Sitting in the dark because these motion sensor lights are pissing me off

By: C Icart, Humour Editor This year marks the fourth time SFU ranks number one in so-called Canada for innovation, and if this is what...

Minimum wage worker doing the job of three people is excited for 65 cent wage increase

By: Hailey Miller, Staff Writer and C Icart, Humour Editor News anchor: Alexa, play “7 rings” because the minimum wage is increasing to a whopping...

Move out of the way cisheteros, it’s not about you this month

By: Cam Darting, SFU Student I think it’s time to move to a different city and start anew. Everyone around me is a fake ally....

An SFU background extra tell-all

By: Petra Chase, Editor-in-Chief SFU students have been observing a strange phenomenon across campuses — more and more common areas filled with students just hanging...

Joy Johnson realizes she took her guard down too soon

By: Freida Watermelon, SFU Student Content warning: mentions of genocide. Joy Johnson is exasperated because she does not know what more she could’ve done! The Board...

Gen Z learning Gen Alpha slang to beat “aging like milk” allegations

By: C Icart, Humour Editor A local Zoomer (they did not want to be referred to as such, but this is my article and I...

Everyone hates the stairwell detour at Commercial-Broadway

By: Hailey Miller, Staff Writer If you’re a regular SkyTrain-goer in Vancouver, chances are you’re no stranger to being outrageously inconvenienced. Now, TransLink wants us...

Joy Johnson breathes a sigh of relief because there is no SFU encampment

By: Freida Watermelon, SFU Student Content warning: mentions of genocide. As she was sitting in her office reading the most recent message from the UBC president...

Get in girl, we’re serotoninmaxxing

By: C Icart, Humour Editor Dear diary,  Today, I watched a reel of a mother telling her daughters to go outside via a parody of Jojo...

Local enby starting every conversation with “have you purchased my gift yet?” during their birthday month

By: C Icart, Humour Editor After 11 torturous non-birthday months, soon to be 25-year-old Blue Rose (again, totally not a pseudonym I am making up...