By: Kelly Chia, Humour Editor and Peakie-of-the-Century
Dear Peakie,
I want to have a cool new aesthetic but I don’t know where to start! I’ve been scrolling through colour palettes, Pinterest boards, and everything you can think of to find my look, but it’s not working. GIVE me a new aesthetic!
From:
Sylvia the Styleless
Dear Sylvia the Styleless,
Ohoho! You’ve come to the right Peakie. Here’s the thing: we often want to dress in a new aesthetic but don’t really have the budget for our ideal style. Based on this conversation and your vibes, your style is the salacious “discotheque garbage bag!” So I suggest incorporating some money pieces from your aesthetic. Try a cute garbage bag handle for your accessory this week, or maybe even stick some glitter on your shirts to charm your professors and classmates during class presentation.
Love,
Peakie
Dear Peakie,
This is a secret I’m entrusting only to you (and your intrepid readers). This is my strictest confession. The other day, I gulps hummed the tune of Wicked’s Popular. I learned the moves of Footloose. I even, and I shudder to admit this, watched three seasons of Glee in one week. What’s HAPPENING to me? Is there a solution?!
From:
Lost in La La Land
Dear Lost in La La Land,
Oh no. Oh dear. I’m afraid you’ve contracted the most concerning disease of our lifetime: theatrekiditis. I’m happy to tell you that it does get better. After about four years. Until then, stay wary of Matthew Morrison. He will be your mortal enemy during these harsh and troubling times.
Love,
Peakie
Dear Peakie,
I have no idea how to make friends as an adult. Especially in pandemic times. Is exchanging a text or Discord handle still hip? Can I invite them to pottery for our second outing? What’s the protocol these days?
From:
Friendless in Vancouver
Dear Friendless in Vancouver,
Well, you know what they say! You make friends where you see people most. Try starting a musical number while you’re on the SkyTrain during rush hour! You would be surprised at how many people would be willing to do a fully choreographed dance sequence with you. Or, steal into a cat café and ogle at the beautiful friends there (except if you are allergic). Maybe you’ll meet a pal! Be the main character, Friendless in Vancouver.
Love,
Peakie