Why do we need all these gender options, anyway?

Because not everyone thinks of themselves as a man or a woman, and that’s okay. Most people tend to place themselves into one of these two categories, but there’s all sorts of folks who don’t feel like they fit into either box — or that they fit into both — and their gender identity is no less valid than anyone else’s. In supplying 56 custom gender options (in lieu of a previous three), Facebook has recognized that gender identity is much more complex than the usual binary.

Gender is a set of culturally learned practices, and a tool through which people build and reflect their identities.

We tend to be taught from a young age that gender is inextricable from biological sex, but that just isn’t the case. Though your doctor more than likely labelled you as either male or female as soon as you were born, it’s ultimately up to you to choose which gender suits you best — and it very well might be neither of those choices.

Sex and gender are totally separate terms. Sex refers to your chromosomes, your genitals and everything else to do with biology (to be clear, we’re not talking the verb sex, which is something totally different). Gender, however, is a set of culturally learned practices, and a tool through which people build and reflect their identities. Whatever behaviours you think of as “masculine” or “feminine” are that way because of the culture we live in, and the beliefs it supports and indoctrinates.

In allowing people to choose the gender that best reflects them, Facebook has taken an important step in recognizing the scope of gender identities and respecting the right of every individual to choose whichever term best reflects who they are.

I’ve never heard of some of these terms. What do they mean?

I’m glad you asked. For starters, most of you reading this are probably cisgender — that means your gender matches up with your biological sex. For example, if you’ve got male genetalia and chromosomes and you identify as a man, that makes you cisgender, or cis.

Trans folks identify with a separate gender than their biological sex dictates — using an asterisk after the term trans implies that you’re including each and every gender option (and sex option) that a trans person might be. Some trans people will include their preferred gender identity after the word trans, such as “trans man”; others will settle for “trans” or “transgender.”

Agender people don’t identify with any gender, and feel they’re better off not having a gender at all. Gender fluid, genderqueer and gender nonconforming people all fit somewhere in the middle of the gender spectrum, and some don’t tie themselves down to a single definition, preferring to define their identity on a day-to-day basis.

Most of you reading this are probably cisgender — that means your gender matches up with your biological sex.

Bigender people — you guessed it — identify with both male and female genders, and pangender folks identify as all genders at once. Two-spirit is a term used in over 130 First Nations tribes; it describes those who don’t fit on either side of the gender binary, but have aspects of both male and female genders.

I’m a cisgender woman. Should I choose the “woman” option, or the “cis woman” option? What’s the difference?

Either! Facebook’s custom options are extensive, and to be fair, there’s a little bit of overlap. There is, however a difference between these two terms: a cis woman is a very specific description of a unique gender identity, whereas the term “woman” is a lot more interpretable, and can be used to describe a whole subset of genders. If in doubt, choose the term you feel best describes who you are, and what gender you best identify with — however you would describe yourself to your friends, family, and partner.

What do pronouns have to do with all of this?

Along with their new gender options, Facebook has fine-tuned its user settings by including a drop-down menu with pronoun choices: him, her, and the agendered them. The pronouns you use to identify someone are an important part of how you relate to that person, and it’s your job to make sure that you’re using the correct pronouns with whomever you meet. Facebook’s inclusion of pronoun customization is a useful tool for people too nervous to ask someone for their preferred gender pronouns — or PGPs — in person. It’s also a nice way for people to dictate which PGPs they prefer without having to constantly correct the people around them.

Why is there still an “other” option? Doesn’t this cover all the bases?

Not quite. Like all facets of your identity (style, tastes, personality, and so on), gender is a process of constant reinvention — and like all inventions, some of them have yet to be discovered. Despite the admittedly exhaustive nature of Facebook’s custom options, kudos to them for leaving the door open for new possibilities, and for giving those who don’t feel like putting their gender into a single category — or feel like it isn’t anyone else’s damn business — a choice to match.