In his book Who is the Good Boy? Professor Bark Ruffington discusses life’s morality and the question of how to define good and bad. The book has already become globally recognized as classic philosophical literature, while academics are calling it “a revolutionary theory of life” and “as groundbreaking as the toilet bowl.” The professor spoke to The Peak about his novel, his theories, and his paw-spective of the world.
The Peak: What inspired you to write this novel?
Bark Ruffington: Well, in recent times I’ve been chasing my tail around a lot, contemplating my life on this dog-gone planet. I am getting up there, age-wise; I’m a whole seven years old now. It’s the right time to think about my life, and life in general. Socrates was quoted as saying that “the unexamined life is not worth living,” so I’ve always tried to live by that motto by sniffing out the big questions and trying to dig out the answers.
P: Can you speak further on your theory of the fire hydrant?
BR: In the real world, the fire hydrant exists as a reminder that our moment of the wind blowing through our ears is fleeting and that we must look to mark the world with our individuality. Metaphorically, the fire hydrant is the chance to create a legacy for ourselves. We have a short moment to make our mark, so we’ve got to rear our legs up and pee triumphantly — a pee that will never be forgotten.
P: How does one free themselves from the so-called “oppressor mailman”?
BR: The freedom of self is not a simple one; there is no dog-ma for freedom. Simply put, one must look deep into their mind’s bone and realize that the mailman is not a threat worth their fury; the mailman represents a primal urge we must accept then release. We must do more meditative things to become the good boy — for example, one could hump a leg or chew a particularly squeaky chew toy.
P: What do you mean when you say that “we must all sniff the butt of the common dog”?
BR: The good boy cannot exist if he does not see that we are all inherently good boys — he must understand that we are all one. We must sniff deep into the butts of others and look to understand each other, understand that we are all yearning to be the good boy.
P: So, do you know who the good boy is?
BR: I feel like there is no answer to that question. Because the good boy is simply a symbol of the dog we all aspire to be, there is no one single good boy. The good boy is us at times, and he is the image of us we wish for too. He is a metaphor, an illusion, a concept for us to chase the same way we chase cars.
P: No, the good boy is you! You’re a good boy!!
The interview with the professor ended there — after a round of great belly rubs, some eager tail wagging, and a serious head patting.
