH: This arrangement is so sickly saccharine that I’m pretty sure my blood sugar just doubled. As a former vocal jazz singer, I’m kind of over the whole a capella thing, and playing this song off as a sunny Christmas ditty totally ignores how beautiful and aching it can be when done by someone with actual talent like Jeff Buckley or Rufus Wainwright. You know what had me saying “Hallelujah”? When the song ended.

“A-YO” – Lady Gaga

CM: Gaga sounds almost a little country in this song? I don’t know, but I’m loving it. The combination of great music, super solid vocals, and classy fuck-you lyrics.

TGL: I will never understand Lady Gaga or what goes on inside her head. I accept this. But I don’t understand why she insists on being the queen of reinvention. There is no way this genre/sound is better than her old stuff.

MJH: OK, so I’ve heard a lot of people are hating on these new Lady Gaga songs — is it weird that this song is my favourite of hers in a while? It’s actually a new look for her, and I get a kind of Kacey Musgraves vibe from this one, which ends up being a good fit.

“On the Level” – Leonard Cohen

CM: This started and I was like, “This sounds like a Leonard Cohen track just from this piano” — I’m disappointed I was right. It’s Leonard Cohen. I don’t know what else I can say. It’s a bit more uplifting than the other Cohen track we heard a couple weeks ago (“You Want It Darker”), and I mean, Cohen’s a classic, but it’s really just depressing and not in a fun way. Plus I’m kinda over the whole angel/devil device.

TGL: This is probably my favourite song on the playlist. Simple and effective. Also I’m a real sucker for low, grunty man-singing (à la July Talk).

MJH: Leonard “I intend to live forever” Cohen sounds half-dead here, but it sort of works. Reminds me of Nick Cave or early Tom Waits. The background vocals are not unlike “So Long, Marianne” from his debut, and the bluesy instrumental is a good complement to the lyrics. Not bad.

“Happy When You Go” – Banfi

CM: I like the plucky guitar, but I’m not so keen on the strained vocals, although they do improve as the song unfolds. “These people don’t fuck around” is deceptively catchy, though. I dunno. I guess it’s worth a couple listens maybe, if you’re into more of an indie sound, but I won’t be adding this to my iTunes anytime soon.

TGL: If somebody asked me to do an exaggerated impression of a typical indie singer, it would sound exactly like how this guy sings. Breathy, scoopy, consonant-free singing.

MJH: I wasn’t able to find a single picture of Banfi online, but I’m going to take a wild guess and say the dude has a huge unkempt beard. This song is enjoyable but so, so done before.

“Love to Hate It” – Off Bloom

CM: In the verse it sounds like a fairly generic pop song with a hint of R&B, but I like how in the chorus they experiment more with the backtrack. It’s still not a fave, and I don’t think the chorus or the bridge (that follows the chorus in sound more than the verse) can save it. The higher vocals over the more staccato instrumental like three-quarters through sounds like it could’ve been something really good. Alas.

TGL: The best part of this song is that instrument they sampled. Chinese instrument maybe? I can’t put my finger on what it is but it sounds like it’s in agony and I love it.

MJH: I’ve been waiting for someone to give the Chinese erhu the EDM treatment. Seriously, though, I don’t want to sound like a broken record here, but all these songs sound a) exactly like one another, and b) exactly like everything on the radio. Am I becoming an old man?

“You On Repeat” – Jeremy Folderol feat. Heyday

CM: This track feels super formulaic like I could stick a random other dance-pop or whatever genre this song is onto this backtrack and no one would be able to tell the difference (or care, probably). Given the title, I am pleasantly surprised that the lyrics didn’t repeat as often as I feared. I mean, it was still a lot, but it was a bearable amount.

TGL: Yeah OK, whatever, it’s fine. Would not play on repeat but it’s fine.

MJH: I literally did not even notice this song was playing while I was doing my work. It commands no attention at all.

“Hate to See You Go” – The Rolling Stones

CM: Oh harmonica, how I love thee. This is more blues-y/country than I expected but aside from the harmonica, it doesn’t really bring anything original to the table. The boring guitar riff will haunt me in my dreams, I’m sure. Like it’s so boringly repetitive, this riff, that it’s actually starting to annoy me and I love guitars. I’m unimpressed — I expected more.

TGL: Not my favourite Rolling Stones sound, but hey, you can’t always get what you want.

MJH: The Rolling Stones haven’t made a good record since 1981, and this isn’t changing that. I get that it’s supposed to be a “back to basics” blues tribute, but it doesn’t really do much more than that, and if I want this kind of vibe I’ll just listen to Howlin’ Wolf or something — not these sloppy seconds.

“I Feel So Bad” – Kungs feat. Ephemerals

CM: I like how well the vocals fit with the music with the simple guitar and good rhythm. The melody works well with this one. The incorporation of horns is also a good call to make the song more dynamic and enjoyable.

TGL: The trumpets made this song 100% cooler. Club beat + trumpets = success.

MJH: I’m a fan of trumpet (trombone?) in pop songs, and I like the raspy vocals from Ephemerals, but otherwise this is nothing special.

“Take My Breath Away” – Alesso

CM: I like that new elements get added to the track as the song progresses, but in the middle the track and the repeated “Take my breath away” feel a little stale. I feel like I’ve heard this song 100 times before. The vocals are good, a little sultry in places, but I don’t get anything special out of this.

TGL: This would be the song playing when the credits rolled after a dystopian teen movie set in space. It fits because there’s no air in space, so your breath would definitely be taken away.

MJH: There’s only one Rihanna, Alesso, and it’s not you.

“Kill Me One More Time” – Zagata

CM: OK it took like three tries to focus on this song because I kept dozing off in the middle of it. It’s a really soothing kind of sound so if you need a lullaby because the stress of midterms is getting to you, put this on and you’ll sleep through your worries. It’s unassuming and surprisingly soft. For anything else, I can’t really see the appeal.

TGL: Ooooh the beat is so tuggy. I dig it. Yup. I dig it.

MJH: This playlist is maybe the worst one yet. I guess (?) this song is alright, but I can’t really imagine myself every listening to it or ever recommending it to anyone or even dancing to it at a party. It’s like holding your hand under lukewarm water for four minutes.

The voice in the box

By

EIC

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October 21, 2016

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[dropcap]M[/dropcap]ost people know not to mess around with Ouija boards, but no one ever said anything about a ghost box.

While we are all rational students of academia and most likely to err on the side of reason and science, I cannot express to you how real this was for me at the time. It is a story that tests the limits of my understanding of reality and still remains in a shroud of mystery that is hard to explain.

I had just begun a job working as a bartender for a nightclub, which I will leave unnamed.

My second shift I was ordered to weigh the bottles before the shift, in order to track liquor consumption. One bottle in particular had inexplicably flown off the scale as I went to grab more to toss on. I flinched from the sound, already a bit on edge from the unfamiliar large, silent, and dark room I seemed to be inhabiting, solitary.

I was perplexed about how this bottle managed to fall to the ground. But I was more worried about missing liquor before the shift even started, which would look bad on my behalf.

Explaining the loss to Michael, my manager, was easier than I thought. He gave me a knowing look and quickly brushed it off. So did I — relieved.

Months later, close to Halloween: Janelle, a server I had come to grow fond of, brought in a device called a ‘ghost box’ in the spirit of the season.

A ghost box is a device that allows voices of spirits to manipulate a radio channel sweep, thus providing a means of direct contact. Think of it as a new and improved Ouija board, except with voices in real time.

Rumours spread amongst staff about a suicide a number of years ago, where a girl hung herself in the basement bathroom after a shift. Creeping down the stairs, Janelle and I went to see if there was any validity to the story and to test out this ghost box she bought off the internet.

The bathroom hadn’t been renovated and it was still sporting ‘70s decor, with dark mahogany panels and brown patterned wallpaper in pristine condition. “I wonder if the basement is left unused because of the suicide?” Janelle asked, instantly making me feel uneasy.

This observation bolstered an unusual energy within me, which urged me to quickly leave the bathroom. We settled for playing with the ghost box in the stock room, which felt safer under its sobering fluorescent lighting.

For the first 10 minutes, there was just static.

“Is anyone there?” We took turns asking it, but the channels just kept flipping through.

I decided to get bold: “Why did you kill yourself?”

Like a metronome, the box continued to flick through channels with nothing out of the ordinary occurring. “This thing doesn’t work Janelle. You got duped!”

“Hi.” If someone would have told me it was just a regular person on the end of the line, I would have believed them.

Our slivered eyes turned to full moons with shock. It actually worked. Or was it a fluke? Or a simple explanation of pareidolia of the ears? “Ask it a question!” I practically demanded Janelle.

“What is your name?” she asked, hovering over the box in anticipation.

For a few moments it continued to flip through.

“George.” We couldn’t believe the responses we were getting.

“How did you die?” I blurted out. I’ve never been one for small talk.

The gap of silence in between lasted forever. I was beginning to question the logic of this phenomenon.

“Lead.” It paused. “Poison.” It was nearly impossible to make out, however the thought that it could be real spurred me on and these puzzling words made it more provoking.

“Did he say lead poisoning?” I asked quizzically.

“Food.” George blurted out.

“In food, he said; he was poisoned in his food!” I repeated as I was starting to get swept up in the excitement.

“Red” the voice came from the machine again. It was coming at a much more rapid pace than before. “Blanket. Down.”

These words were all highly subjective, but the way the voice came through didn’t seem like natural stops on the radio scan. The voice remained the same pitch and tone the entire time and it carried through on various channel switches.

Was the ghost describing the contents of my own room to me?

“In the mirror.” His voice became difficult to make out after that. We had to listen very closely to understand it. “Mask.” It continued to muffle.

It became clear again and uttered, “Michael”, our manager’s name. Things were getting personal. Or were they? Michael is a pretty common name.

Then we heard three distinct knocks on the door. Feeling relatively creeped out, we were paralyzed, frozen in place.

“Oh fuck, it’s probably just Micheal.” Janelle quickly turned the box off and hid it in her purse. We snapped into work mode, picking up various bottles to take up to the bar, which was our regular routine at the end of the day.

“We better hurry up and get these up there, I’m sure he wants to lock up soon,” Janelle reasoned. “And maybe tell him the spirit knows his name.” We nervously giggled together as we packed up, suddenly ultra aware of our surroundings.

After completing our last task, we went to the manager’s office. Michael was still in the midst of completing the nightly cash out. “You’re not itching to get out of here right away?” I asked, mildly confused.

“No, I still have a bit left here to do. You guys can leave if you like.” Michael motioned for us to go ahead.

“So, you didn’t knock to tell us to hurry up?” I asked incredulously.

Michael gave us a strange look, as though he didn’t know what we were talking about. “No”, he spoke slowly. Janelle went silent, her body language indicating she was eager to get out of the building. I laughed, “Sure, sure.” He had to be fucking with us.

We exited the office, but I ducked my head back in. I needed to get some leverage on him so he would admit he did it —that he knew what we had been up to the whole time and that he just had to mess with us.

“You know,” I paused, then spoke very clearly, “it said your name.”

When I finally got home that night, it was close to 4 a.m. Normally, I would jump into bed without much delay, but still feeling a little creeped out, I turned on my lights to my bedroom and tried to get a feeling of normalcy back.

My red duvet cover became glaringly obvious. The mirror on the other side of the wall became menacing. The Venetian mask my parents brought home for me from Italy suddenly stood out. Had George described the contents of my room?

I suddenly laughed at how stupid I was being. I turned off the lights, got into bed, and opened my laptop for some Netflix action, to hopefully get my mind off things, and fall asleep.

I was nearly dozed off, plunging into the subconscious of dreams, when I heard a knock on my door. I completely snapped upright, any remnants of sleep gone. Did it really happen? Or was it in the beginning of a dream? Maybe my computer was too loud for my roommate. “Yeah?” I called out. No answer.

Suddenly, I burst out of bed and aggressively opened my door. Nothing but a pitch-black hallway was in front of me. My heart was pounding. I was terrified. I felt my stomach sink. It felt like I had touched my fingers into an unseen dimension, and now the inhabitants of that dimension knew me and would always know me. I made a mistake using that ghost box.

That night, I ended up watching the happiest TV shows I could possibly find with all the lights on, rigidly sitting on my living room couch — one eye and one ear always focused on the hall behind me. I had to wait for the sun to come up to feel safe enough to sleep.

Sometimes there’s one coincidence too many, and it can leave you feeling like you have made a grave mistake playing with the afterlife. Feeling unsettled and unsafe in your own home is a very real feeling. While many don’t believe in ghosts, they also have not been scientifically refuted, and that’s enough to keep me wondering.

So, my advice to you — whether you believe in the ghosts or not — is to stay away from Ouija boards and ghosts box, and keep your communication to the living, not the restless spirits that are long dead.

SFU wins 1–0 against Concordia

By

EIC

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October 21, 2016

0

womens_soccer_web — The wins puts SFU in a playoff position.

To say that this was the biggest game of the season for the Clan would not be an overstatement. Coming into the match, SFU was fifth in the Great Northwest Athletic Conference (GNAC) with 12 points; Concordia was in fourth with 15, with the top four teams qualifying for the GNAC Championship. Needless to say, a win for SFU was an absolute must.

“I thought it was really good for the team to come out under pressure with so much at stake,” said head coach Annie Hamel after the game. “The emotions were really high, so the focus today was trying to contain all of that and find a way to perform when you want to do it so badly for the seniors. We’re fighting for a playoff spot against this team, so there was a lot on the line.”

“I’m so proud of my team right now,” said Katelyn Erhardsen, a sophomore from Maple Ridge. “[It] was a very special game for us today. We wanted to win for our seniors so bad and give them a chance. We have the mindset right now that is not their last home game, and we want to make the GNAC.”

The first half was a back-and-forth affair, with Concordia having the better chance. However, it was in the second half that SFU showed the determination that should be expected of a team battling for a playoff position. In the 85th minute, the goal finally came.

“I got the ball out wide and did a give and go with my roommate, Christina Dickson,” said Erhardsen, who assisted on the winning goal. “And then I saw an open gap and played Emma Pringle behind, so a one-touch finish.”

And who else to score SFU’s biggest goal of the season than SFU’s biggest performer of the season, Emma Pringle. Her eighth goal of the year not only leads the team, but leads the GNAC as well.

And she’s only a freshman.

“It’s been difficult for her in the last two games, she had not gotten on the scoresheet and I know she puts a lot of pressure on herself,” said Hamel. “But the team realizes it’s increasingly difficult for her to find the back of the net and find openings, because they are doubling up on her all of the time. Everybody knows about her, it’s not like you have a secret weapon. But she continues to find ways and she continues to work hard.

“I say it all the time, the future looks so bright for her and for the program.”

The win puts SFU in a tie for fourth place with Concordia with 15 points, and the Clan is in the driver’s seat. SFU now holds the tiebreaker in a head-to-head record, and because this is the only time they play this season, it will stay that way. They aIso have an easier record, as they have three games left, all against teams lower than them in the standings.

Concordia has only two games left, and plays two teams currently higher than them. If the GNAC Championship started today, they would be in, and playing at home at Terry Fox Field.

Essentially, if they win all of their remaining games, they’re in.

However, they play the games for a reason. And if SFU plans to be in the championship picture, they are going to have to find the one thing that has eluded them so far: consistency. Although SFU has not lost more than twice in a row all year, they haven’t had a winning streak more than two games either.

“We just got to win out now and solidify that place in the playoff,” said Hamel. “That’s what the kids are thinking about every single day.”

NFL Blitz with Jason Romisher

By

EIC

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October 20, 2016

0

15044333568_702c02fc8e_b — Carson Palmer (#3) and the Cardinals are back on track after a tough start.

Upset special

Chicago (1–5) at Green Bay (3–2), Thursday 5:25 p.m.

The Packers are coming off a frustrating home loss to the Cowboys where they were utterly dominated. They enter this game with their top three cornerbacks and both their running backs injured. In desperation they traded for the Chiefs’ fourth string running back. The Bears meanwhile have received steady quarterback play from Brian Hoyer, who has thrown for over 300 yards in four straight games without an interception. I know this is sacrilege, but right now Hoyer is playing far better football than Aaron Rodgers. The Bears will light up the Packers secondary and Rodgers will throw a late game interception in this week’s upset special.

Prediction: Bears 24 Packers 17

New York Giants (3–3) vs. Los Angeles (3–3), Sunday 6:30 a.m. in London England

This matchup seems much the same for the Giants as their last game against the Ravens. The Giants are loaded on offence and should do just enough against a stout Rams defence to win. Case Keenum had the best game of his career last week for the Rams but will come back to the land of mediocrity in this performance.

Prediction: Giants 23 Rams 15

New Orleans (2–3) at Kansas City (3–2), Sunday 10 a.m.

I like the Chiefs’ ability to run the ball in this one against a suspect Saints defence. New Orleans is traditionally much better at home on offence and will be facing a Chiefs defence with excellent pass rushers and playmakers in the secondary. Look for Kansas City running back Jamaal Charles to become more involved in the offence and make some big plays.

Prediction: Chiefs 31 Saints 24

Buffalo (4–2) at Miami (2–4), Sunday 10 a.m.

Both team are coming off impressive victories which were achieved by running the football and playing stout defence. Look for both Bills running back LeSean McCoy and Dolphins counterpart Jay Ajayi to have big games. I’ve got to go with the Bills in this one.

Prediction: Bills 31 Dolphins 28

Baltimore (3–3) at New York Jets (1–5), Sunday 10 a.m.

In a unique scheduling twist, the Ravens are playing back-to-back road games in the same stadium. The Jets have turned to Geno Smith at quarterback for his first start since 2014. Smith was slated to be the Jets starter in 2015 before having his jaw broken by a teammate in a locker room altercation. Ryan Fitzpatrick seized the opportunity and played very well last year but has looked awful so far this year. I like Smith’s mobility and will look for a big game from Jets superstar receiver Brandon Marshall who will be facing a depleted Ravens secondary.

Prediction: Jets 25 Ravens 21

Oakland (4–2) at Jacksonville (2–3), Sunday 10 a.m.

As predicted, the Raiders lost last week to the Chiefs and coach Andy Reid, after the Chiefs’ bye week. The Jaguars eked out an ugly win in Chicago last week and are looking to keep the momentum going. Raiders quarterback Derek Carr wins the battle of 2014 draft picks against the Jaguars Blake Bortles and stakes the Raiders towards a perfect 5–0 record on the road this season.

Prediction: Raiders 38 Jaguars 31

Minnesota (5–0) at Philadelphia (3–2), Sunday 10 a.m.

The Vikings have been the best defensive team in the league this year and are well-rested after their bye week. They will be facing an Eagles team reeling after consecutive defeats and starting a rookie quarterback, and rookie replacement right tackle. Advantage Vikings.

Prediction: Vikings 24 Eagles 9

Cleveland (0–6) at Cincinnati (2–4), Sunday 10 a.m.

Cleveland came agonizingly close to another victory, falling 28–26 to the Titans last week. The Bengals were actually right in it with the Patriots deep into the third quarter until things slipped away. The veteran and experienced Bengals come to play in a big way and take care of business against their state rivals.

Prediction: Bengals 35 Browns 20

Indianapolis (2–4) at Tennessee (3–3), Sunday 10 a.m.

Not another game in this irrelevant division. Tennessee has an identity with a solid run game whereas the Colts have a great quarterback and nothing else.

Prediction: Titans 27 Colts 21

Washington (4–2) at Detroit (3–3), Sunday 10 a.m.

Both of these teams are on a roll, with the Lions winning back-to-back games and Washington reeling off four straight wins. I like the Lions to take care of business at home in a barnburner against a Washington team that has found its rhythm offensively.

Prediction: Lions 39 Washington 33

Tampa Bay (2–3) at San Francisco (1–5), Sunday 1:05 p.m.

I like Tampa Bay in this matchup of teams with losing records, because they have more talent on the offensive side of the ball. Receiver Mike Evans is one of the best in the league and running back Jacquizz Rodgers is coming off a 101-yard game against Carolina. Niners quarterback Colin Kaepernick is a playmaker but has below average receivers and will be without top running back Carlos Hyde.

Prediction: Buccaneers 28 49ers 24

San Diego (2–4) at Atlanta (4–2), Sunday 1:05 p.m.

San Diego’s record is deceiving because all four of the team’s losses were by the slimmest of margins. The Falcons are very good and a tough out at home. Look for another strong game from Falcons quarterback Matt Ryan and his dual threat running backs, Tevin Coleman and Devonta Freeman.

Prediction: Falcons 37 Chargers 31

New England (5–1) at Pittsburgh (4–2), Sunday 1:25 p.m.

This could easily be the game of the week and a possible AFC Conference Final preview. However, Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger is hurt and his backup, Landry Jones, was ineffective during Big Ben’s last injury. By the way, Tom Brady just had the best two-game stretch of his illustrious career. Look for him to keep it going as the Patriots earn a 6–1 start against a great Steelers team.

Prediction: Patriots 30 Steelers 19

Game of the Week

Seattle (4–1) at Arizona (3–3), Sunday 5:30 p.m.

Now this is the type of matchup I expect of a Sunday night showdown. This has been one of the best rivalries in football, with each of these teams being amongst the NFL’s elite over the past few years. The Cardinals started the season 1–3, but won their last two games and looked very good last week in a 28–3 beatdown of the Jets. The Seahawks are coming off a victory over the Falcons, in another instance of late-game magic by Russell Wilson. I am going to roll with the Cardinals at home, despite the uncertainty of Cardinals quarterback Carson Palmer’s wonky hamstring. Drew Stanton better step up and defend my pick if Palmer can’t go.

Prediction: Cardinals 23 Seahawks 20

Houston (4–2) at Denver (4–2), Monday 5:30 p.m.

This offseason, former Broncos quarterback Brock Osweiler rejected a generous contract offer to succeed legend Peyton Manning and opted to sign with the Houston Texans for more money. Now he returns to face his former team in what is feeling like the dawn of a public execution in the Wild West. This week, Broncos linebacker Brandon Marshall was asked about Osweiler’s return. He said, “We just want to kill him.” Denver has a fantastic defence and will be facing a Houston team whose 4–2 record is a mirage, as two of those wins came in their very weak division and one of them was over the 1–5 Bears. Look for the Broncos to win big and get their revenge.

Prediction: Broncos 31 Texans 3