Satire
You should probably be doing stuff
January 26, 2015“Life is what you make of it,” said some philosopher or other advice columnist at some point in all likelihood. They’re probably right, I guess. You should make the most out of life and get out and do stuff, like be active in the community or some other crap like that. Maybe join a club, get active in student politics, or help fund student advice columnists. (Note that that last one is your best option.) These kinds of things bring overwhelming self-satisfaction to who you are as an individual. They are valuable life experiences — notably that charitable donation to…
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TA successfully bluffs way through seminar without doing any of the readings
January 26, 2015Proving yet again that just because something’s a “required reading” doesn’t mean you actually have to read it, a teaching assistant in SFU’s English department coasted through last Monday’s 8:30 a.m. seminar to a somewhat satisfying degree. “It’s really not…
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Why I am not Charlie
January 26, 2015Since the tragic shootings in Paris revolving around comics published by the French satire magazine Charlie Hebdo, many people on the Internet have tried to show solidarity with the victims and their families by prominently making posts with the hashtag…
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Why white male privilege is problematic
January 11, 2015It’s no secret that white male privilege is problematic. But what exactly is privilege? What does it mean to be a white male? And why is all of this so problematic? While many authors would answer these questions with a…
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North Korean defector reveals that the size of Kim Jong-un’s threats subliminally reveal how small his penis actually is
January 5, 2015The secret is out: a North Korean defector now living in Seoul, South Korea, is claiming that the size of Kim Jong-un’s threats is connected to his small genitalia. With North Korean hostilities escalating in recent years — from repeated…
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Tony Hawk officially announces his endorsement of the Kinder Morgan half-pipeline
November 24, 2014Amidst a sea of protesters and environmental activists this week, skateboarding icon Tony Hawk has publicly announced that he is in favour of the proposed half-pipeline extension through Burnaby Mountain. If approved, the Kinder Morgan half-pipeline will be the largest…
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Gift cards, crisp $20 bills top this season’s list of most wanted gifts
November 24, 2014With Christmas still over a month away, the crunch is already on for some people trying to get their holiday shopping done before crowds take over the mall. Though data is still emerging on what retail items will be the…
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Let’s throw a 90s teen movie party
November 24, 2014Let’s do it. Let’s throw a 90s teen movie party. This will be our last chance to throw one. Maybe we’re all graduating from high school and going off to college soon; maybe we’re graduating from college and we’ll have…
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HUMOUR: Letter to the Editor
November 17, 2014Dear The Peak, A problem has recently come to my attention that I feel compelled to bring up with your readership. As a respectable individual and a member in good-standing with the community, I am asking people to please stop…
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Recently graduated English major experiences overwhelming financial, personal success
November 17, 2014Against all odds, a recent SFU graduate has shown the world how to make an arts degree work for him. After graduating with a degree in English (minor in liberal studies), 23-year-old Monay Maker struggled with one major roadblock: he…
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