Saturday Fight Night: The vengeful Ah Choo vs. the undefeated Seasonal Allergies

By: Izzy Cheung, Arts & Culture Editor Snee: Welcome back to another installment of Saturday Fight Night! My name is Snee, and tonight, I’ll be...

Landlord looking for tenant who swears to never enter the unit under any circumstances

By: C Icart, Humour Editor After years of relying on their tenants to pay their mortgage, local landlord Gil T. Leech has finally reached a...

Sitting in the dark because these motion sensor lights are pissing me off

By: C Icart, Humour Editor This year marks the fourth time SFU ranks number one in so-called Canada for innovation, and if this is what...

Minimum wage worker doing the job of three people is excited for 65 cent wage increase

By: Hailey Miller, Staff Writer and C Icart, Humour Editor News anchor: Alexa, play “7 rings” because the minimum wage is increasing to a whopping...

Move out of the way cisheteros, it’s not about you this month

By: Cam Darting, SFU Student I think it’s time to move to a different city and start anew. Everyone around me is a fake ally....

An SFU background extra tell-all

By: Petra Chase, Editor-in-Chief SFU students have been observing a strange phenomenon across campuses — more and more common areas filled with students just hanging...

Joy Johnson realizes she took her guard down too soon

By: Freida Watermelon, SFU Student Content warning: mentions of genocide. Joy Johnson is exasperated because she does not know what more she could’ve done! The Board...

Gen Z learning Gen Alpha slang to beat “aging like milk” allegations

By: C Icart, Humour Editor A local Zoomer (they did not want to be referred to as such, but this is my article and I...

Everyone hates the stairwell detour at Commercial-Broadway

By: Hailey Miller, Staff Writer If you’re a regular SkyTrain-goer in Vancouver, chances are you’re no stranger to being outrageously inconvenienced. Now, TransLink wants us...

Joy Johnson breathes a sigh of relief because there is no SFU encampment

By: Freida Watermelon, SFU Student Content warning: mentions of genocide. As she was sitting in her office reading the most recent message from the UBC president...