By Jacob Samuel at The Daily Snooze
Reciprocal oral is good for couples
By Ms. X
“My boyfriend always asks for blowjobs before we have sex, but I never know if he wants me to get him off or if he is just looking for a warm up. He has never initiated going down on me, and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want to. If he does climax, then is it OK for me to ask him to reciprocate?”
Blowjobs are a pretty hot topic amongst students, along with oral in general. But is oral foreplay or a replacement for sex? There are times when the oral component to sex can just be foreplay, and other times when all you need is a little head before bed. It can save time and mess to keep things strictly oral, but there really is no single answer.
To answer the second part of your question, if your boyfriend is only looking for some head, it’s completely okay to ask that the favour be returned. In the end, you deserve to be just as satisfied as your partner. Rumours have always persisted that men don’t like to go down on girls, but that’s no excuse to let him get away with it. Making you orgasm may give him some satisfaction and perhaps change his mind about venturing down there.
One easy way to introduce your man to eating you out and get him excited about doing it is to propose the 69 position. Pleasing each other at the same time will ensure you both leave the bedroom satisfied.
If you want to let him know what you want, being direct with it will definitely get your point across. To tell him straight up that it’s only fair for him to equalize your oral adventures is not asking too much. However, it can be a vulnerable time when you’re already in the bedroom, so if you are worried about asking him then, find a time to bring up the conversation elsewhere. If you think he may pick up on hints, making small comments about wanting him to take the dive may send the right message.
It is also entirely possible that your man may be unsure or unconfident about his skills. It is important that you make the situation comfortable not only for yourself, but for him too. When he does go down on you, make sure he knows he’s doing a good job. Vocal reassurance is important for him so that he will continue to do it in the future. Feel free to give direction, as he will likely appreciate the advice, and the fact that you know what you want may even serve as a turn-on for him.
The next time the two of you start fooling around, don’t worry about the expectations he has for your oral fun to turn into sex. There doesn’t need to be a clear definition of the expectations for every intimate session. But please, don’t let him get away any longer without doing his fair share. Whatever way you are comfortable doing it, you are more than entitled to introduce your boyfriend into the world of muff diving. Little does he know, contrary to the rumours, pleasing you may be pleasing for him as well.
Freaks and Geeks: A look at Fan Expo Vancouver and fan culture
By Alison Roach
Within 10 minutes of walking into the Vancouver Convention Centre, I’d seen Batman, Jack Sparrow (complete with swagger), a girl in a wig and fishnets (and not much else), an inhabitant of Avatar’s foreign planet, and Iron Man blasting his theme from a boom box. When I’d first been invited to attend Fan Expo Vancouver, I expected it to be all about comic books and shows set in space, but it quickly became clear that this was something much larger than that. This was a day for fandom.
In late April, Fan Expo came to Vancouver, proclaiming itself “Vancouver’s first major comicon.” Though Fan Expo has graced Toronto since 1995, it hadn’t made it to the west coast until now, and the waiting audience responded eagerly. By the time the doors to the convention opened at 10 a.m. the line was already curling around the waiting area, with dozens of people joining every minute. By noon, the line extended outside, covering the sidewalk all the way down to Canada Place, half a city block. Half an hour later, the line was cut; the centre had taken in all the fans it possibly could.
What lay inside was a carnival. After braving the line, attendees descended down the rabbit hole into the bowels of the Convention Centre, diving into a world of storytelling and fantasy. The core of the expo was a huge space, jam-packed with merchandise booths, signing areas, photo op and gaming spaces, and an authentic Batmobile at the centre of it all. It was an enormous jumble of $1 comic books, fan t-shirts, and attractions (most of these in costume). Looking around, you could spot homages to everything from Labyrinth, to Star Wars, to Portal, to Ghostbusters. This was a fan’s paradise, and it extended way beyond comic books: it was a celebration of pop culture.
The headliners of the convention included Lou Ferrigno (the original Hulk), Kevin Sorbo (yeah, he was Hercules), John DeLancie (of Star Trek fame), and Kristin Bauer (foul-mouthed Pam of True Blood). And of course, Adam West and Burt Ward, the original Batman and Robin. The guests weren’t confined to a single genre either; guest Alan Ruck is still recognizable as Ferris’ best friend Cameron in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. Tom Felton, the sneering blonde from Harry Potter, was supposed to appear as well, but, in a typical Malfoy move, cancelled at the last minute. Odds are that these names ring a bell and you would recognize these actors, even if their faces don’t materialize to you right away. Or maybe you’ve loved them as a part of what made your favourite show great. I know I was pretty fucking excited when I realized that I was going to be in the same room as Nicholas Brendon — Buffy the Vampire Slayer’s Xander. I had only seen every single episode, twice. No big deal.
The convention was like a festival; like Halloween. There was a feeling that you could be anyone or do anything without judgment. For an entire hour I sat beside a man that dressed up as Dr. Evil, and he didn’t break character once. When another fan beside us mentioned that he was going to school to become a lawyer, the doctor looked at him slyly; signature pinky up , and remarked, “Oh, so you’re on your way to becoming . . . evil.” At Fan Expo, no costume was too outlandish, no reference too obscure. This was the antithesis of hipsters: instead of not caring at all, they did care. A lot. They cared about special effects, character arcs, mythologies, and on-set happenings. It didn’t seem to matter how long ago these actors and creators had put their work out into the world, these industry conversations were still important to those having them.
Fan Expo was not only a chance to become the characters that you love and admire the most, it was a chance to interact with them. Throughout the day, actors were available for autograph signings, photo ops, scheduled panels and Q&A sessions. The panels for newer shows were a bit more formal, but the sessions with veteran actors whose characters have been revered for years were easygoing conversations. At the open John de Lancie Q&A panel, Zack Mead, a nervous fan, came up to the microphone to ask the former Star Trek: The Next Generation actor a question. Mead pointed his camera at de Lancie to capture the answer. De Lancie, amused, quickly pulled out his own cell phone and, mirroring the fan, pointed it at Mead before urging him to ask his question. The crowd laughed with Mead, and cheered as he asked de Lancie a question about his cult role in My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic. Afterwards, Mead said that he had come mainly for de Lancie. “He’s a phenomenon.”
This was the case for other appearances. Nicholas Brendan of Buffy fame joked comfortably with the audience, acknowledging his tendency to use higher than PG-13 language: “So if you’re 12 and under, go fuck yourself.” He did his signature Snoopy dance and sang a snippet from the fan-favourite episode, “Once More with Feeling.” When asked what was the most interesting thing he’d ever received from a fan, he answered, “Gonorrhea, probably.”
Adam West and Burt Ward took things to a whole new level. 50 years of being cultural institutions, and friends, made the pair of them something to behold. Throughout the day I asked dozens of people what they most wanted to see, and the most popular answer by far was Adam West. The original Batman series aired between 1966-1968, but the men who played the original Batman and Robin are still legends. The room was packed, and on the stage the pair was relaxed and cavalier. They reminisced about on-set shenanigans (“Remember that time I ad-libbed that line about the Batgirl statue Burt? ‘Don’t touch that golden pussy!’”), and reflected on the show’s satire and controversies. West, whose booming drawl has made Family Guy’s mayor of Quahog famous, even shared a line from the latest episode: “I need to see your penis!” The hour ended sensationally, when a leather-clad Catwoman purred an indecent proposal to West about meeting up later. West and Ward left to an enormous wave of applause.
There was also a significant and recurring reference to the city that ran throughout the day: two new shows that were being promoted and discussed in panels — Continuum and Primeval — both shot in Vancouver. The idea of the city as ‘Hollywood North’ is nothing new, but these two shows are doing something different: Stanley Park is acknowledged as Stanley Park, street signs are shown, and local haunts are features. As one of the producers of Primeval pointed out, one phrase can sum up the reason behind Vancouver’s sudden attraction: the Olympics. The world knows our city now, and Vancouver can be shown as itself. The director of Continuum remarked, “I’m proud of my city, and I want to show it off.” Sure, these two shows deal with the revival of dinosaurs and time travel, respectively, but those dinosaurs are destroying Vancouver, not Vancouver masquerading as Seattle. This trend seems to signify a welcome shift in the perception of this city. One attendee asked the panel of Continuum cheekily: “In 2077, why haven’t you done anything about the Lions Gate Bridge?”
Fan Expo was an event where costumed fans were able to go up and talk to one another without hesitation. The environment was open and easy to navigate because everyone was there for the same reason: they loved entertainment culture. Approaching someone in costume was easy, because they weren’t themselves; they were the character you recognized from that movie, or TV show, or video game. A man in a full Iron Man costume and another in an equally decked-out Halo soldier getup stood and posed for pictures with people for the entire day. Their enthusiasm made it seem as if they were being paid to do it, but when I asked them what their role in the convention was, Iron Man answered with surprise, “We’re just here as fans.” I’m sure that every single other person at Fan Expo would have said the same thing, star guests included. Everyone was there to pay tribute to pop culture, to show how much they cared about these shows, their characters, and their stories. They were all there to be fans.
Heathy, able-bodied woman refused to give up bus seat to man in wheelchair
By Brad McLeod
SEATTLE— A Seattle woman has been arrested today for disregarding national and state law when she refused to give up her priority front-row bus seat to a man in a wheelchair.
Jane Cartwright, a 40-year-old activist from Kirkland, Washington and self-proclaimed Rosa Parks of her generation was fined $50 yesterday for refusing to obey the common public transportation courtesy that states “the elderly and disabled” have priority in the front seats of the bus in order to accommodate easy entry and exiting.
Although the general consensus from fellow passengers and onlookers was that the woman was simply acting like a “massive jerk” when she refused to move from her seat to allow the man, who is paralyzed with a spinal cord injury, to board, Ms. Cartwright has described the events as a crime of passion against a prejudiced, antiquated law.
“I was tired; I had been on my feet all day working, so I took a seat at the front,” Cartwright told the media shortly after being released from county jail. “And then I’m just supposed to give it up because some entitled handicapped person who’s been sitting on his ass all day is too lazy to roll his way to the back?”
Despite being clearly at fault both legally and ethically, Cartwright believes the way society has treated able-bodied citizens such as herself is highly discriminatory and needs to come to an end.
“Why should I have to suffer?” she sputtered, grasping at straws, “I didn’t ask to be not-handicapped, why should they get all the breaks? Bus seats, parking spots, and . . . uh . . . wheelchair basketball. I mean, what do normal people have that’s even close that?”
As of yet, no one has supported Cartwright in her fight against people suffering with crippling physical disabilities, but experts in the field of activism have warned to not rush to judgment too quickly.
“It’s tough these days, when you’re in the activist game, to find what’s going to be that ‘next big movement,’” said Dr. Hugh Maclean, a radical ‘60s protestor turned stuffy professor, “Ms. Cartwright is at a huge disadvantage being a white, heterosexual, financially stable woman — there aren’t a lot of real problems for her; it was either this or a war on Frappuccino prices”.
Although a stand against a Starbucks novelty drink surely would have garnered more support, Cartwright is now stuck fighting a battle that will never become a national cause, nor warrant a coloured ribbon.
Nevertheless, she vows to keep her protest going until bus seats at the front are reserved for only the pushiest, laziest people in the world, or as she described it, “What Rosa Parks dreamed of.” Reporters have yet to confirm whether Mrs. Parks, or the wheelchair she rode later in life, were in fact spinning in her grave.
Join the Club: The Urban Hunter-Gatherers’ Club!
New to SFU? Missed clubs day? Finding it hard to make friends? Tired of sitting alone on Friday nights alphabetizing your tablespoons of the world collection? Well I’ll bet there’s a club that’ll help you cope with your crippling social phobias! “Join The Club” is a feature that showcases some of SFU’s lesser known clubs!
This week we highlight . . . The Urban Hunter-Gatherers’ Club!
Are you a Katniss wannabe? Are you a fan of eating locally? Are you tired of being shackled to the oppressive totalitarian structure known as Nesters? The Urban Hunter-Gatherers’ Club is. Come out to one of our weekly meetings, where we’ll teach you how to live off the fatta the lan’, or more accurately, the fatta the dumpster behind Walgreens. We can show you how to hunt local wildlife (rabbits, squirrels, house pets, stray children, etc.) and which plants to avoid when foraging. (Hint: It’s the ones that start with “poison;” ivy, sumac, etc.) We guarantee that once you’ve killed something, and eaten it raw and bleeding, you’ll never go back.
Petter Watch: May 21st
Petter reading box over breakfast; wonders if he’s getting enough thiamine.
News Beat: May 21st
Facebook terrorist cell hi-jacks profile page
At approximately 1300 hours this afternoon, the sovereign state of one Annie Helgusson’s profile page was viciously and ruthlessly attacked by a rogue cell of Facebook terrorists.
The attack occurred on the outskirts of the Grandview Mall, in the Apple Store district. The extremists were able to access the page after Helgusson failed to log out of a display computer after posting a status update.
Mark Chen, an Apple Store employee and eyewitness, retells the horrifying events.
“They rolled in like sharks smelling blood on the water. It was a slaughter. Fake status updates. They made her like every Nickelback fan page. All 27 of them. They even changed her profile picture. Her profile picture for god’s sakes.”
These events echo other senseless acts of e-violence from the past, including the MySpace Massacre and the #PanAm140.
– Allie Albertson
Sunglasses co-opted as chest decoration
Move over, backwards baseball caps and triple-popped polos, there’s a new douchebag accessory that’s sweeping the nation’s tanning salons and gyms at 10:30 in the morning.
Straight from the runways of Jersey beaches, the “sunglasses hanging between your enormous pecs” is the must have look this season since being debuted by prominent douchebag fashion designer Edward Hardy.
Chas Powers, a prominent fashion brah-gger posts about the new look. “Look dog, this shit is tight. These shades right here? Ray-Bans. You gotta spend money to make money, ye-yah. But you put these on your face, you’ll never see them. But right here? Boom. Hanging from the front of this Hardy, like the bitches gonna be hanging off me.”
This craze has sent shockwaves through the douchebag fashion community, the likes of which haven’t been seen since the invention of the double V-neck.
– Bill Bellingham
New study shows that dolphin ‘most evil animals’
A new study published by Vatican scientists shocked the world last week, as it was discovered the dolphin is the most evil animal.
Rosa Bianchi, director of the study told The Peak, “We were able to determine how evil an animal was by placing it in a small cage with a human baby. Babies are notorious for their ability to sense the intrinsic good or evil of an animal. We went through a lot of babies.”
“The babies showed the most adverse reaction to the dolphin, more than rats, black widows, king cobras or even mosquitoes. Further study confirms this, showing that dolphins are known to engage in rape and murder for pleasure. No, seriously, go look it up, this part isn’t a joke.
Humans were a notable exclusion from the experiment, “for the same reason you don’t bring Wayne Gretzky to your neighbourhood street hockey.”
– Carl Carlweather
By Gary Lim
SFSS board shorts
By David Dyck
Negotiations approved for new food vendors
The Atrium cafeteria will be seeing new food vendors coming in as renovations on the space continue. Two of the vendors that the board has approved for the renovated area are Opa!, a Greek food vendor, and Chartwells, for a Denny’s Fresh Express. “We think that the brand recognition and the amount of foot traffic to the food court will be pretty substantial, so we think there’s a great advantage there,” said treasurer Kevin Zhang about the Denny’s Fresh Express. There will be one more vendor coming in which is yet to be determined.
Health Sciences representative takes leave of absence for the summer
Newly elected faculty representative Tracy Luong has requested a leave of absence for the summer semester. In a letter addressed to the board, she explained that she was offered an extension on her co-op work term during the campaign period. “I am committed to doing my part and contributing to the operations of the board as much as possible,” stated the letter. According to policy, board members are allowed only two months unpaid leave of absence. The board agreed to allow Luong standing regrets to excuse her from meetings in May and August, and a leave of absence for June and July.
The Purity Myth deconstructs the virgin mystique
By Alex Kress (CUP)
Abstinence-only sex ed not only expose teenagers to risky behaviour, but also perpetuates harmful ideas about virginity and sexuality
FREDERICTON (CUP) — Women, imagine a ripe cherry being violently smashed to bits with a mallet. Some abstinence-only educators want young women to liken the violent image to the breaking of the hymen during sex — a vaginal membrane often erroneously believed to signify virginity — in a scene from the documentary The Purity Myth.
So, imagine a mallet to your hymen. Did you wince?
That’s exactly the reaction these educators want from young women; the hope is if women thought about having sex before, they’ll think twice about it after that gory display.
However, that’s not exactly accurate. The documentary, which is based on Jessica Valenti’s book that exposes the failures of abstinence-only education and aims to dispel the argument that a woman’s value is based on her virginity, claims that abstinence-only education actually provokes the opposite effect.
It doesn’t work. And worse, the film says 80 per cent of abstinence-only education contains false information. As a result, teens are engaging in high-risk sexual behaviour. They’re not armed with the knowledge that they can contract sexually transmitted infections (STIs) from unprotected oral and anal sex, but what they are told is that vaginal intercourse before marriage is off limits.
You can see the confusion here.
The Purity Myth screening at the University of New Brunswick, funded by the University Women’s Centre and the UNBSU women’s liaison, exposes the fanaticism of “a moral panic over sexuality” in the United States and the rhetoric that’s spewed in schools at the cost of taxpayers — $1.3 billion since 1996 — despite 82 per cent of Americans supporting proper sexual education programs.
And then, there are the purity balls. These archaic, downright creepy ceremonies involve young girls — sometimes as young as six or seven years old — and their fathers. The girls get dolled up in ball gowns with fancy up-dos and makeup and pledge their virginity to their fathers until marriage; their fathers dress in tuxedos and pledge to protect their daughters’s virginities until they’re married.
It’s unsettling, to say the least. These girls are being identified as sex objects as young as six; they don’t even know what sex is. “Women are still led to believe that our moral compass lies somewhere between our legs — literally,” said Jessica Valenti, producer of the film. “There’s this antiquated notion that fathers own their daughters’ sexuality.”
The segment on pop star Jessica Simpson was particularly disturbing. Evidently, she pledged her virginity to her father in a purity ball. Then she married Nick Lachey and had free reign to ravish him, much to her dad’s delight.
“We’re celebrating the fact that she can do it ‘till she’s blue in the face,” said Joe Simpson, smiling, after his daughter’s marriage.
Shudder. Weird.
The film touches on other subjects surrounding virginity like “legislating chastity,” via the Republican effort to defund abortion and the Plan B emergency contraceptive, and vaginal rejuvenation surgery, which has become the fastest growing form of plastic surgery in the U.S.
While it would’ve been interesting to see the documentary extended to include commentary from young adults who have received abstinence-only education, the film was effective in relaying its overall message: women must be regarded as having more depth to them than what’s between their legs. They have brains, compassion and power.
The discussion following the film raised some shocking anecdotal information about sex education in New Brunswick and Nova Scotia, or rather the disappointing lack thereof. One woman said she recalled that the guidance counselor who was in charge of teaching sex education at her school chose not to because he felt it conflicted with his religion. Megan Glenwright, women’s liaison for the UNBSU, said she recalled having very minimal sex education and not being able to keep track of the pregnant girls at her high school.
It’s clear that a dialogue needs to begin in New Brunswick about the importance of sex education, especially with this province’s recent outbreak of syphilis, which continues to worsen. Each woman has a right to remain a virgin, of course, but it shouldn’t be at the risk of ignorance about sex.
