Go back

COLUMN | LIST BITCH: Six things that don’t make you a ‘nice guy’

Opinions
EIC
EIC
1 min.
0
1160

List Bitch is a new web-exclusive column featuring feisty, unapologetic listicles on life. Click here for more, and check back each week for new content!

 

[dropcap]A[/dropcap]s a fairly young university student, I constantly hear people fawning over guys for things that are either unimportant or the bare minimum. In case you were wondering whether or not that frat bro or protein snorter are actually real “nice guys,” then read on.

1. Not having sex with drunk girls

 

Now listen carefully, because apparently this is a difficult concept for some to grasp. Too many guys I have come across seem to expect a pat on the back for this. Congratulations for not being a fucking rapist, would you like a round of applause?

2. Being cordial about the friend zone

 

If, God forbid, you are one of those whiny manipulative men who can’t stop complaining about the ‘friend zone’ then please, do us all a favour and stop talking. It’s not cute, it’s not funny, and it’s not necessary. If your kindness has baggage or an expiration date, then I (and most of my fellow females) don’t want it anyway.

3. Dressing nice

 

I get it, you clearly have access to a shower and a Gap catalogue. Unfortunately for you, even your most pristine Sperry Topsiders fail to distract from the fact that you reek of douche.

4. Opening the door for people

 

Granted, this is a nice gesture we all appreciate — despite being common courtesy. Just please leave your misogyny out of it. If you have a penis and I open a door for you, please walk through it without any huffing and puffing. I get it, I can smell your testosterone from here, but please make it easier on both of us and walk through the fucking door.

5. Tipping

 

Look, everyone should tip. Waiters do not make a living wage. Tipping is polite, expected, and not at all a mechanism for peacocking in front of your date. Chill.

6. Being a self-proclaimed ‘social’ liberal or democrat

 

Nothing is more ironic than listening in on guys who openly voted for Harper, and yet magically identify as an ally, feminist, environmentalist, and the like, when talking to certain girls. This is an age-old cop-out. Take responsibility for your political actions, and realize you cannot have it both ways.

Was this article helpful?
0
0

Leave a Reply

Block title

Threats to water security trigger emergency declaration by syilx Okanagan Nation

News Peak Web -
By: Tomos Land, Staff Writer Editor’s note: The Peak spells nsyilxcən words in lowercase in accordance with syilx language holders who say that capitalization implies a hierarchy of importance, which does  not align with syilx ethics.  Growing water insecurity, driven by climate change and its cascading effects in BC, has led to a recent declaration of a watershed emergency by the syilx Okanagan Nation Alliance (ONA). The alliance is a First Nations government “comprised of seven member communities in the Southern Interior of BC: Okanagan Indian Band, Osoyoos Indian Band, Penticton Indian Band, Upper Nicola Band, Upper and Lower Similkameen Indian Bands, and Westbank First Nation; and in Northern Washington State, the Colville Confederated Tribes,” according to the ONA website. The announcement comes after members of...

Read Next

Block title

Threats to water security trigger emergency declaration by syilx Okanagan Nation

News Peak Web -
By: Tomos Land, Staff Writer Editor’s note: The Peak spells nsyilxcən words in lowercase in accordance with syilx language holders who say that capitalization implies a hierarchy of importance, which does  not align with syilx ethics.  Growing water insecurity, driven by climate change and its cascading effects in BC, has led to a recent declaration of a watershed emergency by the syilx Okanagan Nation Alliance (ONA). The alliance is a First Nations government “comprised of seven member communities in the Southern Interior of BC: Okanagan Indian Band, Osoyoos Indian Band, Penticton Indian Band, Upper Nicola Band, Upper and Lower Similkameen Indian Bands, and Westbank First Nation; and in Northern Washington State, the Colville Confederated Tribes,” according to the ONA website. The announcement comes after members of...

Block title

Threats to water security trigger emergency declaration by syilx Okanagan Nation

News Peak Web -
By: Tomos Land, Staff Writer Editor’s note: The Peak spells nsyilxcən words in lowercase in accordance with syilx language holders who say that capitalization implies a hierarchy of importance, which does  not align with syilx ethics.  Growing water insecurity, driven by climate change and its cascading effects in BC, has led to a recent declaration of a watershed emergency by the syilx Okanagan Nation Alliance (ONA). The alliance is a First Nations government “comprised of seven member communities in the Southern Interior of BC: Okanagan Indian Band, Osoyoos Indian Band, Penticton Indian Band, Upper Nicola Band, Upper and Lower Similkameen Indian Bands, and Westbank First Nation; and in Northern Washington State, the Colville Confederated Tribes,” according to the ONA website. The announcement comes after members of...

Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

For advertising inquiries: [email protected]
For promotional inquiries: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society

Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

For advertising inquiries: [email protected]
For promotional inquiries: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society