After working a few years in a restaurant, I’ve become all too accustomed to the short fuses of dining customers. I’ve witnessed and played host to some astounding and unnecessary behaviour from displeased customers who unfairly claim they are being “mistreated” who scrutinize over the most minuscule problems or misunderstand how a restaurant is managed entirely.

Treating restaurant or any other servers like they’re second-class citizens has to change. As is, this treatment reflects our society as being pampered and unsympathetic.

A server’s job is incredibly difficult. The amount of multitasking and time-management it involves, including running back and forth between customers, taking care of payments, and ensuring customer satisfaction is both mentally and physically exhausting. When customers become angry for insignificant issues, this only adds to the stress that servers are already inundated with.

I am personally disappointed and disturbed by the unnecessary aggression, carelessness and self-centered nature that many restaurant-goers do not hesitate to display. Engulfed in their sense of what good customer service should be, agonizing over food not matching their specific tastes or agonizing over countless other meagre problems with a restaurant, they fail to recognize the weighted stress that servers are under — though they are apparently aware of their own position that allows them to power-trip over servers.

Customers angry over insignificant issues only adds to the stress servers are inundated with.

I once had a customer send back a plate of fish after he accused me of over-cooking it. Once, I distinctly remember a customer physically threaten a couple of my co-servers over a simple miscommunication. And, in an extreme case, I once had a young dissatisfied couple yell obscenities at me before fleeing the restaurant without paying. We had the police on them in no time.

If you have never worked in a restaurant and/or find these reactions justified, then let me enlighten you: servers are the people who serve your food. They typically do not prepare your food, but are the mediator between you and kitchen. We’ve all heard the phrase “don’t shoot the messenger.” Here, this could not apply more.

I am disgusted to recognize how this restaurant-culture behaviour reflects our society. We are, evidently, one that likes to complain for its own sake. We are so used to being pampered that, if even the smallest thing does not go exactly to our liking, we have no problem in vocalizing our distastes through unnecessary aggression. It’s time for us to lighten up, get over ourselves, and become a little more understanding.

The next time you go to a restaurant for a meal, treat your servers like people. Be extra friendly to them, in light of their job being possibly one of the most difficult customer-service jobs around. Think twice before you complain. If you have a problem with what you’ve been given, take your complaint to those actually deserving, such as the cooks or the restaurant manager. Please, maintain your dignity and don’t be ignorant. Show servers the respect they really deserve.