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The 100 Year Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared

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EIC
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Teenage girls have their young adult adaptations; teenage boys have their super hero flicks; older folks, I suppose, have protagonists like Allan Karlson — a hundred year old man who flees his dreary retirement home to regain his independence. Alan goes on a journey involving biker gangs, millions of dollars, and elephants, and all the while, the film features flashbacks to his glory days which saw him dance drunk with Stalin and influence the Manhattan project.

This film sends positive messages about how older people can continue to lead youthful lives even into their golden years, while also presenting a pleasant story bursting with nostalgia and well-recognised historical references. This film is The Big Lebowski meets Forrest Gump for seniors.

There aren’t enough movies like this endearing Swedish film that has already broken box-office records in Scandinavia. The 100 Year Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared is a playful mess of a film, bursting with storytelling tangents, absurd contrivances, and ridiculous exaggerations; it’s like a tall tale told by an old man who is disenchanted with the blandness of living in a retirement home. It is all over the place, but that is the fun of it. 100 Year Old Man’s main flaw is also its greatest pleasure.

For all the crowd pleasing ingredients mixed into the batch, there is a surprising amount of dark humour that often changes the colour of the mix. Yet none of this comes off as offensive because each character in the film does the best they can in the situation they are in. No one in the film is a villain; everyone is in a tough position, which sometimes leads to ridiculous ends and humorous pain.

There is one gut-busting scene in the movie where Alan and another old man are being threatened by a biker who is trying to get $50 million back from the old man. The biker will be killed if he can’t return the money to its rightful owner, so he threatens the old man and his friend. The two seniors knock the biker out and throw him in a deep freezer, but they forget to shut the freezer off, because they probably have some form of dementia, and the poor guy freezes to death.

There is nothing deep or intellectual about this absurd film. It boils down reality and historical events to playful gags. It elevates those trapped to a place where they can forget about their current state through nostalgia for the past and optimism for the future.

Ballet Preljocaj’s Empty Moves (parts I, II, & III)

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EIC
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Set to John Cage’s Empty Words, this lengthy work featured four dancers completely in tune with each other and focused on the slightest of movements. The quartet demonstrated complete trust in each other as they manipulated each other into various positions and pushed and pulled themselves into elaborate formations where they were all connected. In the ultimate test of trust, one of the dancers stood straight up on the shoulders of another and fell backwards into the waiting arms of the other two.

With stiff, straight limbs, elaborate patterns, and many sequences of slow, deliberate movement, this choreography was fascinating to watch. There were a few contrasting sections of faster-paced movement with wonderful rhythms stomped out by the male dancers as they galloped around the stage. When all four of them moved in fast-paced unison, their fierce determination was a powerful sight.

Split into three parts that were each developed separately over the years, the sections were book-ended by the same sequence, marking each transition. These sequences also served as a slight break for the dancers as they passed a large water bottle around, incorporating the water break into their movements before continuing on.

Colouring their movements was the abstract composition of John Cage. Using an infamous 1977 recording of Empty Words, an increasingly disgruntled audience can be heard in the background as the minimalist composer calmly intones abstracted text that seems completely meaningless. Preljocaj’s choreography is an interpretation of this composition, while at the same time a juxtaposing response to it.

It is interesting to see the way a string of unconnected words, or even simple sounds, can still carry meaning for us. Similarly, the often stilted, precise movement of these dancers carries a great deal of meaning even though it is not fluid. Some would say the Cage recording is not music, just as some would say many contemporary dance works are not dance.

Preljocaj explained it well: “The notion of the alienation effect, of the disintegration of the movement and of a new manner of choreographic phrasing, takes precedence over meaning and essence. Through these means this dance work connects with the text by Henry David Thoreau which was John Cage’s starting point, and attempts to reach the unflappable pugnacity of the mastermind behind that evening [in 1977].”

Empty moves (part I) premiered in 2004 and (part II) was added in 2007. The full work consisting of all three parts premiered in June 2014 at the Montpellier Dance Festival. There is a fourth part to Cage’s recording, and Preljocaj intends to add the final instalment in the coming years.

For more information about The Dance Centre’s Global Dance Connections series, visit thedancecentre.ca.

This week in comics

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EIC
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peers6

Peers (Leslie Lu)

Knot your ordinary hero (by Eric Smith and Jacey Gibb)
Knot Your Ordinary Hero (Eric Smith & Jacey Gibb)

Local mom denies allegations that she’s mad, confirms she’s disappointed

By
EIC
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It’s possibile her son was forced to smoke against his will.

After hours of speculation from concerned family members, a mother from Vancouver has come out as saying that, although she isn’t mad at her son, she is certainly disappointed in him.

“I understand that he’s just at that age,” Martha Sydor, 47, announced in a calm yet very stern voice, “but that doesn’t mean he gets to disregard our house rules like that. I just don’t know what’s gotten into him lately.”

The announcement comes shortly after reports that her son Tanner came in two hours past curfew last night and smelled like cigarettes — though Tanner claims the scent originated from someone other than him.

“She’s just being controlling,” Tanner rebutted, following his mother’s comments. “I don’t even smoke. I was at a party and someone must have blown smoke on me, I swear.”

While she’s aware that Tanner had to grow up some day, Martha stands by earlier claims that she thought she and his father “had raised him better than this.” Investigation is still underway, but Martha isn’t ruling out the possibility that her sweet baby boy was overtaken at the party and pinned down, while someone forced him to smoke cigarettes against his will.

Whether the incident will affect Tanner’s ability to attend an upcoming Mother Mother concert is yet to be seen, but sources close to Martha say he will have to earn her trust back before she considers giving him and his friend a ride to the show.

Tanner has yet to release an official statement on his mother’s comments, but he’s responded to them directly by asking her to stay out of his room.

Great Pacific garbage patch discovered to be primarily stuff you’ve lost over the years

By
EIC
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Study has brought much-needed attention to the garbage patch’s high volumes of phone chargers and water bottles.

A study released by the United Nations Environment Programme (UNEP) has revealed what some environmentalists had already feared most: up to 90 per cent of the Great Pacific garbage patch is comprised of crap you’ve continued to lose or misplace over the years.

Widely recognized as the accumulation and literal manifestation of consumerism — particularly non-decomposable plastics and other side effects of a disposable consumer mindset — samples of the garbage patch indicate high levels of mismatched socks, Bic lighters, hair ties, iPod cords, and scrap pieces of paper with that cutie from the bar’s phone number on it.

“It’s troubling, to say the least,” UNEP specialist Kenny Wilkins told press following the announcement. “All of those times you falsely accused someone of taking your lighter or yelled at a sibling for losing the remote again. We never could have suspected this is where it was all going.”

The ballpoint pen and phone charger cesspool is located in the Pacific Ocean, between Asia and North America, and was first discovered back in 1997. Though the mass’ exact size has been difficult to estimate — with reports typically falling between the size of Texas to as big as the United States — scientists warn that it grows larger every day, “because you lost your keys again.”

“I doubt many would argue we’re facing one of the biggest environmental crises of our generation,” Wilkins continued. “It’s easy to lose track of an old shirt or your drunk friend Tiffany while outside of the club on a Friday night, but people need to be aware of where all these lost items are going. This out-of-sight, out-of-mind mentality is what caused the Pacific Garbage patch to form in the first place.”

While it’s still unclear what removal or deconstructive initiatives, if any, the UNEP has planned for the waste behemoth, Wilkins emphasized that efforts are focused on future prevention rather than immediate dismantling: “Unfortunately a lot of the damage has already been done; we can, however, work together to prevent the problem from getting worse. We have to realize that we’re not the ones who’ll have to live with the consequences. It’s our children and our children’s children who will be left to deal with a continent-sized mound of misplaced receipts for electronics we bought on an impulse.”

Several organizations, including Greenpeace Canada and the World Nature Organization, have already begun initiatives to encourage simple, low-cost ways with which people can stop losing their shit so it doesn’t end up part of the junk vortex. Earlier this week, Greenpeace launched the The Not-Lost Cause campaign to positive response, offering simple suggestions such as rolling your socks into pairs before putting them away, having a specific hook in your house designated for keys, and not getting so blackout drunk that you lose your wallet, phone, and dignity.

Independent poll finds Mel Gibson largely responsible for failed Scottish referendum

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EIC
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They can take your lives, but they can never take your associative memory of Mel Gibson. Image credit: Kenneth Uzodinma.

A poll by an independently-run UK group, conducted in the wake of the failed Scottish referendum, indicates that most registered voters opted against separation from the United Kingdom because of Mel Gibson’s supposed connection to Scottish independence. 

The poll, conducted by non-partisan group UK Statistics Authority, sought to compile and examine reasons behind the referendum’s surprising outcome. With a relatively high voter turnout of 84.6 per cent, 55.3 per cent voted against separation; of those in favour of staying a part of the United Kingdom, 61 per cent reported that their primary reason for voting “no” was the belief that Mel Gibson is somehow behind the Scottish independence movement.

“The fact that Braveheart holds a large sway over people’s ideas of what Scottish independence means can no longer be ignored,” said University of Dundee statistics professor Malcolm MacDuff, after digesting the poll’s findings. “I mean, it’s absolutely ludicrous that people still associate Mel Gibson with a role that’s almost 20 years old, but what are you going to do about it?”

Arguably Gibson’s most famous role, Braveheart found the actor portraying the iconic Sir William Wallace in his struggle for Scottish independence — the film is also widely regarded as the only film where Gibson’s radical traditionalist Catholic views aren’t overtly promoted.

“The number of Braveheart reruns on TV are so powerful that we now have conclusive proof that many ill-informed individuals actually believe Mel Gibson holds some form of leadership role within Scotland; his own personal beliefs are being mistakenly paired with what Scottish independence actually means.”

While Braveheart coincided with the height of Gibson’s popularity, the actor’s reputation has staggered in recent years, with repeated arrests for drunk driving, accusations of homophobia by numerous LGBTQ organizations, and the 1998 action-comedy Lethal Weapon 4. As a result, Scottish dreams of independence and many Scottish National Party (SNP) supporters find themselves in Gibson’s long shadow.

Ewan Stuart, a member of the SNP, said the poll’s results weren’t surprising but that the population should be better informed about current political figures, as well as Gibson’s later, more underrated films.

“That piece of shite makes all of us look like a bunch of boozy, anti-Semites and we simply aren’t,” fumed Stuart, “and I think we can all agree that Braveheart wasn’t his last great film. What about Signs? I’m sure no one’s walking around thinking Gibson’s actually a retired priest who’s struggling to keep his family together during an alien invasion. At least, I hope not.

“For god’s sake, the man is an actor, not the bloody First Minister of Scotland! Come on, people. Pick up a newspaper. At least read a Wikipedia article or something!”

In response to the poll’s findings, Stuart has begun advocating for a moratorium on Braveheart re-runs until Gibson is no longer viewed as an important political figure or until people stop parodying the famous William Wallace speech on Youtube — whichever comes first.

“We need to ban re-runs of Braveheart until the damage has been reversed. Or at the very least, make a reboot starring someone likeable and Scottish like Ewan McGregor.”

Savouring the Cinematheque volunteer experience

By
EIC
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It’s a busy life being a university student. Lectures, tutorials, papers, and exams quickly eat away the hours in the week, along with potential commitments to part-time jobs, clubs, and friends. As a film student, whose spare time is filled with 12-hour days on set, I have an especially busy schedule. So how in the world do I find time to volunteer on top of it all?

The answer is simple: I love working at the Pacific Cinematheque Theatre. Before I began volunteering at the theatre a year ago, I never thought of myself as the volunteer type. When I thought of volunteering I envisioned someone serving soup, or working with animals in a shelter — activities I could not see myself enjoying.

The Cinematheque is nothing like this. Instead I serve popcorn and sell tickets to moviegoers. Why then, you might ask, do I not work somewhere like a Silvercity Theatre where I can earn money and do the exact same thing?

The Cinematheque is no regular theatre, as it screens what I would call ‘essential cinema.’ These include new releases, classics, or rarely seen gems, which often stay with me long after I’ve left the theatre. I saw 2001: A Space Odyssey, E.T. the Extra Terrestrial, From Up on Poppy Hill, Tokyo Story, and even Dirty Dancing all for the first time at the Cinematheque.

The Cinematheque’s movies have inspired me with their craft and beauty.

These movies inspired me with their craft and beauty by stirring my emotions, and by making me question my assumptions about life. As a film student, it means a lot to me that there is a place in Vancouver that screens these types of films — films that otherwise wouldn’t be seen in theatres by audiences today.

The theatre is small, with only one screening room, and a modest number of volunteer employees. Without volunteers, the Cinematheque wouldn’t have the capacity to operate. The experiences this theatre provided me as a viewer inspired me to help keep it alive, so that others could experience essential cinema as I had.

Along with my passion for the work the Cinematheque does, I also volunteer at the theatre for the benefits it provides. As a regular volunteer working one shift per week, I receive a monthly pass to see free films at both the Cinematheque and Vancity theatres. This means I get free movies and popcorn!

I also have the privilege of working with amazing people. I’ve met passionate movie fans, creative artists, and made a few wacky friends along the way. We even hold volunteer parties where we all come together to watch movies. What else would we do?

All in all, volunteering at the Cinematheque has been a very fulfilling experience for me. Even with my hectic schedule, I still find it well worth my while to spend my Sunday afternoons at the theatre popping popcorn.

Week 10 in Champions League

By
EIC
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Bayern Munich took control of Group E.

It was a thrilling match day in the Champions League last Tuesday. There were a total of eight games, and a total of 20 goals were scored between them, an average of two and a half goals per game.

With an early start time — 9:00 a.m. here on the West Coast — Bayern Munich defeated CSKA Moscow one-nil. Thomas Muller scored the only goal of the game off of a penalty kick drawn by Mario Gotze, who was taken down from behind in the box after trying to dribble around a couple of defenders. Bayern dominated in possession, holding onto the ball for 73 per cent of the match. They are now in control of group E, with two wins in two matches so far in Europe.

The big match of the day was Paris St Germain (PSG) vs. Barcelona, the Group F matchup. The Parisians got the first goal, a left-footed shot by David Luiz from about 10 yards out. Barcelona responded just two minutes later with a beautiful goal, finished off by a strong left-footed strike from Lionel Messi, his 68th Champions League goal.

Marco Veratti gave PSG a 2-1 lead in the 26th minute — a header off a corner. Blaise Matuidi scored in the second half to put PSG up by two, but once again, Barcelona responded two minutes later with an excellent first time finish by Neymar, to cut the lead down to one. That’s as close as Barcelona would come, however, and the final score was 3-2 for PSG. This result leaves the group wide open, as both PSG, Barcelona, and to a lesser extent, Ajax, all now have a chance to take the top spot.

In another group E match, Manchester City took on Roma. The first goal of the game went to Man City as Sergio Aguero was pulled down in the box in the fourth minute, and calmly buried the ensuing penalty kick.

In the 23rd minute, Francesco Totti scored a wonderful chip shot to tie the game. With that goal, he became the oldest goalscorer in Champions League history, breaking the previous record set by Ryan Giggs. The game eventually ended in a 1-1 draw. Man City have made things hard on themselves with this draw — with only one point from their first two games, they’re going to need some wins in the near future if they want to progress.

Chelsea took on Sporting Lisbon in a group G clash. The only goal of the match was scored by Nemanja Matic, a header off of a free kick in the 34th minute. It was quite the even match, as both teams had 15 attempts on goal and the possession was almost split down the middle. Now with four points, Chelsea looks to be in control of the group.

In the other matches, Shaktar drew with Porto 2-2, Schalke 04 drew with Maribor 1-1, BATE beat Athletic Bilbao 2-1, and Ajax drew with Apoel Nicosia 1-1.

The Horvat Conundrum

By
EIC
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Bo Horvat was the ninth overall pick in 2013’s NHL Draft.

The Canucks have an interesting problem, and for once, it does not have to do with a lack of prospects. In fact, it’s the opposite: too many prospects and too little room. Specifically, I’m talking about Bo Horvat and the difficulty he presents.

Frankly, the AHL is the proper place for Horvat. He wouldn’t be pressured to be NHL-ready too fast, and he would become accustomed to playing in a professional league against men not boys, if you’ll pardon the expression.

However, there is a rule that prevents players aged 20 and under from going to the minor leagues unless they have already played four years in the junior leagues (CHL).

Now, the Canucks have to decide whether they want to bring Horvat up to the big leagues — where he would most likely play fourth-line minutes as he may not yet be NHL ready — or to send him back to juniors to essentially waste a year.

Horvat is the only prospect who is really stuck in this situation. The Canucks may be full on paper, but the other prospects who might be ready to contend for a spot on the team — such as Hunter Shinkaruk or Brendan Gaunce — have played four years in junior, and can go down to the AHL, where they can be called up at any time.

It also looks as though Horvat will shape up to be a possible shutdown forward, not necessarily lacking an offensive edge, but certainly showing more potential in his defensive game, which doesn’t necessarily help his position.

Typically, players who are more defence-oriented require some time in the AHL. To be fair, all players could use AHL time, but it’s usually the high scoring — or potentially high scoring — first-rounders who make the NHL right out juniors, not the defence-first potential future Selke winners.

In what doesn’t seem to be a very controversial opinion, I think that the ruling preventing junior-eligible players from playing in the AHL should be thrown out.

Perhaps the rule helps the CHL retain players, as opposed to watching them bolt when drafted. Or maybe it is meant to protect the players from being sent to the big leagues before they are ready.

But at the end of the day, we’re talking about player development. Oftentimes, a draft bust, or a player not reaching their full potential, can be attributed to rushing that player out of the juniors, straight into the NHL.

The rule, as it stands, forces teams to make a hard decision: either rush the player into the NHL, or leave him in the juniors to waste a crucial developmental year. Playing in the AHL would be a much better option in this case.

Luckily, the situation isn’t that dramatic this time around. Horvat can still play nine games in the NHL before his entry-level contract kicks in — he could still be returned to the juniors after getting a taste of the big leagues with no consequence (which seems like the likely outcome).

But there should be another choice. If the rule is in place to protect players, then it defeats its own purpose, forcing players to either develop too quickly or stall completely. If the rule is to protect the CHL, it could be adjusted to allow only first round picks to play in the AHL (players most likely to have outgrown the junior level). A change such as this could lead to fewer draft busts and a few more players reaching their full potential.

Sports Briefs

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EIC
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Cross-Country

The Clan cross-country teams competed in the Stanford Invitational on Saturday, October 66 in Palo Alto, CA. The men’s team placed third in their respective class, while the women placed second behind Chico State. Rebecca Bassett finished fourth among non-Division I competitors to lead the women’s team, while freshman Marc-Antoine Rouleau led the men’s team.

Women’s Soccer

The SFU women’s soccer team lost a tight game in overtime to the Western Washington Vikings Thursday night. The Clan were able to hang in for a scoreless 95 minutes before the Vikings put one past freshman goalkeeper Priya Sandhu, who made seven saves in an otherwise perfect night. With the loss — their first GNAC loss — they are now 2-1 in conference play.

Men’s Golf

Over the weekend, the SFU’s men’s golf team competed in the Golfweek Division II Fall Invitational held at the Crosswater Golf Course in Sunrise, OR. Great Northwest Athletic Conference (GNAC) rivals Western Washington and Saint Martin’s also played.

GNAC Honours

Clan athletes Chris Crisologo, Rebecca Bassett, and Madeline Hait were named GNAC athletes of the week for the week of October 62-28. Crisologo is a member of the men’s golf team while Hait plays on the volleyball team. Bassett received her award for her performance at the Stanford Invitational.

Cancer Battle

A fundraiser was held at the Academic Public House on Sunday for former SFU football captain and 1996 Calgary Stampeders draft pick, David Lane, who was diagnosed with cancer earlier this year. The money will be used to help Lane seek treatment options outside of Canada.

With files from SFU Athletics and GNAC Sports

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Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

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© The Peak Publications Society

Simon Fraser University’s independent student newspaper since 1965.

For advertising inquiries: [email protected]
For promotional inquiries: [email protected]

© The Peak Publications Society